See below.

abd297 wrote on 20 Apr 2016 19:56:

The thing about the boundaries is that I never made a conscious decision to create them; it was just a fact in my head. It's weird, maybe it's a gift from Hashem that He wouldn't let me fall to the lowest of the low.

The discussion with my father came after many, many days and nights of hurting greatly from the guilt of what I was doing. Baruch Hashem, my parents have always been approachable and open to discuss anything, so that made it easier. Once we started talking, it all just came out, and it ended up being a two hour conversation till early morning.

I don't remember any follow up really. Doesn't mean that there wasn't any, I just don't remember.

P.S. Sorry about the double post. Trying to get the hang of things...

I just had the first nisayon of my GYE life. I was feeling all inspired, on fire about my new commitment. So going to the supermarket was a shock back to reality. Before I left though, I tried to prepare myself for what I would have to deal with, as per the advice of someone on here. Of course when I got there I realized it was every bit as challenging as I thought. Every turn of the head was a potential pitfall. I got stuck looking a couple of times, but quickly snapped away as soon as I chapped. Then I had to try not to replay what I saw, as per the advice of the same poster as before who's name I can't remember. 
But when I got home, I realized I was feeling stirred up. I helped around the house a bit, and then made a mad dash to the computer .

How's the computer?
Still in one piece?

markz wrote on 20 Apr 2016 22:06:

GYE made it a soft landing.

Birshusi wrote:

Great!!

Have you done bedikas chometz yet?

I mean hiding the 10 neatly arranged porn folders, somewhere really good on your fathers computer, so he won't be able to find them even with the help of the IRS

markz wrote on 20 Apr 2016 22:09:

Uhhh...in my dorm before I left yeshiva.

EDIT: Now I see your post. There are no folders to hide. I always erase the history right after...

You know the concept ODAAT
One day at a time

Would you care to share what tools you've discovered on your first day

Hey you still have 7hr to go!

Same thing happened to me. The first week or so I was walking around like a crazy person. Did I look? What if she came into my view and I maybe didn't look away as fast as I could? Oh no, do I really have to go to the store, there may be women there.
It cools down a lot. Especially when you get more level headed about where you are and what you need to do. 
I learn the hard way a lot that you can't do it all at once. Take it one situation at a time and please DO NOT look for perfection! That's probably my number one problem. 
I don't think I ever consciously made boundaries but they are and were always there. I happen to have broken some of them down over the years because in this addiction you always want more. Always crave new and exciting things. No way you can stay with the exact same thing for even a short time. 
Did your father do or mention anything else besides taking way the iPod? Maybe he didn't fully grasp how deep you were or can become? Just a thought. 
Keep us posted and all the best!
 

markz wrote on 20 Apr 2016 22:22:

Just the fact that I'm actually on GYE has taken over my mind since last night. Apparently over 100 people have seen my story, which means they know my deepest secrets. It's frightening, even though I'm anonymous. But I know I needed to do it, and now there's no turning back, so I'm all in.

abd297 wrote on 20 Apr 2016 22:41:

I wasn't all that overwhelmed about going out, it was just the only thing that was on my mind, and it was different to be on high alert. But now that I think about, I am kinda looking for perfection, as if now that I joined GYE, I should be cured. But l'maisah, if I looked, I was oiver an issur, so how could I not be caught up in perfectionism?

That's a big question for me too. I think the basic answer is as follows: 
Definitely stay away from things that are clear and cut assur.
Definitely don't go for chumras or anything drastic. 
Things that are assur but you can't just never do again, need work. You can slowly make progress and work on them, while still trying to avoid them completely. If you don't perform on the high level you expected then you can assess it. Was the bar too high? Was I careless? Did I really need to go there, do this, etc? When you have the answer you can work on  the situation and with the right tools you can make progress. 
Also, as much as we need to do, Hashem is the one who runs the show. With davening and doing our part, He smoothes out the edges and helps us with what we need to do.
As it goes, Haba letaher, mesayin oso. 
That's my idea of what the answer is. It's obviously not IT, but it's a start. Please comment and critique as you feel necessary. 

ABD
Did you manage to speak with your Rebbi?

How did it go?

abd297 wrote on 21 Apr 2016 01:46:

Your post reminded me of an answer that I've known all along and I've even told to other people; I guess it's different when it's about yourself... Hashem only demands from us what we are capable of doing, and at this point, all I am capable of is to be constantly aware of my nature to want to see, and to take steps to ensure that I don't put myself in difficult situation. (Or to be prepared when it will likely be hard. I can't not go to the supermarket the week before Pesach, not gonna happen.) That's step one. At the same time, I need to work to get an understanding of what's driving this obsession, and to cut it off at the source. That should take more work and time, I assume.