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Scientific studies show that it takes 90 days to break an addictive pattern in the mind. Start your own Log of your journey to 90 days! Post here to update us on your status and to give each other chizuk to stay strong!

TOPIC: Chizuk 13555 Views

Re: Chizuk 19 Apr 2015 07:52 #252586

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Do you know of any good poster with that phrase on it? I would love to print it out for my office?

Re: Chizuk 19 Apr 2015 14:41 #252595

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I'm assuming you mean the one in my first post. Heck just type it up in big letters and print it! It speaks for its self !
"To suffer in silence is to suffer alone.
To suffer alone...........well, no one should have to do that."

My Threads
guardyoureyes.com/forum/4-On-the-Way-to-90-Days/251355-Chizuk?limit=15&start=45

Re: Chizuk 19 Apr 2015 14:42 #252596

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It's Sunday. Hashem help........
"To suffer in silence is to suffer alone.
To suffer alone...........well, no one should have to do that."

My Threads
guardyoureyes.com/forum/4-On-the-Way-to-90-Days/251355-Chizuk?limit=15&start=45

Re: Chizuk 21 Apr 2015 02:50 #252723

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Today was the first day back in yeshiva. My learning felt a lot more meaning in a sense that I was really listening to what I was learning.(I guess all the working on giving is paying off) As they say over from the rogitchover "when I daven, I talk to Hashem. When I learn, Hashem talks to me".

Thank you GYE and everyone here.
"To suffer in silence is to suffer alone.
To suffer alone...........well, no one should have to do that."

My Threads
guardyoureyes.com/forum/4-On-the-Way-to-90-Days/251355-Chizuk?limit=15&start=45

Re: Chizuk 21 Apr 2015 04:06 #252740

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Thank you for sharing.

It's great to hear it.
Last Edit: 21 Apr 2015 04:07 by yiraishamaim.

Re: Chizuk 27 Apr 2015 19:04 #253234

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It's been a while since my last post. Been to busy to post....and lust
"To suffer in silence is to suffer alone.
To suffer alone...........well, no one should have to do that."

My Threads
guardyoureyes.com/forum/4-On-the-Way-to-90-Days/251355-Chizuk?limit=15&start=45
Last Edit: 27 Apr 2015 19:05 by TriggerMeNot88.

Re: Chizuk 27 Apr 2015 20:57 #253252

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Busy is good, but stay close!
Much Hatzlacha!

My Threads:
Glad to be here
Don't slip it hurts
Lions & Tigers & Internet, Oh My!

--"ולא המדרש עיקר, אלא המעשה"
--"To promise not to do a thing is the surest way in the world to make a body want to go and do that very thing." Mark Twain
--"If, when you honestly want to, you find you cannot quit entirely, or if when drinking (or lusting), you have little control over the amount you take, you are probably alcoholic (or sexaholic)." AA Big Book P. 45. Parenthesis added.
--You hit rock bottom when you decide to stop digging.

Re: Chizuk 14 May 2015 03:13 #254651

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Hit 60 today!!! Can't remember last time I went this long.

My therapist told me I don't need to see him anymore, I seem to have acquired what I need to live my life with who I am in a healthy manner. Go me!!

Sorry I haven't posted much, but during the zman it gets really busy. Plus my partner(GYE emailing one) and I have been in contact a lot lately, so I've been getting what I need out of GYE from him.(mainly to have someone who is non judgemental to talk to about these matters)
But my therapist did say to keep on using GYE. So here I am using it!
Thanx for listenin.
"To suffer in silence is to suffer alone.
To suffer alone...........well, no one should have to do that."

My Threads
guardyoureyes.com/forum/4-On-the-Way-to-90-Days/251355-Chizuk?limit=15&start=45

Re: Chizuk 14 May 2015 05:17 #254662

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I like your positive attitude!
Much Hatzlacha!

My Threads:
Glad to be here
Don't slip it hurts
Lions & Tigers & Internet, Oh My!

--"ולא המדרש עיקר, אלא המעשה"
--"To promise not to do a thing is the surest way in the world to make a body want to go and do that very thing." Mark Twain
--"If, when you honestly want to, you find you cannot quit entirely, or if when drinking (or lusting), you have little control over the amount you take, you are probably alcoholic (or sexaholic)." AA Big Book P. 45. Parenthesis added.
--You hit rock bottom when you decide to stop digging.

Re: Chizuk 14 May 2015 11:42 #254673

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TriggerMeNot88 wrote:
Hit 60 today!!! Can't remember last time I went this long.

My therapist told me I don't need to see him anymore, I seem to have acquired what I need to live my life with who I am in a healthy manner. Go me!!

Sorry I haven't posted much, but during the zman it gets really busy. Plus my partner(GYE emailing one) and I have been in contact a lot lately, so I've been getting what I need out of GYE from him.(mainly to have someone who is non judgemental to talk to about these matters)
But my therapist did say to keep on using GYE. So here I am using it!
Thanx for listenin.


Kudos to you!
everyone's different.
thank God my therapist didn't say that when I hit 60 once, twice, thrice, frice.....
My email: thenewme613@hotmail.com
My threads: Mikvah Night - Page 1Page 2Page 3Last Page

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Re: Chizuk 14 May 2015 17:31 #254700

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Just to clarify, my therapist had no idea it was day 60 for me.
"To suffer in silence is to suffer alone.
To suffer alone...........well, no one should have to do that."

My Threads
guardyoureyes.com/forum/4-On-the-Way-to-90-Days/251355-Chizuk?limit=15&start=45

Re: Chizuk 07 Jun 2015 23:46 #256301

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TriggerMeNot88 wrote:
So a couple of nights ago I had this talk with my wife about love without lust I was tellin her what my therapist said about it how SA says an addict has used and abused the privilege to lust for his wife. So we talked about it for a while, then it hit me, I've read about it, but I felt it that night. I was gripped with this fear, a realization that if I continue like this I will never experience that forbidden ecstasy again. I literally got sick to the stomach. I was pacing the floor like a mad man. My wife kept asking if I'm ok. I didn't know what to do. I thought a lot about my resolve to do this. I kept telling myself about all the pain that comes along with that pleasure. Thought a lot about my wife and kids(Hashem should bench them). After about half an hour I calmed down. Whew!
Well thanks for listening. Il try and post more about me. It helps.


Wow. Just read this post. So beautiful. Because I remember going through the same thing once, in ~1992. I had (of course) just finished porning and mastirbating myself somewhere and was in the street in front of a shul and the thought came to me clearly of a bochur who was killed in a car accident on a holiday and I felt so sorry for him, wished I could help him out...you know, that special spiritually sensitive way we often feel soon after the ___ hits the fan and we feel sorry for acting out our lusts and feel we never, ever EVER want to go back...well, I stood and gave up schmutz in this boy's zechus right then and there!

....

....

It wasn't two minutes, till I was gripped by this horrible panic you describe: What? Never feel it again? That sweet softness, the colors on the paper, the scene with that stuff that I love so much?! How can it be? How will I ever survive?!

And I promptly gave up the idea of giving it up, even for this poor, dead boy.

I was crestfallen - and carried that shame with me for the next 5 years until I was ready to surrender the fight and give up my right to lust, in other words, joined SA and attended meetings, got a sponsor, shared openly in meetings (there were only two frum Jews in SA in my town back then and they were - of course - both crazy ) and got sober; and b"H have not needed to have sex with myself or with anyone else since, one day at a time and the easy way.

You have far more support than I did then.

Your wife, of course, will not save you from anything. But you are not alone in recovery and not even alone at home. That's a brocha. I was alone at home, and my wife hated SA and my neetings and international conferences and frum SA shabbatons, and everything about them...yet today she admits that all the good in our life grows from my sobriety.

She once told me (around 11th anniversary in SA and 22nd in marriage) that the two happiest days of her life are the day we got married and the day I got sober (even though felt she hated me deeply at that time...[not the married one, the sober one, knucklehead!]) - and that the day I got sober was the greater of the two.

Things change if you stick with the right things.
"Off the 18-wheeler and fine on this tricycle!", "I do not particularly care exactly which "lav" suicide is. I'm not interested in it for other reasons...and you are probably the same."

Re: Chizuk 08 Jun 2015 02:42 #256304

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Thanks for your shares guys.
Much Hatzlacha!

My Threads:
Glad to be here
Don't slip it hurts
Lions & Tigers & Internet, Oh My!

--"ולא המדרש עיקר, אלא המעשה"
--"To promise not to do a thing is the surest way in the world to make a body want to go and do that very thing." Mark Twain
--"If, when you honestly want to, you find you cannot quit entirely, or if when drinking (or lusting), you have little control over the amount you take, you are probably alcoholic (or sexaholic)." AA Big Book P. 45. Parenthesis added.
--You hit rock bottom when you decide to stop digging.

Re: Chizuk 14 Jun 2015 03:36 #256763

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My feelings on reaching 90(haven't gone this long since I married, I think)

I feel strong, for I have conquered my wants until now.
I feel content and honored, for I have my wife and children.
I feel empowered, for I have acquired the tools I need to live a truly torah'dik(sane) life, and learning how to use them more every day.
And yet I am nothing for I have begun to have no will.....


Feels friggin awesome!!!!!
"To suffer in silence is to suffer alone.
To suffer alone...........well, no one should have to do that."

My Threads
guardyoureyes.com/forum/4-On-the-Way-to-90-Days/251355-Chizuk?limit=15&start=45

Re: Chizuk 14 Jun 2015 04:18 #256765

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Mazel Tov! Mazel Tov!
Much Hatzlacha!

My Threads:
Glad to be here
Don't slip it hurts
Lions & Tigers & Internet, Oh My!

--"ולא המדרש עיקר, אלא המעשה"
--"To promise not to do a thing is the surest way in the world to make a body want to go and do that very thing." Mark Twain
--"If, when you honestly want to, you find you cannot quit entirely, or if when drinking (or lusting), you have little control over the amount you take, you are probably alcoholic (or sexaholic)." AA Big Book P. 45. Parenthesis added.
--You hit rock bottom when you decide to stop digging.
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