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TOPIC: Mad at Dad 1313 Views

Re: Mad at Dad 11 Sep 2013 23:10 #218897

RebYid90
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How dare we let fear play a role in our lives
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Karma: 4

i totaly understand your feelings. i personaly didnt even know it was assur untill i was doing for for over 3 years. i was jus trandomly looking through a kitzur shulchan aroch and stumbled across the section and i was literaly knocked of my feet. i dont think i was ever more scared, upset, depressed, and self hating then when i found out, and realised i couldnt stop for more then a couple of days at a time. i think it must be talked about.

"....You start giving to others, and you’ll start to see your pain fade away.... If you want to kill yourself, kill what you don’t like. Kill narcissus.Kill apathy. Kill the shameful selfish looser inside of you. I had an old self that I killed..... You can kill yourself too, but that doesn't mean you got to stop living...kill the part of you that's all you and nobody else, because that's the part that makes you want to curl up and die"

"Fear plays an interesting role in our lives. How dare we let it motivate us? How dare we let it into our decision-making, into our livelihoods, into our relationships?..."

Re: Mad at Dad 12 Sep 2013 00:12 #218909

TehillimZugger
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לבד הנשמה הטהורה
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gibbor120 wrote:

I hear that. I sometimes wonder if I would notice certain things if it weren't for the shulchan Aruch. Skirt must be past the knee. Someone has to check to make sure

. Who is going to kvetch about how women aren't tzanua if no one is checking???

Totally unrelated I'm just curious (and I just asked my sister about it, she didn't know...) what is the source of that "covering the knee" Halacha?

?דער באשעפער לאווט מיך אייביג. וויפיל לאוו איך עהם
My Creator loves me at all times. How great is my love for him?

Re: Mad at Dad 12 Sep 2013 00:23 #218912

gibbor120 OFFLINE Platinum Boarder NEVER EVER GIVE UP! Posts: 5251 Karma: 166	Probably "Shok b'eisha ervah" Berachos 24a. See Mishna Brura [75:1:2]
	My Home \| My Links \| Dov Quotes \| Dr. Sorotzkin \| Handbook \| Additional Tools \| AA Audio \| Shalom Bayis \| Skep's Tips Last Edit: 12 Sep 2013 01:01 by gibbor120.

Re: Mad at Dad 12 Sep 2013 11:01 #218965

smiley1900
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Here's my (unconventional) take: You're mad? Good! Take that madness and let that motivate you to do whatever you can to make sure you're children won't be mad at you! (they'll probably be mad at you anyway, but that's life...) Educate yourself, educate others, make a committee!...

As for the actual issue of whether or not to say and when, I believe that there are so many variables that can affect the outcome either way that we cannot just give a "psak" on this and say "this is the way it should be done", until we have real data that can give a more accurate picture of the outcome of each approach, tested in various environments, it is up to each parent to evaluate the variables that affect these decisions, i.e. the nature of the child, the environment of the child, and to very carefully evaluate the pros and cons of each approach, in addition of course to consulting with a rov/rosh yeshiva WHO IS KNOWLEDGEABLE in the area of the chinuch of children.

Obviously, this is in addition to all that was said here about forgiveness, etc. especially erev yom kipur.

Lots of hatzlocho with everthing!

Re: Mad at Dad 12 Sep 2013 22:28 #219063

TehillimZugger OFFLINE Platinum Boarder לבד הנשמה הטהורה Posts: 2446 Karma: 34	Doesn't shok mean below the knee up until the knee?
	?דער באשעפער לאווט מיך אייביג. וויפיל לאוו איך עהם My Creator loves me at all times. How great is my love for him?

Re: Mad at Dad 13 Sep 2013 00:19 #219093

gibbor120 OFFLINE Platinum Boarder NEVER EVER GIVE UP! Posts: 5251 Karma: 166	I don't think so. It wouldn't make sense in this context. Did you see the Mishna Brura? I think there is discussion about it regarding the din of 'chazeh' and 'shok', but I'm not sure where it is at the moment.
	My Home \| My Links \| Dov Quotes \| Dr. Sorotzkin \| Handbook \| Additional Tools \| AA Audio \| Shalom Bayis \| Skep's Tips

Re: Mad at Dad 13 Sep 2013 10:06 #219154

inastruggle Current streak: 25 days OFFLINE Platinum Boarder the picture is shimshon hagibor. not st. mary.... Posts: 1263 Karma: 35	I think it's in hilchos matnas kehuna.

Re: Mad at Dad 13 Sep 2013 17:57 #219170

RoshYeshivasSon Current streak: 26 days OFFLINE Expert Boarder Once you admit, you can commit. Posts: 101 Karma: 2	Change subject heading to: Mad at Dad and Eyes on Thighs.

Re: Mad at Dad 13 Sep 2013 18:37 #219180

tryingtoshteig Current streak: 115 days OFFLINE Platinum Boarder תן חיוך, הכל לטובה Posts: 489 Karma: 13	RoshYeshivasSon wrote: Change subject heading to: Mad at Dad and Eyes on Thighs. Reminds me of Maybe we could add a couple pages... EYES THIGHS ~~Eyes on thighs~~ GUARD EYES Eyes off thighs DAD MAD Mad at Dad EYES GUARD Make God glad Make lad glad Make dad glad
	"ויעזור ויגן ויושיע לכל החוסים בו ונאמר אמן" -- ArtScroll Gabbai's Handbook

Re: Mad at Dad 13 Sep 2013 18:55 #219186

gevura shebyesod
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Is that "Hop On Pop"? That was my kid's favorite book (their favorite activity too).

!אנא עבדא דקודשא בריך הוא

וּבְיָדְךָ כֹּחַ וּגְבוּרָה וּבְיָדְךָ לְגַדֵּל וּלְחַזֵּק לַכֹּל

"If it would be so easy there wouldn't be a GYE, but if it would be impossible there also wouldn't be a GYE."
"Sometimes a hard decision leads to an easier outcome."
- General Grant

My story: guardyoureyes.com/forum/19-Introduce-Yourself/111583-hello-my-friends