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TOPIC: Reclaiming my life 7825 Views

Re: Reclaiming my life 03 Jun 2014 23:40 #232923

  • Watson
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From what people with a lot of sobriety have told me.

Iy"H one day I'll be able to speak from experience. Right now all I've got is what I've read and heard from people who know.

Re: Reclaiming my life 04 Jun 2014 02:10 #232924

  • cordnoy
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the little that I have experienced.....I could say it from experience.

I am addicted...always will

in recovery mode now and though I have struggles here n' there, I do feel better

and sir...stop beatin' yourself up!

Get serious about action and recovery and see what works for you and what doesn't.

b'hatzlachah friend....be well
My email: thenewme613@hotmail.com
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Re: Reclaiming my life 09 Jun 2014 12:32 #233085

  • tzudreiter
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My taphsic shvouah didn't help much aside for having to give 950$ to tzedaka. Next shvuah i want to have to tell someone, which i am very afraid of doing, does it have to be someone who understands the nature of the issue or can it just be a close friend?

Re: Reclaiming my life 09 Jun 2014 16:45 #233094

  • Pidaini
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R' tzudreiter,

Can I ask you, what are you looking for? What is your goal?

Telling someone shouldn't be part of a shvua, telling someone is part of honesty!! Do you make honesty a "punishment"? I am in touch with people very often, and I tell them if I've slipped, taken second looks at women on the street, if I'm fantasizing, and when I'm feeling good.

I'm open and honest about my situation, I'm not trying to pretend that I'm not human, that I don't have a problem. I am human and I have desires and that's FABULOUS!!! Now, I can't say that I'm always happy with it, but most of the time it's just fine.

How about you? Are you ok with the fact that you're human and that you're not in control of your thoughts, (some) sites that you see, moods and many more things?
Yankel | My Ladder | Talking to Hashem
I'm just a dude, another guy on this bus.
Have a great day, unless, of course, you made other plans. ~ obbormottel
"Nothing changes as long as everything stays the same" ~ Dov

Re: Reclaiming my life 09 Jun 2014 17:23 #233097

  • cordnoy
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keep in mind that there is a good chance you will violate the tapshik...accordin' to where you are holdin' now.
therefore, make sure that person is safe and one you can trust with your secret.
that bein' said, if he is such a person, the hell with the tapshik and just tell him anyway!

b'hatzlachah
My email: thenewme613@hotmail.com
My threads: Mikvah Night - Page 1, Page 2, Page 3, Last Page

https://guardyoureyes.com/forum/1-Break-Free/210029-Tryin
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Re: Reclaiming my life 09 Jun 2014 17:58 #233106

  • dd
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cordnoy and pidaini, you guys are always hitting it on the mark!!!!

now listen here r' ????????? don't punish yourself rather give yourself the greatest tool to recovery, open up,

i know its a bit scary, been there in the past, but anyone i spoke or chatted with all say it was the first step they took to recovery and all of them felt great after they did that, and so did i even though i was so scared to do it,

so go for it!!!!! KOMT!!!

Re: Reclaiming my life 10 Jun 2014 07:53 #233194

  • tzudreiter
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So i should open up to anyone i trust?

Re: Reclaiming my life 10 Jun 2014 08:02 #233195

  • cordnoy
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not to anyone.....but to the one most trustworthy....don't take my advice though....but gettin' help is crucial.

b'hatzlachah
My email: thenewme613@hotmail.com
My threads: Mikvah Night - Page 1, Page 2, Page 3, Last Page

https://guardyoureyes.com/forum/1-Break-Free/210029-Tryin
:pinch: Warning: Spoiler!
My job: Punchin' bag of GYE - "NeshamaInCharge"
Quote from the chevra: "Is Cordnoy truly a Treasure Island pirate from the Southern Seas?"

MY POSTS ARE NOT WRITTEN AS A MODERATOR UNLESS EXPLICITLY STATED.

Re: Reclaiming my life 10 Jun 2014 09:23 #233198

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Dont you all agree that its hard to crawl through a dark tunnel if you dont see the light at its end?

Re: Reclaiming my life 10 Jun 2014 09:32 #233200

  • cordnoy
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Who told you the tunnel is dark?
Who told you to look at the end?
You also insinuated that there is light at the end of the tunnel...how do you know that? And if you do know that, perhaps it is closer than you think. And if you don't know that, perhaps you are not even in a tunnel in the first place.
And why the heck are you crawlin'?

Bottom line sir....the moment before you ain't no tunnel and it ain't dark either and you ain't crawlin'. And ask God to help you for this moment.

b'hatzlachah
My email: thenewme613@hotmail.com
My threads: Mikvah Night - Page 1, Page 2, Page 3, Last Page

https://guardyoureyes.com/forum/1-Break-Free/210029-Tryin
:pinch: Warning: Spoiler!
My job: Punchin' bag of GYE - "NeshamaInCharge"
Quote from the chevra: "Is Cordnoy truly a Treasure Island pirate from the Southern Seas?"

MY POSTS ARE NOT WRITTEN AS A MODERATOR UNLESS EXPLICITLY STATED.

Re: Reclaiming my life 10 Jun 2014 10:30 #233207

  • tzudreiter
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Im sorry cordnoy, i dont understand excactly. I know im in the dark because i feel it (or at least i dont feel light). And i hope to the good lord that there is a light.
Please explain yourself (as you can see im new here)
Thank you

Re: Reclaiming my life 10 Jun 2014 12:21 #233214

  • shivisi
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Pidaini wrote:
R' tzudreiter,


~ Telling someone shouldn't be part of a shvua,
~ Telling someone is part of honesty!!
Do you make honesty a "punishment"?



Just because something is in itself a very good and productive thing to do, and should be done ANYWAY when if a person falls, even without the taking on of the shvuah, this is [IMHO] not a reason not to use it as a "punishment" as long as it is a very difficult thing for the person to do.
A person may say that even though I understand that its real honesty and a very productive and important thing for me to share my falls with others, but being that it is its very very hard for me to do, so in order to keep myself from having to get into that situation,I will make a shvuoh, that if I fall should have to tell someone that i fell, and that will give me a stronger motive not to fall.
[Even giving Tzedakah which is surely a very good thing to do, not a "punishment" that you want to try to avoid, is nevertheless always used as a recommended idea in the taphsics, so definitely having to share a fall is something you want to avoid by NOT getting into that situation].

Re: Reclaiming my life 10 Jun 2014 15:41 #233219

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tzudreiter wrote:
Im sorry cordnoy, i dont understand excactly. I know im in the dark because i feel it (or at least i dont feel light). And i hope to the good lord that there is a light.
Please explain yourself (as you can see im new here)
Thank you


you are in a dark tunnel searchin' for the light when you are lookin' at the far away future and don't know how you will get there. Focus on the present. God is with you. He will help you thru the moment ahead of you. Many times in our life we feel that the world is on our shoulders, for there is so much to do and we are so distant from accomplishin' it....look at the task before you.

b'hatzlachah
My email: thenewme613@hotmail.com
My threads: Mikvah Night - Page 1, Page 2, Page 3, Last Page

https://guardyoureyes.com/forum/1-Break-Free/210029-Tryin
:pinch: Warning: Spoiler!
My job: Punchin' bag of GYE - "NeshamaInCharge"
Quote from the chevra: "Is Cordnoy truly a Treasure Island pirate from the Southern Seas?"

MY POSTS ARE NOT WRITTEN AS A MODERATOR UNLESS EXPLICITLY STATED.

Re: Reclaiming my life 12 Jun 2014 23:32 #233442

  • Watson
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There's no such thing as darkness, there is only an absence of light. A little light can dispel a lot of darkness. Let the light of Hashem in and you'll see the path ahead.

And remember, recovery begins with one sober hour.

Re: Reclaiming my life 13 Jun 2014 16:32 #233485

  • Pidaini
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R' tzudreiter, how ya doin?
Yankel | My Ladder | Talking to Hashem
I'm just a dude, another guy on this bus.
Have a great day, unless, of course, you made other plans. ~ obbormottel
"Nothing changes as long as everything stays the same" ~ Dov
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