Dov wrote:


I was klerring: When someone distorts his friends fake name (cordnoy-corduroy), is that bichlal המכנה שם לחבירו, or is it in the geder of כל המשנה ובא אחר ושינה בו פטור

Just klerring aloud.

MT

cordnoy wrote:

myself. I shared an abridged version on one of the 12 step phone calls. It took about a half hour if I remember correctly. It was very liberating. It's hard to describe. There is a certain sense of calm and serenity. A self-acceptance and peace with oneself.

The first step is admitting powerlessness. The first step inventory is the "evidence". It helped to concretize how much I was a slave to lust. It's not just an idea in my head, or a nice sounding theory. I have 20 years of evidence to back up that fact.

Machshovo Tova wrote:

I think it's shinuy shem, shinuy mazal .

I like the humor about my name

Keep it up

I had a great week of chizuk here

A gutten shabbos

That's great, cordboy. (just having some fun w it now that I got busted, and all.... )

And here's an observation from the past few years of living sober:

The best and most effective chizzuk is not 'encouragement'. Rather, it is getting help to fully accept the truth about myself and my life as it really is right now, without misreading it or blowing it out of proportion. No drama needed, no self-pity needed, no jealousy needed...just acceptance.

The acceptance of that with both hands is such a powerful thing, it makes all other 'encouragement' unnecessary and actually just a distraction.

There is a great story about that in the back of AA, called "Acceptance was the Answer," or something like that. And rav Noach Weinberg z"l used to share a great true story about a happy old man and his acceptance right after an accident at the age of 11 that he will be a man with only one leg from now on.

Acceptance of a fact is so far from just 'knowing' it.

Hatzlocha, chaver, whatever your real name is...

Thank you

I don't mind the "pokin fun of name" business.

I chose the name, for it reminds me (just in case I need it) as to why I'm here

I wanted to start off the week with some notes on my first week here, and completion of 2 clean weeks

I learned:
1. I don't need to strive too high (just past idiot stage)
2. God is there to help us then (prob even before as well)
3. Focus on right decision for that moment
4. My addiction now is as a cheater (which is why I didn't respond to even her innocent email tonight)
5. With wife, focus on giving only (and although intimacy hasn't been strong, the love and bond we are experiencing together has been great)

Thank you so much

I think this is guy's thread so here's an awesome quote from a chat I had with him:

(he is answering what has been helping him)

"just acknowledging that hashem is in control, not trying to like it, just recognizing the truth of it"

I am very sad to hear it. I also do not have willpower to fulfill most positive and negative commandments. But my principle is to avoid the worst sins.

>> I haven't had a real urge to watch porn and/or masturbate since the day
>> after I joined GYE, which was 12 days ago.

Great!

That is something to be very grateful for! Thanks so much for sharing that here w all of us, chaver!

Seems like there has been some recent activity on this my thread, so I'll update you on whats been happening with me.
I joined the GYE community about 4 months ago.
Thanks to all the amazing stuff that I have read on here, and lots of thinking and most of all, a TON of help from hashem,
I managed to try during Elul to recognize hashems being in control of the world.
Since then, and with such open help from hashem, I have shot up in my emuna, and B"H have been clean for about 1 and a half months! Looking back I can't beleive hashems kindness in helping me get so far. This has also opened my eyes to all of the wonderful things that hashem has given me. I don't know how I was zoche to such an amazing wonderful life!
Currently I am working daily to recognize hashem directing my life, and to LOVE it!
Thank you all so much for your help!
I hope that thees words [especially for whoever reads this thread from the beginning ( was that really me? )] will inspire you and open your eyes to see that there is a light at the end of the tunnel (even if you think that you're worse than me).
I hate writing like this since it feels like bragging, but I am sure that other people will be happy with my success, and that success is a lot thanks to them, and if it inspires other people, then it's definitely worth it!
Hope to continue posting with ever better news and insights!
Guy.

Bragging?! You?! achh....nobody would ever accuse you of that!!!

(and if they do just send them to me, I'll take care of 'em)


KOMT!!! KUTGW!!!

guy wrote:


AWESOME

Wow, awesome!
Thanks so much for sharing the good news.
People have no problem posting when they screw up, so it's always good to hear when someone is actually getting well.

Sweet news, Guy, thanks and hatzlocha with all the relationships in your life.