The Library

Today is 100 days clean for me, and I would like to try and describe how I got to this point, and how I think I have changed over the past 3 months. I am a thirty something professional living in a large North American city. I attended several yeshivos over the years and ...

The annual Agudas Yisroel convention opened on Thursday night. Among the issues addressed by panels at those sessions and discussed by those who attended them was the persistent and ever-growing dangers posed by the internet and other electronic media in a session entitl...

I heard Rabbi/Dr.Tweski speak a couple of days ago and he asked, "why is the bracha of 'she'asah li kol zarki - He did for me all my needs' in past tense, when the other birchos hashachar are in present tense? He answered that chazal didn't want people to make the bracha ...

I have the zechus of hearing Rabbi/Dr.Twerksi speak most days for a few minutes in between Mincha and Maariv. Today, Hashem gave me some much needed chizuk. Rabbi Twerksi asked the famous question from the parsha, what does the pasuk mean that Yaakov's waiting for Rochel ...

RATM writes to someone who was unable to make it more than 3-5 days at a time for the past year or so, yet who still never gave up: You know, this 90 day chart is very, very important to me, and I do think it is very important... When I saw this site and started getting i...

The rest of today is worth a lot too. A lot of good can happen in a short time. And then there's tomorrow. Say Adon Olam slowly, with kavana. Maybe you'll have less fear, as I do when I say it, especially in my own words. Fear is a real nasty killer.

Uri writes to someone who had fallen into addictive behaviors that included live relationships: Hi, my name is Uri.We're coming from the same place, my friend.And you should know that the addiction to porn, masturbation, or sex are all very much from the same place.It is ...

I can't protect you any more.I can't make your hurt go away.I tell you I love you and show you I care.I try to help out when things don't seem fair. But my power as a mother goes only so far.I can't always reach the places you are.I want to be close like we were before,Bu...

A newborn baby is completely dependent on his mother, and from her side, the mother is completely devoted to it, fulfilling all its physical and emotional needs. Through the complete lack of control that the baby feels, it learns to trust its mother. And through her, it f...

The reason that the 12 steps are not about our lust problem (beside for the simple admission of our lust illness in the first step) is because our avodas Hashem/sanity/approach to life cannot be about fighting lust either. Focusing on fighting lust means we are probably t...

I was enjoying a glorious bright sunny day Strolling along a nice tropical beach I was taking in nature's beauty and relaxing my mind When, WHAM! A wave hit me and knocked me right down I felt a tugging sensation as I slowly came to While the undertow was dragging me stra...

There's only one way to go, and that's up! We gotta hang in there and learn as much as possible from this website on how maintain our sobriety. When I feel my Yetzer Hara coming at me, what helps me out a lot in dealing with it, is to tell him that he is more powerfull th...

As lust addicts, we often feel torn into two. On the one hand our neshama craves kedusha, while our yetzer hara keeps dragging us to the 'other side'. It reminds me of what Rivka imeinu must have felt while carrying Eisav and Yaakov. While obviously we are not carrying "t...

There's a personal story that I'd like to share with your community, which I hope will either inspire people or wake them up. I am not posting it on the forum because I would rather it be anonymous; it's very personal. As a persistent internet viewer, I always needed more...

Someone wrote on the forum: "I feel drained right now. I feel like I've been fighting the whole entire day. I just hope and pray I come out victorious. But it aint over till it's over. Please daven for me. I wanna get over this thing so badly. I feel that if I can get pas...

It feels so good to be clean, now I can really focus on so many other things without the guilt or stress of having just fell. My learning since I've been clean has been on a whole new level, and I'm being serious, the Gemara is much clearer and I'm able to retain much more information than I knew I could. Thanks Reb Guard and this whole beautiful family of Jews. Keep up the fight guys! We are bringing the Ge'ulah.

Dear Rabbi Twerski, My wife found out I was viewing pictures and she was very offended, and rightfully so. It almost ruined our marriage! However, since she found out and I admitted everything to her, literally everything, she suggested I get help. She thinks I have an ad...

When my wife and I started communicating more directly and clearly about this stuff, things really started getting better. Pressures and resentments were reduced significantly, and we were - and are - both happier, b"H. It took a few bouts of this "pain, then calm, then m...