I sent you a PM. Please respond.

some_guy wrote:

post anyway

Then cry! Tears are never turned away by Hashem! Daven, cry, speak to him! He's with you all the way!

Hi everyone!

I have had a great day. It is my 2nd day clean and I just feel so much better. Thank you all. You helped me pull through the depression. I will be sure to try to post more often than I have been.

--some_guy/Elias/Eliyahu

Great news
Keep it up
One moment at a time

Thanks for the update, great to hear!!

And keep posting that there is no news and you're trucking on, "no news is fantastic news"!!!

Hi S_G, glad to hear you are feeling better.

Hi,

Today I have had some urges, but nothing to serious. I think I will go the rest of the day clean. I won't worry about tomorrow, today is enough.

--some_guy/Elias/Eliyahu

Keep up the good attitude, Great_guy!

Hi guys,

I fell on Sunday. My Dad's computers are not filtered. I don't visit him often, and when I do my siblings usually come with me. That is enough to stop me from using those computer's. But my siblings are at summer camp right now.

I am not upset at all over this fall. In fact, I am a little proud. I went 6-8 days clean. I have only gone that long a few times in the last two years! I am confindent my future is bright.

--some_guy/Elias/Eliyahu

KUTGW

Dear everyone,

I have been in a bad place for the last few days. I found a way around my filter. I am going to add another one. I hope it will work.

--some_guy/Elias/Eliyahu

Howbout havin someone monitorin your comp?

Don't worry, cornoy, your intentions are good, but this is no chidush. If there were really a way to get control out of his hands and into another's, he would have thought of it and done it long ago. The reason people do not really do what they need to do to stay clean is because they are really not ready to do whatever it takes.

It's not that some_guy has rejected the ideas that will really work - rather, he simply never allowed himself to give them serious consideration. The idea of really getting rid of the problem, is too scary. Plain and poshut.

Some_guy, you know me, and you know yourself well enough to know that if you ever test a filter, you do not have a filter at all. If u will get a filter, update your filter, etc., then in the end you will have to simply never test it, period.

Or get rid of all internet for six months or so. Demand it be removed from the house.

But that is no solution, either - cuz you will still be able to masturbate yourself to images in your head - once the sweet porn is not there for you, you will start to manufacture it from your mind or from other sources.

Either you take real steps to let it go - or you keep playing this silly GYE-style "fight it man!" method, which is a failure for you.

I'm a stupid hypocrite. I come here and say I want to get better, but I never actually take progressive actions. I have not been here for a month. The longest time I was clean since I was 12 was a week, which is just pathetic. Even though I know there are two good free filters on this site, I have never installed them. Nothing is stopping me from doing these things, so I must be doing them out of free will.

I am just so disgustingly weak. I am not even sure if I am an addict or if I tell myself I am an addict so I don't feel responsible for my actions. I am not even orthodox. I don't say any of the prayers. I don't keep kosher. I don't wear tzitzits. I don't put on tefillin. I go to public school. I can't even read Hebrew despite going to my shul's pre-school and Sunday school. I am so terrible that my mom decided it would be best if I didn't read my Torah portion.

I don't belong here. I am not an orthodox Jew or a sex addict. I am hypocritical trash. As I wrote this, I realized that I am posting this so that everyone will say 'its not your fault' or 'you are too hard on yourself'. I am so pathetic that I have to manipulate strangers over the internet to get some self-esteem. I'm a stupid hypocrite.