watch the alcohol friend

Holding by day ONE.
I have a taiva to reset my count every day, then I"ll only be counting one day.

There is only today.

serenity wrote:
...

... Stacked upon the last who knows how many days.

Hashem constantly creates the world anew every second (as you are aware). Our actions today are what define us and are brought into fruition in part through our past. So our actions today define our past as well. The yeridah of yesterday is part of what brings us to the aliyah of today and that yeridah is encompassed in, enclothed by and elevated by my actions today. The only negative effect of past actions that remain is the damage that I have caused to others and for that I obviously must make an amends.

Saw this recently (on a sign in front of a church, of all places!) and liked it...

“We are products of our past, but we don't have to be prisoners of it.”

Flying tomorrow, first time since I joined the program, quite apprehensive of what's forthcoming.

I"ll try answer that as if someone asked me for advice.

1. Bring along an interesting book, at least one, so you have what to do and be focused on.

2.Travel with a friend who you'd be uncomfortable acting out around. (Which I"m actually doing)

3. Whilst sitting "doze off" or keep focused on your book, no need to let your gaze wander when your stationary.

Any more tips, ideas, advice etc are most welcome.

berelfiner wrote:


Yes....connect with God today...admit to safe person (if you are an addict) that we are powerless over this and it is humbling.

Hi Berel, how was your trip?

Gevura Shebyesod wrote:


Depending on how much one inhales, one trip can take longer than the next.

Boruch Hashem, took a sefer I wanted to read and went through quite a lot of it. Slept the rest of the flight.

good to hear!

Do not allow past occurrences to define your identity, define yourself with your future actions.

My excuse for not posting lately is that I was at home, where the internet is password protected, so I barely managed to check my email. (I really don't owe anyone an explanation, but just wrote that anyway.)

While I was at home I spoke to the Mashgiach, who I've already spoken to about the issue 5 years ago. However I spoke with him to arrange when I would speak him, but I didn't manage to speak to him in the end. I went through the whole emotional turmoil... for nothing?

First of all, hope is not all lost, I"ll see again Sukkos and then we could talk.

Second. as I was thinking what to tell him, I went through my whole history of addiction in my head, what came about when? When I thought I had recovered, How I then fell again etc. Which of it's own is a positive thing.

Besides I thought to my self, why am I only focusing on the bad side of my history? So I made an account of all the good, When I was intorduced to Gemoro, Rashi. Tosfos, learning gruntig etc. When I developed this way in Davening. How I gained a geshmak in Niggunim etc etc.
Which helped a lot to put everything in perspective.