Hello guys,

first of all I wanted to say how great of a job you make here for everybody. Thank you very much!

Now my issue, I acted out for severla years with porn and masturabtion until two years ago when i went to yeashiva in Eretz Israel. Before somehow I knew it is not good to do it but I never put real strength into it. Then after my first visit in Eretz Israel I stopped it for severals months until I had a specific dream and ejaculated at night. The whole day I was not normal and in my mind I went to a porn website and did THE SIN.And the cycle of doing it and remorse started again. Then I am now again in a Yeshiva in eretez Israel (I was studying and now I finished) and got the strength through Torah learning to stop again. And not even that, I stopped also actively watching television, reading nonsense (like Mangas) or watching series (e.g Game of Thrones) because I understood this all can be a trigger.

BUT STILL at leat once a week when I sleep I have an ejaculation at night (or during midday nap) and I feel like the pleaseure of it the whole day!!! I try to go after that to the Mikvah but it disturbs me a lot!!!! I think by myself perhaps I can not do tshuveh anymore, perhaps my soul is already sold to the other site, perhaps .... and I am getting very depressed!!!

I have to mention I am now home in Bein hazmanim and so far I did not access, blessed be the Almighty, any of dirty websites ( there is no filter on the FAMILY computer). But what should I do with that ejaclation problem? Sometimes I even know that I fought in my dream not to do it. Sometimes I was successfull and sometimes it happens!!! By the way I am clean now for 3 months and ca. 16 days.


Thank you very much for your help!!!!

Welcome,

Focus on what you do durin' your wakin' hours.
That is where your avodah should be.
What happens durin' your sleep is up to God; let Him handle that.

b'hatzlachah

You're doing some amazing work.

Please don't think for a second that this nighttime stuff means that you haven't done teshuva or that your teshuva hasn't been accepted.

I find that when I'm very clean during the day -- aggressively guarding my eyes from all women, and surrendering my thoughts and fantasies to Hashem -- I don't have a problem during sleep.
But if I'm sneaking peeks here and there, and letting images and fantasies sit in my brain, then there can be issues at night

pun intended

this is indeed a very sticky issue

hi

please note there are some סגולות about that, 1 is to say the first ד' מזמורי תהלים
But don't think about that it's a way of the Yeitzer Hora to pull you back, if you do good during the day then it has nothing to do with you.
just Daven to god and he will take care of it.
don't get into Anxiety mode about it IT'S NOT YOUR ISSUE just watch yourself during the day and pray to Hashem and he will take care of it.

lots of Hatzlocha!!!!

Wet dreams will occur sometimes, at least before you're married. According to Chazal, the only person who this never happened to was Yaakov Avinu. It happened to everyone else - even Tzaddikim Gemurim. So, don't focus on what happens when you're sleeping, but keep your focus on what you do during the day.

i think i agree with everyone else, focus on what you are doing when u are awake, sleep isn't ur issue. i find that if i am having lustful thoughts before bed then many times i wake up with a wet dream. i would say don't fret about the neshama stuff, you would probably have to be a higher level to understand those topics, unless i'm talking to a kabbalist. personally, i had/have big issues w/ this also and pesukim have never stopped me from having one.

peloni almoni wrote:


That is hilarious!!

A nocturnal emission is something that occurs by itself, against a person's will, the person is not considered to have committed a willful transgression.

Here are some tips:

1) Always guard your eyes carefully during the day.

2) Guard yourself from lustful thoughts.

3) The Kitzor Shulchan Aruch offers advice on preventing keri like reciting the first four Psalms before going to bed, and not overeating before retiring to sleep, and avoiding spicy foods..... The Arizal advises the concentrated recital of the Shema before going to bed as both a preventative measure and as a rectification of the souls that were taken captive by the waste of semen in the past. He also advises wearing a tallit katan while sleeping as further protection.

A post from the Heiliger Guard - this is Gevaldig!

Reminds me of the days when GYE was not well known and Guard had time to post more often - I miss those days sometimes. However, I'm grateful that GYE has grown to the point that it can help many more people, be"H, even if we don't get to hear from Guard that often.

What about the days when Kedusha had time to post more often

Ouch - I miss those days too!

peloni almoni wrote:




MisterD91, We all have a problem with wet dreams. I for one kinda enjoy them because it takes my mind off of having sex for awhile. I hope you can overcome this issue with much hatzlocha.

The Arizal said that a nocturnal emission is a sign that a sentence of death has been removed.

I know myself that if I am having sexual thoughts in the day, it is more likely I will have a nocturnal emission.

Hello Everyone, I have had not a wet dream in some time now, B'H.
I know that Kabbalah is kind of like a fairy tale- based explanation.
A book that I have is Kabballah based. It states that whenever you ejaculate at night, you waste holy souls. I ,personally, don't believe this to be true. A wet dream just happens at random. The book is called The Light of Ephraim.

I hope this everyone feel not as guilty.

shmuly z

shmulyz18 wrote:



my dear shmuly

a few points:

1. congrats on your accomplishments so far. you have made progress, and beezras hashem, you will grow more and more. as we say, keep on truckin'.

2. kaballa is perhaps the highest and most elite form of torah study. it was started when raziel hamalach gave the first kaballah sefer to adam harishon at the exit point of gan eden, continued by avraham avinu who wrote the sefer yetzira, rabbi nechunya ben hakana, rabbi akiva and rabbi yishmael writing the sefer habahir, midrash osios, and midrash heichalos respectively. and finally, rabbi shimon bar yochai with the zohar, which the ramak and arizal work to explain. during the times of the mishna, kabbala (called maaseh merkava - see second perek of chagiga) was only taught to students who met certain criteria. the gemara realtes that three tannaim reached further than they could handle, and were permanently harmed. during the rishonim, rabbi yehuda hachasid and his father rabbeinu shmuel (called in tosfos in gittin shmuel hanavi), the ramban, rokeach, the raavad, his son rabbeinu yitzchak sagi nahor, rabbeinu bachye, and the rikanti, were all noted kabbalists. many if not most of them were ashkenazim, as the ashkenazim only recently (1650's) started to shy away from kabala.
kabala is traced back to adam. to say kabala is fairy tale, my dear shmuly, is apikorsus. i chalk it up to your probable lack of knowledge, and therefore, it is probably am haratzus. nonetheless, for you to offer your "personal belief" and perspective against a sefer, you have to be well-versed in the subject yourself. for example, i would be a fool to read a book on brain surgery and argue with the author if i was not educated in the subject myself. why should the holy kabala be any less? are you well versed in it?
if yes, why would you call it fairy tale?
and if not, why do you argue in something you have no education in?

3. regarding the subject matter: al pi kabala, and al pi chazal, at times, keri at night may be a negative sign. but it must be dealt with properly. not dwelled upon and used for fuel or as an excuse for more acting out. and though it is always convenient to "believe" that it means nothing, and it does nothing - take a look in the yom kippur davening. part of the viduy is הרהרנו ביום ובאנו לידי קרי בלילה.
therefore, let us not focus on the past, let us focus on how to not focus on the past by focusing on the future.