There's so many guys that join GYE and everyone goes all crazy on them to reach out to a friend or a mentor.

I feel that they don't understand the benefits of reaching out, ill try to explain how it helped me, and everyone can post how it helped them. Maybe then people will see the benefit's and send that text or call.

Since my Kedusha issues started, I dealt with the issue of looking at myself bad, a failure. I cant learn because I have these issues. I cant daven because I have these issues. I cant be close to HKB''H
On top of that I was very active on social media, so I considered myself a part of 'that' world, the 'dark side' of Yiddishkeit. This was my real world, while my family, wife and children was my fake world.  Backwards, I know, but that's how I felt, because I identified so much with my issues.

When I finally reached out, and met. I realized that no, I'm not this big rasha. I could learn even though I have these issues. I could be a loving father and husband even though I have these issues. Most importantly, I'm not part of 'that' world. I'm part of this world. GYE, growing, learning, encouraging, and understanding. I'm part of the good and amazing side of Yiddishkeit. 

Besides for this just opening up and telling over my life story was transformational. Instead of it being locked up inside of me, I felt free from the shame, pain and guilt. Even though I still have my moments...

Now I don't think that its necessarily good to reach out to just anyone, but there are guys on here who have helped thousands of Yidden, Bachurim, Yungerleit and Balebatim. From porn to masturbation to in person to shalom bayis. We can all get helped.

Ill steal from proudyungermans list,
HHM - Hashem Help Me - is the mentor-in-chief around here. He's reachable at michelgelner@gmail.com.
Some of the other great guys here are Eerie - 1gimpelovitz@gmail.com, Muttel - muttel15@gmail.com,   Reb Akiva - mevakesh247@gmail.com iwantlife - iwantlifegye@proton.me minhamayim - minhamayim1@gmail.com amevakesh - amevakesh23@gmail.com

Remember no one will look at you as bad, just read their threads.... they've been there done that, and still deal with these issues.

Love it!

Honesty and connection are some of the strongest tools out there.

I'll just throw in a plug for the Vaad Project (links in my signature). If you're not ready to pick up the phone and open up to a mentor, join the Vaad. Anonymous, group support from people in the same boat as you. Low-key the easiest way to start connecting. 

Beautiful and important post thank you Cleanmendy

On a personal note, when I made my first post way back when, the thought of reaching out to someone never crossed my mind, when it was suggested in response to my post, I thought there is absolutely NO WAY I will ever talk to some random stranger about this sort of stuff, I'm naturally quite a reserved person.  I did reach out to Eerie that day and it was the single greatest step I made.  

Why? 

Because, I desperately needed someone to explain to me that I am not my thoughts.  In my thoughts I was a low, awful, terrible person who is clearly nuts as I can't control my actions.  In reality I'm a nice guy, a good husband, a good father and indeed a good yid I just need to learn the skills of how to deal with this one issue. I got my self esteem restored and in addition made great friends.  

Reach out friends it's liberating 

If I may add. 
When I joined I Was on for months talking to nobody. Even after I saw posts from others is till could not do it. It wa only when I joined the VAAD that made me on speaking to others. Seeing how encouraging and understanding they were ( and still are).

Thank you Cleanmendy for thinking  about others to raise the topic!!