So, yesterday was supposed to see us having grilled chicken for supper. This meant that the hubby makes it. Which is always annoying, because 1- wives are supposed to make suppers. Not husbands. (Right?) 2- she claims that she’s nervous around our grill pan- and that’s why she wants me to do it. Grouch-worthy enough. But I had a rough time at my last job and got home late and had to run to mincha after showering (I came home quite yucky smelling and feeling). So my supper consisted of leftover rice from before the fast. (Which was a grouch in it’s own right. ע׳ my last grouch.) 

When I spoke to my wife in the phone earlier today, I recommended that we should just bake the chicken, so that she would make them herself it would be easier all around, and she agreed. 

Fast forward to pre-supper time, and my son trips and falls flat on  his face, receiving a nice scratch by his nose. Nu. But y’all know what that means- I get home and NOTHING is ready!!!!



And did I mention that the baby is still teething like a hatter? And he has a cold now. 





Oh, and have I mentioned the family of mice that have decided to share their home with us?

Wow, great stuff! Food, job, kids, wife!

And it is great that the mice are generous and sharing!

Not sure if your appreciative post should be allowed here.

Dear women of this bungalow colony that I'm visiting,
Why do you need makeup and a 3 ft long shaitel just to walk to the pool? 

(Their response)
Mr BH,
This is our home. We don't know who you are and neither do we care to. Mind your own darn business!

And of course they are right. 
Harumph.

Anyone here ever set out to do a deep car cleaning from all the cheerios, pretzels, veggie straws, old bottles etc. Only to end up getting a hidden crumpled up sucked up by a ravenous commercial vaccum??

Yesterday morning I get some crackers with which to have my leftover herring from shabbos. Remembered to leave the crackers in the car, forgot the herring. Harrumph. 

tzitzis dude wrote on 22 Aug 2024 11:26:

Language!

Pretty sharp! 

Actually, I'm so sorry to hear how sad your day was. I didn't understand what you meant about leaving the crackers or herring in the car. You mean you forgot to bring the herring?

I hate when that happens. Sorry, words fail me here.

I feel I really get you on this. 

frank.lee wrote on 22 Aug 2024 12:55:

The herring stayed in the fridge at home, all lonely, while my crackers were keeping me company.

I won't say at least you will have a chance to enjoy the herring another time, you did not leave then in the car and they got rotten.

But I suppose you finished then by the end of Shabbos. Ahhh, yummy!

But it is sad because now they are gone! Just like all transient pleasures, as we consume them, it is bittersweet for us, because they are dissipating and then gone. 

The opposite of real pleasure, from doing Mitzvos and learning Torah!!

Ftr, I heard this thought in the name of the Magid of Dubno...

After Shabbos my wife calls her mother. "Shabbos was great. BH I had a nap."

I mean, yeah, Hashem is always watching our kids . . . but I was there too.

If you're looking for me, I'll be in the refrigerator 

Ever since I was old enough to understand the lyrics, I felt shortchanged and misunderstood by the good people of Anshei Kartoffel.

Every Shabbos there's a kiddush in shul, with cake and a glazele schnapps.
A shtikele herring for the older folks while the kids get lollipops.

Okay, firstly, this sounds like a cheap kiddush, nothing to brag about in a song. And secondly, I appreciated herring while my peers were still seduced by a lollipop.

I understand I'm not a kid anymore, but I doubt the older folk would count me as one of their own yet. That only happens when enough of them die, and we become the majority. So, where does that leave me? Having cake with a glazele schnapps? I can imagine what type of schnapps they offer there. Probably "When Old Williamsburg Was Young".

Naturally, I started my own kiddush club, and now I get nasty glares from the older folk while I valiantly chase away the kids (with their lollipops), keeping them from plundering my festivity.

I feel as out of place as Chanania Yom Tov Lipa Katzenellenbogenstein.

BenHashemBH wrote on 25 Aug 2024 02:21:

You're stam a kvetch . When she said BH, wasnt she just referring to your user name?

redfaced wrote on 28 Aug 2024 16:01:

Only if someone spilled the Bertie Bott's Every Flavor Beans. 

My wife was sitting next to me and picked up my phone and was idly scrolling through (yeah, idk why either). She sees my call history and starts laughing, "who are all these guys with the weird names"? 

I previously told her I was on GYE to mentor people, so mumbled that they were guys who were speaking to me for help. 

Meanwhile I was waiting to see if she opened the google voice app (where I do all my gye texting). If I saw she was going for that my plan was to disembowel myself on the couch as a distraction.

chosemyshem wrote on 28 Aug 2024 18:31:

God, I hope it's not a velvet couch.