I fell...

After 10 days off of p & m, I find myself getting overly confident in my abilities. I’m thinking things like, I can look at that or listen to that, and still be able to stay strong. Just now, I was searching for a song to listen to. I was thinking to listen to something I used to enjoy years back, that has women singing in it. I figured I’ll write here about my challenge first and see if I’m still interested after. I can’t get complacent. Always have to be proactive. Thank you for listening. Hatzlacha to all! Please give feedback. Much appreciated!

It's good that you realize the emotional feelings of complacency and realized that it's dangerous. It's good you got to this point. Now it's time to add extra strength so you don't become complacent. Perhaps something motivational or extra would be good.

There are many great tactics from managing urges, but they will only be effective if our goal is to stop completely over time, by progressively cutting down more and more. But if we allow ourselves to become complacent by simply keeping our addiction "under control", we will remain addicted to these behaviors. And as we often end up learning later the hard way, this struggle is progressive. It doesn’t get better on it's own, only worse.



Our sages have said: "There is a small organ in a man, if one feeds it - it is hungry, if one starves it - it is satiated". This is a very important Yesod to keep in mind, and it shows how much our Sages understood the nature of this struggle. The more we cut down, and the more distance we put between ourselves and the struggle, the easier it gets.

This morning I fell. Not to full on porn Bh because my phone is blocked, aside from GYE and work email. But I have google maps, and the yetzer hara is very creative, i was just searching up different places, and from there it one glimpse of something that just leads me down the rabbit hole. I had a fall. 

I've put it behind me already. Actually I haven’t. I feel it in my subconscious. My motivation has been down today. 

Thank you for listening chaveirim.

I feel very alone. 

Larry Bird wrote on 13 Jun 2022 18:46:

I can relate to this.
what has worked for me is remembering this after-the-fact feeling, so that when faced with a similar situation again, I can tell myself I don't want to go this route.

Larry Bird wrote on 13 Jun 2022 18:46:

So what’s the big deal. 
Delete the Maps App, and if you need more help with it go to your local tag play station.