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My Story - Reallygettingthere

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Scientific studies show that it takes 90 days to break an addictive pattern in the mind. Start your own Log of your journey to 90 days! Post here to update us on your status and to give each other chizuk to stay strong!

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TOPIC: My Story - Reallygettingthere 56729 Views

Re: My Story - Reallygettingthere 12 Aug 2013 23:58 #215907

reallygettingthere Current streak: 72 days OFFLINE Platinum Boarder Posts: 759 Karma: 27	thank you both for the chizzuk
	Roy in the SA White Book noted that we frequently prayed and it did not work...because the best we could muster was begging G-d to "Please take it away, so I will not have to give it up! No amount of sobriety can cure the insanity -ChaimCharlie The emmes hurts but fake chizzuk will hurt more -Bards Remember, best block, no be there - Mr. Miyagi

Re: My Story - Reallygettingthere 13 Aug 2013 19:58 #216006

gibbor120 OFFLINE Platinum Boarder NEVER EVER GIVE UP! Posts: 5251 Karma: 166	really good stuff, really getting there!
	My Home \| My Links \| Dov Quotes \| Dr. Sorotzkin \| Handbook \| Additional Tools \| AA Audio \| Shalom Bayis \| Skep's Tips

Re: My Story - Reallygettingthere 16 Aug 2013 21:47 #216411

reallygettingthere
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Leichter Done (actually I started last night and finished this morning)

I've been here since the day after Yom Kippur 5773.

There were no words to describe the resentment I had towards my wife (not hate or disgust, just resentment and I was a "big tzaddik" for making the mariagee work of couse)

But now

There are no words to describe the love and admiration that I have for her and no words to descibe how lucky I am.

There were no words to describe the resentment I had for myself.

But now

There are no words to describe the sipuk that I get out of living life for real.

There are no words to describe the hakoras hatov that I have to GYE and to the chevra on the site.

Good Shabbos

Love,

Eli

Roy in the SA White Book noted that we frequently prayed and it did not work...because the best we could muster was begging G-d to "Please take it away, so I will not have to give it up!

No amount of sobriety can cure the insanity -ChaimCharlie

The emmes hurts but fake chizzuk will hurt more -Bards

Remember, best block, no be there - Mr. Miyagi

Re: My Story - Reallygettingthere 16 Aug 2013 22:30 #216413

gibbor120 OFFLINE Platinum Boarder NEVER EVER GIVE UP! Posts: 5251 Karma: 166	Wonderful!
	My Home \| My Links \| Dov Quotes \| Dr. Sorotzkin \| Handbook \| Additional Tools \| AA Audio \| Shalom Bayis \| Skep's Tips

Re: My Story - Reallygettingthere 23 Aug 2013 20:23 #217027

reallygettingthere
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Just opened to to a new level of clarity.

Feeling stressed out and not seeing options was something that drove me to porn in the past.

I know that because I feel that kind of stress now.

But...

I know I am am not where I was in the past
I am focused on solving the problem, not making the hurt go away
Mr. Yetzer Hora, you cannot hurt me
but you can scare me and then I might hurt myself
The trick is not to be scared

Re: My Story - Reallygettingthere 23 Aug 2013 20:30 #217029

ZemirosShabbos OFFLINE Platinum Boarder pass the compote Posts: 6153 Karma: 72	והעיקר לא לפחד כלל
	Sometimes life is like tuna with not enough mayonaise ~Inna beshem ZS Give, Forgive ~Cordnoy The reason I'm acting as if I'm pregnant, is because I'm expecting. I should be accepting. ~TZ

Re: My Story - Reallygettingthere 23 Aug 2013 20:35 #217030

reallygettingthere Current streak: 72 days OFFLINE Platinum Boarder Posts: 759 Karma: 27	ZemirosShabbos wrote: והעיקר לא לפחד כלל I heard from R' Avrohom Schorr (on a CD of a shiur in Mesilas Yesharim for Beis Yakov girls) That this means even though the bridge is narrow, there still is enough room for our feet to stand. (As long as you don't try to take an alternate route)
	Roy in the SA White Book noted that we frequently prayed and it did not work...because the best we could muster was begging G-d to "Please take it away, so I will not have to give it up! No amount of sobriety can cure the insanity -ChaimCharlie The emmes hurts but fake chizzuk will hurt more -Bards Remember, best block, no be there - Mr. Miyagi

Re: My Story - Reallygettingthere 23 Aug 2013 20:40 #217033

cordnoy
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no hopes, no worries, no fears....

you guys are da best!

focus on doing da right thing right now, and nothin' else

all of us can fit on da bridge with that mehalech

thanks so much

My email: thenewme613@hotmail.com
My threads: Mikvah Night - Page 1, Page 2, Page 3, Last Page

https://guardyoureyes.com/forum/1-Break-Free/210029-Tryin

Warning: Spoiler!

My job: Punchin' bag of GYE - "NeshamaInCharge"
Quote from the chevra: "Is Cordnoy truly a Treasure Island pirate from the Southern Seas?"

MY POSTS ARE NOT WRITTEN AS A MODERATOR UNLESS EXPLICITLY STATED.

Re: My Story - Reallygettingthere 23 Aug 2013 21:15 #217041

reallygettingthere Current streak: 72 days OFFLINE Platinum Boarder Posts: 759 Karma: 27	cordnoy wrote: all of us can fit on da bridge Thanks To clarify: I am not feeling a pull to lust right now, but in the past I would have been the London Bridge (falling down). My focus now is not to get into s pre-slip situation
	Roy in the SA White Book noted that we frequently prayed and it did not work...because the best we could muster was begging G-d to "Please take it away, so I will not have to give it up! No amount of sobriety can cure the insanity -ChaimCharlie The emmes hurts but fake chizzuk will hurt more -Bards Remember, best block, no be there - Mr. Miyagi

Re: My Story - Reallygettingthere 23 Aug 2013 22:13 #217054

inastruggle Current streak: 25 days OFFLINE Platinum Boarder the picture is shimshon hagibor. not st. mary.... Posts: 1263 Karma: 35	ZemirosShabbos wrote: והעיקר לא לפחד כלל The nanach kappel is working it's magic. Rellygettingthere, beautiful thought up there. Shkoyach. Don't think you mentioned the leichter yet...
	Last Edit: 23 Aug 2013 22:14 by inastruggle. Reason: perfctionism made me put a strecheleh in the don't and also capitalize the shkoyich if u rly have to know

Re: My Story - Reallygettingthere 23 Aug 2013 22:16 #217055

reallygettingthere Current streak: 72 days OFFLINE Platinum Boarder Posts: 759 Karma: 27	inastruggle wrote: Don't think you mentioned the leichter yet... Leichter done... Like a boss
	Roy in the SA White Book noted that we frequently prayed and it did not work...because the best we could muster was begging G-d to "Please take it away, so I will not have to give it up! No amount of sobriety can cure the insanity -ChaimCharlie The emmes hurts but fake chizzuk will hurt more -Bards Remember, best block, no be there - Mr. Miyagi

Re: My Story - Reallygettingthere 23 Aug 2013 22:18 #217056

gibbor120 OFFLINE Platinum Boarder NEVER EVER GIVE UP! Posts: 5251 Karma: 166	reallygettingthere wrote: I am focused on solving the problem, not making the hurt go away I assume when you say "solving the problem", you mean "turning to Hashem and asking Him to solve the problem"
	My Home \| My Links \| Dov Quotes \| Dr. Sorotzkin \| Handbook \| Additional Tools \| AA Audio \| Shalom Bayis \| Skep's Tips

Re: My Story - Reallygettingthere 23 Aug 2013 22:19 #217057

reallygettingthere Current streak: 72 days OFFLINE Platinum Boarder Posts: 759 Karma: 27	gibbor120 wrote: reallygettingthere wrote: I am focused on solving the problem, not making the hurt go away I assume when you say "solving the problem", you mean "turning to Hashem and asking Him to solve the problem" Of course. I was simply refering to my frame of mind.
	Roy in the SA White Book noted that we frequently prayed and it did not work...because the best we could muster was begging G-d to "Please take it away, so I will not have to give it up! No amount of sobriety can cure the insanity -ChaimCharlie The emmes hurts but fake chizzuk will hurt more -Bards Remember, best block, no be there - Mr. Miyagi

Re: My Story - Reallygettingthere 27 Aug 2013 06:53 #217353

reallygettingthere
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Update:

I was thinking that I have nothing to say but I would just post that, but I gues I have something to say.

I saw a "stress fracture" in my line of defense. Today when checking the headlines an image was visable on the webpage that should have automatically made me move the cursor to close the window, but instead i right clicked and blocked that image leaving me exposed an extra second.

Now, I'm no tzadik but to me this looks like a crack in my defense.

I am consciously making myself aware that this is not the way and I need to make sure this does not happen tomorrow.

Eli

Re: My Story - Reallygettingthere 30 Aug 2013 16:58 #217935

TehillimZugger OFFLINE Platinum Boarder לבד הנשמה הטהורה Posts: 2446 Karma: 34	reallygettingthere wrote: a shiur in Mesilas Yesharim for Beis Yakov girls ZemirosShabbos said Thank You, Hellllllllloooooooooooo?!!!!!! Moderator?! Trigger?! Ummmmm are you doing the leichter today?
	?דער באשעפער לאווט מיך אייביג. וויפיל לאוו איך עהם My Creator loves me at all times. How great is my love for him?