Read once, then minimize to save screen space.

Forum Overview

Post on the forum to get support, tell your story and reach out for help when feeling weak!

You will never be alone in this struggle again.

The GYE forum is anonymous platform of group support, and a life-line of chizuk for hundreds of people in exactly your situation. 

To use the forum you need to first become a member of the site, sign up here.

After signing up to the site, go to the forum, enter one of our boards and press "New Topic" to begin posting! 

Welcome, Guest
Scientific studies show that it takes 90 days to break an addictive pattern in the mind. Start your own Log of your journey to 90 days! Post here to update us on your status and to give each other chizuk to stay strong!

TOPIC: Lets do this 3743 Views

Lets do this 20 Apr 2020 00:26 #348493

  • yosef10
  • OFFLINE
  • Gold Boarder
  • Posts: 210
  • Karma: 12
Day 2, going strong BH
"Sometimes the only Bechira we have is to ask for help"

Maybe you can gain something by following my journey... Or not, whatever works
MY Forum

Re: Lets do this 21 Apr 2020 05:27 #348545

  • Realestatemogul
  • Current streak: 433 days
  • OFFLINE
  • Platinum Boarder
  • Posts: 388
  • Karma: 29
Hey Yosef10,

I love the name because we know Yosef Hatzadik was the prime example of shmiras aynayim! 

Keep coming back on to post your success or your challenges, and we are all here to support you!

Hatzlacha!

Re: Lets do this 21 Apr 2020 13:38 #348558

  • DavidT
  • OFFLINE
  • Platinum Boarder
  • Posts: 1277
  • Karma: 87
Yosef Hatzaddik was one of the mightiest warriors to ever live. He won one of the most difficult battles of desire in history. This was no one-time event with a crazy woman coming after him, like they taught us in third grade. His victory was so astounding that Yosef is one of only two people to be called a tzaddik by the Torah.

We can deduce Yosef’s technique from the Gemara (Sotah 43a). The Gemara calls Yosef “the one who belittled (‘Pitpet’) his yetzer hara.” Rashi explains that ‘Pitpet’ means Yosef ridiculed his yetzer hara and conquered it, not considering it (its claims) to be anything of significance. Rabbi Henach Leibowitz, zt”l, (Chiddushei Lev Bereishis pages 225-226) explains that Rashi is telling us that Yosef did not primarily battle the yetzer hara with willpower, by straining and forcing himself not to sin. Rather, he belittled and disproved the arguments of the yetzer hara. This limited his desires and prevented his urges from growing stronger. The yetzer hara sparks feelings of desire. He tells us we want something and really need it. But all his claims are lies. The yetzer hara tries to make us think we can’t be happy without his wares, and he tells us that if we get it, our lives will be amazing. He peddles cheap pleasure and empty thrills as the greatest experience based on the faulty logic that it must be incredible if we want it so badly. But as we know, the strength of the desire does not correlate with the pleasure or its lasting effects.

This is what Yosef thought about to prevent his desires from increasing. Whenever the yetzer hara tried to convince him that sinning would be so amazing, he thwarted the yetzer hara by thinking about how physical pleasure is overrated. He observed the yetzer hara’s lies and dwelled on the falsehood. He proved the yetzer hara wrong and stopped his desires from increasing. That’s how he defeated the yetzer hara in such a lengthy, overwhelming challenge.

"If I am not for myself, who will be for me? But if I am only for myself, who am I? If not now, when?"
feel free to reach out @  ahavayirah@gmail.com

Re: Lets do this 22 Apr 2020 18:39 #348634

  • yosef10
  • OFFLINE
  • Gold Boarder
  • Posts: 210
  • Karma: 12
To see other people seeing me messages gave me a lot of chizuk (I just wanted to let you know that).

​Thanks so much and I will keep you guys posted.
"Sometimes the only Bechira we have is to ask for help"

Maybe you can gain something by following my journey... Or not, whatever works
MY Forum

Re: Lets do this 23 Apr 2020 03:28 #348672

  • Realestatemogul
  • Current streak: 433 days
  • OFFLINE
  • Platinum Boarder
  • Posts: 388
  • Karma: 29
Glad to help!

I personally know I wouldn't be who I am today without using GYE forums, so I really encourage sharing any success or challenges and we are all here to help!

Just take one day at a time and you will see amazing results! 

Re: Lets do this 23 Apr 2020 18:04 #348703

  • yosef10
  • OFFLINE
  • Gold Boarder
  • Posts: 210
  • Karma: 12
Thank you . BH already Ive been getting a lot of Chizuk form seeing you guys respond.

Just an update:
​I have Yeshiva almost all day on zoom, were learning Megilla the entire zman and the goal is to get about 8 or 9 Chazaras... so I really got to push

The Mussar Shmuzim and Hashkafa shiurim also have been helping.

Also today, BEZH ill start doing the fortify training program, I've been tracking this streak from now, but I'm going to kick everything into high gear as we take in Rosh Chodesh with Taphsic method aswel.
"Sometimes the only Bechira we have is to ask for help"

Maybe you can gain something by following my journey... Or not, whatever works
MY Forum

Re: Lets do this 26 Apr 2020 16:11 #348767

  • yosef10
  • OFFLINE
  • Gold Boarder
  • Posts: 210
  • Karma: 12
Baruch Haba, I'm going on day 9 and going strong!!

I recently had a question about how to prepare for the next coming battles on this page (https://guardyoureyes.com/forum/4-On-the-Way-to-90-Days/348766-Week-2-3-and-on#348766) if you havve any insights it would be greatly appreciated!!

​Thanks so much for keeping up, and keeping me going.

Hatzlacha Raba to everyone
"Sometimes the only Bechira we have is to ask for help"

Maybe you can gain something by following my journey... Or not, whatever works
MY Forum

Re: Lets do this 27 Apr 2020 02:18 #348783

  • yosef10
  • OFFLINE
  • Gold Boarder
  • Posts: 210
  • Karma: 12
Not gonna lie, it's getting a bit difficult after sitting through a day of Yeshiva... on the computer.
To strengthen myself a bit I've been writing what was and is really a cornerstone of any major streak I had, the taphsic method. With a bit more knowledge now Ive adapted it to my understanding and deal with the situation I'm in a bit better.

{{{{

Ani Nishba (I swear), Beshaim Ad— (in the name of G-d) that until {NEW DATE}        

If I have A FALL, which is defined by one of the following things:

Either: 

    1. I intentionally masturbate and finish while fully awake

    2. I intentionally obtain in any way adult sexual material

    of any sort, digital or printed (including magazines, DVDs,

    internet) and use it to arouse myself

    3. I intentionally go to any websites or web pages, pictures, videos, chats         or forums, for the purpose of viewing adult sexual content. 

        This includes any type of adult oriented images, drawings, Gifs, or

        even simply a picture of an adult film star        

THEN IF I PREFORMED

OPTION1: I go outside for a 10 minute walk or run within the 60 minutes proceeding A FALL and have only 1 session.

    Then within the next 36 hours I will rip up a $1 bill

   OR

OPTION 2: I go outside for a 10 minute walk or run within the 60 minutes proceeding A FALL but still have more than 1 session.

    Then within the next 36 hours I will rip up $7 worth of bills

   OR    

OPTION 3: I have A FALL without going outside for a 10 minute walk or run within the 60 minutes proceeding it (and have any amount of sessions)

    Then within the next 36 hours I will rip up a $20 bill

Some Disclaimers and Clarifications  … (Say immediately after (Toch Kidai Dibur)

If I ripped up a $7 worth of bills more than 3 times, this Shvuah should no longer be binding on me

If I ripped up a $20 bill even once, the Shvuah should no longer be binding on me

If I had A FALL without remembering that I made this Shvuah, I will only rip up a $1 bill

If I am honestly not sure that I had a fall, I will not have any KNAS.

If I do renew the Shvua for a later date before this one ends, I will be able to adjust the knasos and conditions of the Shvuah (Such adjustments will be with the intent to suit my situation better, according to my understanding).

If I do not renew this Shvuah for a later date before this one ends, I will keep the very same conditions of this Shvuah until I renew it for another time period

    If I had not renewed the Shvua before this one has ended, I will keep this Shvua until the next         Rosh Chodesh, upon which I will have the option to renew the Shuvah for a later date             (minimum of 2 weeks)

           Rabbi ____ can stop this cycle no matter what, once                 I (if I) had paid any owed Knasot, no matter what. 
}}}


If you have ANY NOTES, please let me more before I go for it.

Layla tov!!

"Sometimes the only Bechira we have is to ask for help"

Maybe you can gain something by following my journey... Or not, whatever works
MY Forum
Last Edit: 27 Apr 2020 02:35 by yosef10.

Re: Lets do this 27 Apr 2020 02:32 #348788

Go for it!

But before you do, I just want to point out one little problem. Ripping up money is a federal crime. Maybe you should just give it to tzedaka instead?

Re: Lets do this 27 Apr 2020 02:41 #348789

  • yosef10
  • OFFLINE
  • Gold Boarder
  • Posts: 210
  • Karma: 12
Thanks, but Hashem has blessed me with a love of Tzedaka, it wouldn't be much of a knas if its something that is meaningful to me, and sometimes even enjoy.

Any other ideas/suggestions?
"Sometimes the only Bechira we have is to ask for help"

Maybe you can gain something by following my journey... Or not, whatever works
MY Forum

Re: Lets do this 27 Apr 2020 03:09 #348792

  • Singularity
  • Current streak: 72 days
  • OFFLINE
  • Platinum Boarder
  • To write, or not to write?
  • Posts: 1507
  • Karma: 79
yosef10 wrote on 27 Apr 2020 02:41:
Thanks, but Hashem has blessed me with a love of Tzedaka, it wouldn't be much of a knas if its something that is meaningful to me, and sometimes even enjoy.

Any other ideas/suggestions?

You can give the money to an anti-charity, like the manchester united fan club, or ISIS, unless Hashem's given you a love for football as well  

But if not, then like I always say, LET IT RIP!!
"Vegeta, what does the scouter say about his sobriety level?"
"... It's over NINE-ZEROOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!"

One day... At A Time :-D


Introduce Yourself and get a free karma point from yours truley!
My Thread

Re: Lets do this 27 Apr 2020 03:14 #348795

  • yosef10
  • OFFLINE
  • Gold Boarder
  • Posts: 210
  • Karma: 12
Also, for anyone else who is still here, this is a link to my old 90 day journey from a couple years ago. It's pretty long, and A LOT has happened since then, and it's been a while (since I actually really commited) so I started a new chat/forum since. Maybe soon Ill update my story over here. https://guardyoureyes.com/forum/19-Introduce-Yourself/312249-I-Need-To-Stop.

Eventually Ill port the old one with he update, for now, here you go.
"Sometimes the only Bechira we have is to ask for help"

Maybe you can gain something by following my journey... Or not, whatever works
MY Forum

Re: Lets do this 27 Apr 2020 18:37 #348836

  • yosef10
  • OFFLINE
  • Gold Boarder
  • Posts: 210
  • Karma: 12
Ill probably get in more trouble with ISIS then ripping it up
"Sometimes the only Bechira we have is to ask for help"

Maybe you can gain something by following my journey... Or not, whatever works
MY Forum

Re: Lets do this 27 Apr 2020 19:50 #348842

  • yosef10
  • OFFLINE
  • Gold Boarder
  • Posts: 210
  • Karma: 12
GOING ON DAY 10!! and it feels great. Was a bit difficult last light, but I took some extra precautions and came out a champion.

Just signed up to have a sponsor/mentor... thinking I can use some extra help with this stuff from someone who's "been there done that".
As of now  I am officially starting the Fortify program today BEZH, gonna proofread taphsic a couple more times and go ahead with that, and also continue writing on the Forum (of course).

Keeping strong and moving on. Have a great day everyone. 
"Sometimes the only Bechira we have is to ask for help"

Maybe you can gain something by following my journey... Or not, whatever works
MY Forum

Re: Lets do this 28 Apr 2020 04:19 #348853

  • Realestatemogul
  • Current streak: 433 days
  • OFFLINE
  • Platinum Boarder
  • Posts: 388
  • Karma: 29
Hey Yosef10!

Keep up the great work! I know it can be hard having to be on zoom all day for yeshiva, but Hashem is testing us all in that area right now and Hashem does not give us tests we can't pass.

As far as ripping up money, I also thought of the same thing! I even did it once, lol. Someone told me off for it and I realized he was right. Hashem gave us mitzvos so we can be productive, not destructive. If in order to do a mitzva we have to be destructive than you have to really think hard about what is going on. 

Food for thought. 
Time to create page: 0.88 seconds

Are you sure?

Yes