Hello Everyone

I'm 16 years old and recently joined. Just feel the need to open up and seek advice since every other post seems to be coming from older users.

I've been looking at porn for the past few years, and acting out every few days for almost two years. I tried half heartedly to stop a few times, but am now determined. I've only been Tahor for three days, but am going to need some support if this is really going to happen. I also have major high school exams in the next three weeks, so am stressed and often tempted.

I've looked through the GYE site already and found some material. I've joined the 90 day list. (I also have a filter now installed on my computer and phone, but am still tempted to act out.) I would really appreciate some advice ASAP - just a list of resources, tips, inspiration - whatever you can.


Thank you everyone so much.

S.

welcome

there are tips all over da place here.

Biggest tip I can give is I wish 28 years ago, I would have been where you are now.

b'hatzlachah

oh...and one more thin'...get that "hopefully" outta your headin'!

We don't hope around here....we take action!!!

b'hatzlachah

WELCOME!!!! Its great to have you!! I strongly recommend checking out Skep's tips

read the gye handbook it really helps !!!

Welcome!

We're all in this together, Keep on posting!

Make sure to see the 12 suggestions on the First Time Here page.

Also, check out your Personal Home-page. It will guide you through each tool/task that we suggest, one by one, and help you track your progress in recovery.

wow. what a zechus to have come to the site at such a young age

We don't grow when things are easy- we grow when we face challenges.

Remember, Hashem gave his toughest battles to his strongest soldiers.

Live in the present - forget your past.
- take every day one at a time, even every hour or minute.

Take gradual changes, reaching out is key

You've come to the right place !

If you can't fly- run. If you can't run- walk. If you can't walk - crawl.
Whatever you do- you HAVE to keep moving forward!

You CAN do this!
Looking forward to hearing from you soon

Welcome!!

You are definitely in the right place here. There is lots to see/read, including forums from guys your age. Take one day at a time, every day as it comes - this is a great tool in itself.

Keep us updated and KOT!

I'm 22 had my issues at 16 as well. If only I would've gotten here at 16..., stay strong I'm also trying a 90 day streak now.
Hatzlochah HaShem is with you

I advise not to focus on the 90 days because if we think too much about 'holding on' till the next day, eventually we fall. And if we do fall we get angry, depressed and fall more and more. If we take it one day at a time- if we say" i promise hashem with your help I will be clean for just this hour or day"-
then it becomes more manageable.
This is because if we addicts find it unbearable the fact that we will never fall again, rather if we focus on not falling today and thinking we may fall tomorrow- but that is not what i am worrying about now-
Days will add up but that should not be your main focus- we need to surrender our lust.

This is from Guard:
Surrender basically means that we realise we can't do it on our own and instead of continuing to battle it, we tell Hashem - Hashem, I can't do it - but You can. So please help me.

As long as we still fight, we sometimes push Hashem away because we might feel in our heart that we don't really need Him 100%. But when we finally admit the truth about ourselves that we CAN'T do it ourselves - we finally allow Hashem in fully - and then HE does it for us.

But to allow Hashem in fully requires work... working on our character defects, integrity, etc

cordnoy wrote:

CORDNOY!
how the GEHENNOM is THAT a tip?!

keep it up .im 17 so i feel i can relate to you a bit.i never imagined i would go 16 days clean so you can do it .question why are you guys teling us were so lucky that we caugt it early.do you guys regret those years you did fall .also is ur life diferent when your clean?

TehillimZugger wrote:


It's a tip, for it gives chizuk.
Some people here might be depressed due to their situation.
I am sayin' that it is what to be proud about.

This could help inspire one to continue on.

ich bin zainer wrote:


Do we regret those years that we fell???

What do you think?
If we would have to do it over again, would we do it the same way?

Is our life different now that we are clean?
the question astounds me!
Read people's posts.

The reason we are here is not because we were cuttin' the nail of our fourth finger before the pointy one.
We are not here because we separated the carrot off the fish with a fork on Shabbos, and we only wanted to eat the fish later.
We are not here because we came late to mincha and we missed the first amen after ashrei.
[I am not condonin' any of those thin's.]

We are here (at least some of us) cuz' our life was unmanageable. We were governed by our tayvos and lust. Bein' clean is a whole different ballgame. Don't get me wrong. We/I are still addicted to these fantasies, but with the steps, with the tips from our therapists and mentors, we are able to live life....for how long? for right now.

b'hatzlachah