Thanks for the advice and support.

I'm gonna keep at it as is, keep posting, and make changes as needed if needed..

Much love

She can be supportive and encouraging without being your Mashgiach. Having her looking over your shoulder all the time would be very uncomfortable for both of you.

My wife is fully aware of my issues, and I made up with her that if I had a major fall I would tell her, but i don't share all my daily challenges and struggles with her, except once in a while when I might tell her that i need to avoid or get away from a triggering situation.

I'm hearing.

I find right now that eblaster with the reports being sent to my wife is very effective. Every time there is a temptation, even the possibility that she might check that email really wakes me back up to sanity... She's cool with it as well.

Humbling as it is to accept my perception of Gd is such a joke

Still going strong, Praise the Lrd for you guys

Much love

For some....that is a good workin' fix.

Keep at it.

b'hatzlachah

Just to add a little spice and some old Dov style talk.

The disadvantage of having ones wife as the person that we "open up" to is that the problem that I have is that I don't want to accept myself entirely. I don't want to have to face who i really am and deal with it as such. So I live a double life, one on the outside and one on the inside.

The solution to that is being honest with others, but to be honest in my own little circle where those people that I am telling are also scared to tell the truth to the world, would just be a way of appeasing myself while allowing me to still hide in the rest of my life.

In order for me to really face reality, I need to be honest with others, others who don't hide with me, others who look at me from the outside. Of course they need to be safe and preferably understanding, but to keep it in hiding is only feeding the addiction and giving way to use opportunities if they happen to arise.

Just an idea, I'm not saying that that's the way it is in your case.

KOMT brother!!!

StonerDan wrote:

Brings to mind the Gemara (was it R' Yochanan?) where he gave his talmidim a bracha that their fear of heaven should be as great as their fear of other people.
Talmidim: That's all?
Rebbe: U'l'vai! (If only!)

Still sane. Longest five days of my life! And I feel great about myself.

Wishing the whole world The Lrds clarity, and a wonderful week of blessing and cleanliness from all idiocy.

Much love

I'm finding the 90 day chart extremely helpful, each time I see my days done, and the little badge etc, makes me feel really good.

Thanks again to this amazing website, till now I've always simply lacked the incentive and framework to really get a hold on this issue.

Just make sure you are taking it one day at a time.

Thanks for the advice dms I will remember that.

We have all been sick. Its been quite heavy. Very hard, very humbling. I'm really struggling. At times its very inspiring, appreciative etc. Its also heartbreaking.

Can't go into too many details..

One of the many positives is how it can help me stay sober, if I humble myself to the situation and not 'rebel'.

Any prayers are very welcome

Much love

Yesterday...
StonerDan wrote:


Today...
StonerDan wrote:


What is goin' on? [with the details or without; either way...some clarity would help]

b'hatzlachah

Hey SD,

Just wanted to let you know that you inspire me with these posts.

KUTGW

cordnoy wrote:


We all got sick quite suddenly. It didn't hit me hard till last night.

Bigmoish wrote:


that is so extremely helpful for me, thanks so so much Moish

What do you mean by 'we' and 'sick'?

Can't help if you talk in riddles.

whatever it is, your posts are mostly filled with inspirin' and refreshin' words and thoughts.

May whatever you are goin' thru be a quick one.

b'hatzlachah