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Dialog between a Gay Jewish man and the Webmaster

the.guard Wednesday, 18 January 2012


A while ago, I met a Kabbalist

I was told that they agree with modern science

people are BORN gay

this is our Tikkun in this lifetime, in this gilgul

we are born this way



Of course. Yes, you were born this way, and yes, this is your tikkun in life. Most normal men were born to desire pretty women, even if these women happen to be married. And yes, that's our tikkun in life, i.e. to learn to control ourselves and not act out on our desires.



I choose to go by those who say "do as many of the 613 mitzvot that you can, even if you are gay"

do as many as you can...don't throw all the Torah out

I love that approach!

Please don’t be upset.



My dear soul, of-course we need to do as many mitzvos as we can, but we also need to do as few aveiros as we can :-)

Try to limit the aveiros... don't ever let them become "permitted" in your eyes.

Hashem didn't create us to throw us into hell, but he wants us to try... only to try...



See, that's another thing: I am changing my perception of Hashem

He is not the angry, vengeful, jealous G-d that the Bible depicts

To me: he is kind, compassionate, loving, generous, unconditionally loving, abundant



So true... He is only good, kind and loving. But tell me, parents who slaps their children for running into traffic, are they loving parents or angry and vengeful parents?

One day when Moshiach comes, we will be shown how our suffering in this world was only love... so much love, we can't imagine. We will weep when we see how much we thought G-d had abandoned us, and we will see it was all love.



You are a deep, spiritual man

I wish you were here with me


A Gay man who was forced to take the shots and is doing much better today as a result, wrote to us as follows:

I'M FEELING guilty, VERY GUILTY, that I am taking the easy way out with the monthly shots, and almost everyone else is beating the yetzer hara with hard work. It's sort of like I'm cheating?

Our Reply:

It's not up to us to decide what we think we should be working on in life. What IS up to us is to do "the right thing". For some, that means "working on themselves" and for others that means "giving it up altogether".

Some diseases need just a healthy diet and exercise to keep in control, other diseases need pills or even shots. Not all people were created equal. For some, it's their job in life to work on themselves, for others, they need to rid themselves altogether of this and work on other things. As a matter of fact, the mere fact that you are willing to "give up" your sexuality in such a way, is also a form of "working on yourself" since you would rather have it and do what you want.

Someone on our forum wrote that he recently asked Dr. Krueger if the shots would accomplish making one not "addicted". Here was the doctor's answer:

No, one would not loose it; one would gain control over it while they were taking the shot; one might be able to learn other ways of obtaining control while on the shot so that if they stopped they would be able to control themselves. However, there is no guarantee of this, and some might have to stay on the shot forever.

Notice that he wrote "one might be able to learn other ways of obtaining control while on the shot so that if they stopped they would be able to control themselves". Have you been doing this? If not, there is no way you will be able to get off the shots. If yes, you might be able to decide together with your therapist, if the time is right for you to give it a shot without the shot :-)