As I said earlier.  We are just sharing what worked for us.  You have to find what works for you.  Reading what DID NOT work for us can help you avoid common mistakes and misconceptions. This is the internet.  Buyer beware.  There are no gurantees, and no, you don't get your money back.  Make some choices.  See if it helps.  Go from there.

Recovery is a process.  We get it wrong.  We tweak it.  We learn something.  We realize a mistake or mistakes we made.  We learn.  We grow.  We try again, this time a bit different...

We all wish you the best!   Really.

I understand what you are saying. I've said the same thing several times.
I want to learn from others who have succeeded. 
But almost nobody has written a list of a few things that they have done that were effective.
This would be very helpful for all of us still struggling in the quicksand to break free.
Everyone is different, but surely we could pick a few strategies from this one and a few from this one.
That is if people who have succeeded or are succeeding long-term are willing to please share their list.
1.
2.
3.
4.
5.

There aren't any simple solutions. There's no on/off switch. It's a gradual process. It takes time, patience and there are many things to learn along the way. Duvid Chaim is very experienced with leading people through this process on his calls and he gives plenty of time for questions.

Take a deep breath and enjoy the journey. There will be ups and there will be downs. But as long as you're willing to continue to learn and develop you'll be fine.

Besides the handbook, you have more suggestions on this thread than you know what to do with.  YOU write the list.  YOU DO the list.  Then YOU see how it goes.  Feel free to share your progress with US.  I would suggest that less is more.  Don't try to do 20 things at once.  Baby steps, baby steps.  I'm happy to discuss via PM if you want to discuss specifics.

cordnoy wrote on 02 Feb 2016 12:34:

Yosef Tikun HaYesod wrote on 22 Jan 2017 12:08:

I LOVE numbers 1 2 and 5
number 3 for me is reading the forum constantly
and number 4 i will check it out.

Gibbor, I email but don't really pm.
There is more than I can deal with, which is why it's so helpful to get people's short lists.
And then pick a few.
Thanks, Watson...I'll let you know about the phone call. 
He wrote back in great detail and seems nice.

And I'm going to get the krias Shema al hamita of the Arizal
in Hebrew and English and start saying it, bli neder.
Some people think I'm nuts if I think that saying the Shema and fasting are going to help.
Some have said that not a single person has used that strategy to succeed, 
and wouldn't work, wouldn't help, and was crazy.
But I'll take the Arizal and Baal HaTanya on my team any day!
------------
I had a chavrusa who told me that I didn't have what it takes to stay on my diet
and lose all the weight. That sucked and was hurtful/onas devarim.
But it made me want to prove him wrong and actually in a reverse weird way
helped me to lose the weight and stay the course.

Yosef Tikun HaYesod wrote on 23 Jan 2017 13:24:

You will never win this lust fight.

You will always be watching streaming clips.

Your finger will always be clicking on those underwear links.

Your wife will never satisfy you, as you will have the films in mind where the woman simply wants to please the man over and over again.

Lust addict for life!

I see what you're trying to do...and why your name is Trouble.
Still not nice to read that.
I guess that's the point...to ignite a fire.
The thing is it's just believable enough to be truly hurtful.

What I said was that I'm sure many in history have been helped by the Arizal shma & fasting etc., but from all the post I've read on this forum, both recent & going back to 2009, I never saw anyone on gye post that their success was due to fasting & saying long Shma. 
I wish you much hatzlacha and hope that you will be the first. 

Yosef Tikun HaYesod wrote on 23 Jan 2017 14:01:

If you believe it, why would it be hurtful?

Trouble wrote on 23 Jan 2017 14:38:

Now now, Yosef is a troubled soul.

Yosef Tikun HaYesod wrote on 23 Jan 2017 13:24:

Yosef, I have found success in a similar way. I don't fast or say the Arizals shema but I do go the mikvah every morning. I learned that going to mikvah lessons ones taavas nashim and therefore decided to start going. There is something to following what our gedolim say helps "behind the scenes". I find it is also a good time for me to daven that I shouldn't have any nisyonos or fall that day.

That being said, I don't think you can solely rely on these kind of solutions to be a magic cure. You must do them in conjunction with others that work for you and together I think you will be able to succeed.

Good luck!

Yosef Tikun HaYesod wrote on 23 Jan 2017 13:24:


Did you speak to any Daas Torah or Rov who thinks that this is what you personally are supposed to do? To me it sounds like a BAD idea- placing the emphasis in the wrong place.

You ask for advice of what to do, people are telling you what didn't work for almost anyone on the forum- and yet you go ahead with it.

Are you taking people here seriously?

How about stopping to look at women- I wrote that and many others have to; what do you think about that?