Hi!
I wanted to update the chevra how things are going for me.First of all you all should know that I never really believed that I would be able to stop my masturbation problem. I have major anxiety and I'm also a very sensitive person. For many years I've used masturbation to calm me down. Later on I found bad things online that turned me on... It was very hard to control myself. I could never even take a nap because before I knew it I was masturbating.It was tremendous hashgacha protis when I was visiting somebody he happen to mention that he got a filter through gye that helpes people with addictions.. This person had no idea of my situation. This led me to check out gye. In the beginning, the sight seemed rather strange to me, but I must admit that it is gye that really gave me the courage to finally do something. Thank you gye!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!Today is the fifty first day that I have not masturbated!!!How did this happen? With Hashems help I decided that if I masturbate I will say the entire sefer tehillim before I got to sleep. Even if it meant staying up two hours at night to do it. In addition I would give $50 to tzeddakah. It also happens that I randomly picked up a twelve steps book before finding out about gye that was also helpful in realizing that I need to give this problem to Hashem. It can only be handled with the help of a greater power..The first week or two I bought myself a treat as a reward and promised to get myself something for the continued success.The most amazing thing about all this is that I had issues wish ejaculating during intercourse. Since I've abstained from my OLD behavior, my sex and my marriage is amazing.I do have an ongoing struggle that my wife is not naturally loving. This is difficult since I do need her now more then ever. With hashem help she will change but even if not life is a trillion times better this way. I have never showed my wife such love and that is a great feeling.
Much Hatzlacha to all of you! Continue davening and trying and you will succeed!!
YG
