You gotta make some sort of commitment.

The vicious cycle aint helpin' you any.

stop thinkin' so much about it, and all your dilemas....just do it!

IMHO

b'hatzlachah

Cordnoy... JDI isn't really doing it for me .

I'm still clean. On second thoughts, scrap that still. I'm clean. Right Now.

Good news is my exams are over - no more stress for now. Bad news is LOTS of free time...

Gonna keep myself busy. But gonna need you at my back.

Love U Guys.

I'm on your back. YO STAY HERE TOE THE LINE

TehillimZugger... I haven't yet read a post of yours that hasn't made me smile.
Thank you .

I love LOTS of free time......usually ends me up looking for something to do, and one of the most exciting things is to try and figure a way around the filter.....

How much of a designated schedule can you make yourself? The more specific the better.

KOMT!!!

Fightingaddictionnow wrote:


What's JDI?

Just Do It

Hello Heilige Yiden! .

Haven't posted in a while. Official Update .

I'm not having it easy. Not that I expect it to be. Just saying. Been slipping and sliding and have come close to acting out. Not sure if they count as a slip or fall, but I think dissecting each action is only feeding the Yetzer Hora - "This is only a 'slip', so it's OK..." etc. But really my urge to look at what we mustn't is actually a desire to act out. So I've been able to overcome that and I'm clean - so I count that as a win.

My Shmeiras Einayim in general is better though. I don't take second looks and am more diligent when out. Part of that is still whiteknuckling, but more of that in a minute.

One of my main causes to do Aveiros is boredom. So I've been keeping busy and B"H it's been a lot better. I try to distract myself a lot as well - so even if I've got nothing to do, playing games and so on has helped. (Any more advice on this guys - I started a thread for it here .

On the "Whiteknuckling vs. Breaking Free" side of things, I've spoken to a rebbe of mine about it (Aveiros in general, and using AA as the example...) and I'm starting to figure it out more. I've realised that Whiteknuckling is an essential PART of Breaking Free. Everyone says it's a bad thing. I think it's a part of the process. We NEED to force ourselves and hold back, but - with Hashems help - eventually we need it less, get less urges and take control!
Disclaimer : This is just me putting my random thoughts on paper (well... screen). It might be obvious to you - or you may disagree! Let's discuss it . (We did start it here, but let's continue...)

Thank you all so much. It really helps me to post and discuss these things with you. Feel free to email/PM/post - it's what keeps me going .

Good Shabbos Guys.

Love S

Hey.

Holding by today. Which by the way is the 19th today Boruch Hashem.

Just came so close to falling and had an easy opportunity to see things of the worst kind. Never managed to stop myself when I was so close, so theoretically I should be on top of the world. Unfortunately it doesn't work that way. I dunno about you guys, but even though I know I've done the right thing, I don't feel as good about it as I think I should be. If you know what I mean.

Anyway, just wanted to post saying that. I'm working on myself and not going down! Will hopefully post again before Shabbos. It keeps me going.

Thank you all again. Please give me your thoughts - email me (fightingaddictionnow@gmail.com) - it's so helpful you guys can't imagine.

S

Hey.

Holding by today. Which by the way is the 19th today Boruch Hashem.

Just came so close to falling and had an easy opportunity to see things of the worst kind. I stopped before I got there. First time I've managed to stop myself when I was so close, so theoretically I should be on top of the world. Unfortunately it doesn't work that way. I dunno about you guys, but even though I know I've done the right thing, I don't feel as good about it as I think I should be. If you know what I mean.

Anyway, just wanted to post saying that. I'm working on myself and not going down! Will hopefully post again before Shabbos. It keeps me going.

Thank you all again. Please give me your thoughts - email me (fightingaddictionnow@gmail.com) - it's so helpful you guys can't imagine.

S

No time. Shabbos in a few min.

Just want to check in. B"H doing well.

May Hashem give me and all of you the strength to be strong against in all our endeavours.

Good Shabbos

S

Great work! Keep it up!

Fightingaddictionnow
You think every single time we "win" (Gosh, I hate that word) you think we should be on the top of the world? That streamers should be falling from the sky while we are standing in the middle of a giant stadium with thousands of people cheering because we didnt look at the girl, Or Fall, or we learned lots, or anytime we do something good?? No. Thats not how it works. After we do something good, we don't get high and we shouldn't. Thats called escaping life. Yes after a while we may start feeling much better but just cause we don't fall doesn't mean $1000 should fall from the sky. We are addicted to the quick fix, that sharp quick pleasure.

You my friend. are starting to taste the goodness of life. Keep at it you'll feel WAY better than when you fall, or look at a girl etc.

KOL!!!!!!!! (KEEP ON LIVING)

Try looking at what you do from the time you wake up until you go to sleep. There are numerous opportunities for strengthening your daily activities, or Seder HaYom, so that a maximum amount of time is not time when you would either think of masturbation or reading, downloading or watching porn. I never thought that I would ever be 90 days clean, let alone reach my 300th day , which I have done despite the obvious fact that many women in NYC dress in the summer, even in offices, with the adage of "less is more." Yet, if you recognize the nature of your addiction, and build up your daily routines for constructive use of time, you won't be thinking of bypassing the filter-an issue which indicates that filters are not capable of being disabled by anyone with the technical know how and desire to bypass the same.If you rely on the filter without committing to recognizing the issue for what it is, no filter can prevent you from bypassing it.

Hey guys.

Having a bit of an issue. Twice this week I unintentionally 'fell'. By that I mean that according to the 'rules' I'm still clean but it still feels wrong. Every mention of dreams, nighttime etc that I've seen is just responded to with a 'work on what you're in control of'. I get that. Just saying I'm still upset about it. Gotta KOL though!

Overall I'm B'H ok. Still growing. Slipping. Gettin' up. Learning.

Have an unbelievable, inspirational, uplifting and impacting Shavuos.

KOT. KOL! KIT.

S

It's your life.
It's your rules.
It is you that knows what the triggers are and what you are doin' to avoid them.

Let me say somethin' here that I believe to be true (although I don't know it as a fact).

In my 30-plus years of lust addiction, I have had nocturnal dreams that were heavy-laced, and suffice it to say, I "fell" many times in those dreams. I lived a life of fantasy which extended to my dreams.

Now, with the help of God, actually with Him leadin' the way, and with the chevra here, and with the guys in SA, I am in recovery mode for five months. When I do let my mind wander for a third and fourth thought, or when I allow my eyes to feast on the so-called pleasures of this world, I feel it at night. It didn't need to be heavy thoughts as I was goin' to sleep, and it is not every time, but it is only on those days (basically) that any of those dreams pop up.

In conclusion, I am not sayin' you should count it as a fall, even if you end up with z"l in your sleep; I am sayin' that it is probably an indicator that your day needs improvement (like mine sure as hell does).

thanks

b'hatzlachah