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not modest sister in law
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TOPIC: not modest sister in law 2229 Views

not modest sister in law 10 Apr 2017 16:19 #310609

  • hopfulshimon
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hi
​my brother recently got married to a very provocative immodest pretty girl.
i am now forced to spend my holy night if the Seder trying to fight for my life attempting not to stumble looking at her. i am sure i am not the first one to have this problem so if anyone has any simple ideas to help make my 8 days of pesach a free experience and not feel like i am trapped in the clutches of the sutan all day.
thanks

Re: not modest sister in law 10 Apr 2017 16:37 #310610

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To put into context, I've included your previous post.
Please try keep posting on one thread as I (try to) do

hopfulshimon wrote on 10 Apr 2017 16:19:

hi guys I am new to the site,
After reading the forum I realized I am no where close to what a lot of you
suffer from. my heart really goes out to the all people who suffer from ssa.
I was sexually abused by a man when I was 5, and have since then fantasized about it.
I have acted out with boys in my class till I was in 9th grade. From then till I got married at 23 I suffered tremendously but never acted out.
I am married now with 3 kids now but since day one of my marriage I was unable to perform without artificial stimulation, by looking online before or thinking of men.
if anyone has any tips to help or can give me support I would appreciate it.
(I am seeing therapy)


hi
​my brother recently got married to a very provocative immodest pretty girl.
i am now forced to spend my holy night if the Seder trying to fight for my life attempting not to stumble looking at her. i am sure i am not the first one to have this problem so if anyone has any simple ideas to help make my 8 days of pesach a free experience and not feel like i am trapped in the clutches of the sutan all day.
thanks


Look,
If she's not dressed appropriately and prayers can't be said, I don't know how much of a Seder you can have with them, unless you turn your back, which will then solve all your problems

If shes dressed appropriately, you know what I think?

Thank Gd my brother didn't marry a witch. Be happy for him, and you may start to be happier too
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Re: not modest sister in law 10 Apr 2017 16:56 #310613

  • birshusi
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If it is possible to arrange, try to sit on the same side of the table as her, with as many people as possible in between. It'll be harder to see her that way.

If you slip up, don't beat yourself up. It's totally normal and understandable. Try your best of course, but don't get down if it doesn't go perfectly.

Re: not modest sister in law 14 Apr 2017 05:44 #310676

  • Chaimel
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Did things go over well?

Re: not modest sister in law 20 Apr 2017 16:13 #310943

  • colincolin
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Birshusi wrote on 10 Apr 2017 16:56:
If it is possible to arrange, try to sit on the same side of the table as her, with as many people as possible in between. It'll be harder to see her that way.







Yes, and next year, also do this, but you sit to the left extremity of the table and discretely in advance ask the host to sit the sister in law to the right extremity of the table.
So you can lean to your left to avoid looking at her, and if anyone asks why, you explain you are meant to lean to the left!
Last Edit: 20 Apr 2017 16:14 by colincolin.

Re: not modest sister in law 20 Apr 2017 22:55 #311004

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ColinColin wrote on 20 Apr 2017 16:13:

Birshusi wrote on 10 Apr 2017 16:56:
If it is possible to arrange, try to sit on the same side of the table as her, with as many people as possible in between. It'll be harder to see her that way.








Yes, and next year, also do this, but you sit to the left extremity of the table and discretely in advance ask the host to sit the sister in law to the right extremity of the table.
So you can lean to your left to avoid looking at her, and if anyone asks why, you explain you are meant to lean to the left!

Good thing the world is flat.
i'm all about that (substantial) bass, no trouble ....

if you're looking for trouble, you can email me @trouble69gye@outlook.com

Re: not modest sister in law 21 Apr 2017 09:48 #311054

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Birshusi wrote on 10 Apr 2017 16:56:
If it is possible to arrange, try to sit on the same side of the table as her, with as many people as possible in between. It'll be harder to see her that way.

If you slip up, don't beat yourself up. It's totally normal and understandable. Try your best of course, but don't get down if it doesn't go perfectly.

maybe even let her take your wife's seat next to you. but on the right side of you, obviously.
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