ZemirosShabbos wrote:


Something happened in middle of it!! My processor couldn't handle it's magnitude. Can you send me a smaller file? Something that doesn't take up all of the CPU please, (that way I can still use some to watch other things )

I had an insight this morning, (during davening of course)

I'm not sure which came first, the lusting because I hate flying or hating flying because of all the lusting (causing an awesome cycle).

Also, I have not surrendered, and accepted, to go through the flying experience without lusting! I was thinking about wearing my glasses instead of contacts so that I could take them off during the trip. It's a really nice thought, but that's all it is, a thought, and if you read through my last trip....I thought about it then as well. But that's all it stayed as, a thought, even though I told my wife the thought, it was still just a thought.

If I don't make a decision, I'm not gonna do it.

Now, with the hakdmah earlier, there is something profound about the second option, something rings true. I may have very well associated travelling with lusting!! If that is the case, then I'd have to make a conscious decision not to heed to that association, just like all the rest of my triggers which are also just associations. That would make everything so simple! It's not really the stress, it's much more the whiteknuckling that I go through every time!!

So that would make for a simple plan! Surrender! Give up the idea that you lust in the airport, and on the plane, etc!!

Obviously, I need to stay as far away as possible, but the mindset is completely different!! OMG!!

So I will be taking off my glasses, bli neder, but not to handcuff myself, when I really want to look, rather because I'd rather stay away from wanting to look! If I do notice something, it doesn't have to be "uch, I can't stand it, if I see it then I have to have it...but I can't!!", it can be "it's ok to have desires and not give into them, let's just continue with life!"

Thank you so much everybody!! KOMT!!!

Any more ideas are more than welcome, although I may not use them

הנני בזה להודות ולהלל בשער בת רבים
לרב האי גאון והאי עניו איש אשר כלבבי
הלא הוא ר' יענקל
Fe.Day.N.Y.
אשר לקח מזמנו והועיל בטובו להיות אוזן שומעת וממנו עצה ותושיה בעת שהייתי מרגיש עצמי כמו BLOCKD
והצילני משיני האריה ויעמידני בקרן אורה לשתות מיץ בננה לרויה

So that would make for a simple plan! Surrender! Give up the idea that you lust in the airport, and on the plane, etc!! r.y.p

please share this one with us. give up the idea??? like, together with the laugauge, by the desk??? HOW do you JUST give it up???

by the way, i do share the lust-traveling association. in my case, i think that when i travel, i need to look my best...and this is a kind of trigger.

what worked for me, is the thinking, that i'm too precious and holy to enjoy looking at immodest things, and i am in my own world, too remote to be touched by people who act like animals.

[quote="Pidaini" post=236205]TehillimZugger wrote:


The word is "bears", like Dov

Enjoy your flight!

They picked da wrong guy to block or lock; goodness!

[All da thinkers (as a compliment) will say that it's a lesson from the One Above that we are not in control, and we shouldn't have expectations, and it's not "our way or no way," and He is runnin' everythin', and if it doesn't work out perfect to execution it'll also be o.k., etc.]

NML!

b'hatzlachah

lavi wrote:


First of all, R' Lavi to quote someone put in the following "[quote="username"]" in the beginning [and "[/quote]" at the end.

Now to the point, not together with the luggage, way before that!!

I wrote about my experience with surrender over here, but it would be certainly be productive for me to elaborate here as well for myself.

I figured, that the reason why I get so worn out of travelling is because of a simple association that I made. That is that I fight lust, and a lot of it, when I travel. SO obviously, if the whole trip is fighting, and losing, then I'm gonna be exhausted at the end of it, and not happy in the least!

So the answer is, do what I did with all other triggers, and all other desires! I have learned that IT IS OK TO DESIRE, to want to look again, or even to have a thought about sex! That doesn't mean that I am falling, that the world is coming to an end, that I have to give in to look again and think about it and unless it goes away, I'm gonna give into it!

I can have a desire, and say "ok, that's a nice desire, I don't need to fulfill it"! I can ask Hashem to help me continue to give them up, instead of holding onto them and fighting them!!

Wonder of wonders!! I'm feeling much much more calm about the trip!!! It's amazing!! THANK YOU HASHEM!!! Please Help me to remember this, and to do the things that I can to continuously remind myself of it!!

Thank You GYE!!!

I had a nasty slip today, it wasn't cause of the trip, persay, although I for sure had a little voice telling me that this happens by trips (see, told you it's just an association!!).

Anyway, I changed my filter down a level because I need a lower level for when I travel and my wife will be using this computer, and I needed a program while I was abroad that would only work on the lower level. I downloaded the program.....and IT DIDN'T WORK!!!

That's one of my worst triggers, when my computer doesn't do things that it's supposed to. So now that the filter was lower, and I know some loopholes then, I used them. It was more than I wish to admit, certainly acting out on lust.

It's good to know that I am so flimsy, and I am in middle of changing one of the big loopholes as we type.

Thanks for letting me be honest!!

And Mr. No More Locking, right after I realized what triggered me, I was thinking of what cordnoy wrote:

Maybe I am not one to talk, but there is way to much thinking going on over here. Got to dumb it down a bit boys.

Says the one who just wrote the same exact thing on his thread.......just in much less words!

Ok, Ok, maybe not. But one point there was the same, the one of association.

Pidaini wrote:


Now you are getting it. :D

My brain shuts down after the first 50 words.

MBJ wrote:
.

er..guys...
i'm kinda stuck
i'm really thinking about too much thinking...and don't think i know how to stop thinking about thinking, i think it doesn't bother me to think (it kinda free, you know),but i think that if someone else thinks different, that is also a reason to think, so what do you think?

Super!
Somebody else against thinkin'!!

yeah.
excellect idea.
how did you think of it?