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trying to refind motivation 19 Aug 2024 23:23 #419449

sammysmith
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Hey I know this may sound cliche'. Ive been really stuck with no motivation whatsoever. I really had no motivation for yideshkeit at all but BH with therapy and revisiting some false ideas I had about Hashem I have been feeling more positive and motivated about everything else. But in the area of porn, I just dont feel motivated to stop and in a way I feel resigned to my fate. Thanks for listening.

Re: trying to refind motivation 20 Aug 2024 00:28 #419452

vehkam
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sammysmith wrote on 19 Aug 2024 23:23:

If you could choose your fate what would it be?

vehkam7@gmail.com

guardyoureyes.com/forum/4-On-the-Way-to-90-Days/375452-Work-in-progress

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some of the experiences I write about may make it easier to identify me. This is ok. I trust that if anyone discovers my identity they will keep it to themselves. If you do realize that you know me, I am completely comfortable and welcome you acknowledging me and my struggle in person.

Re: trying to refind motivation 20 Aug 2024 01:53 #419453

sammysmith OFFLINE Fresh Boarder Posts: 9 Karma: 0	I love that question. Do you mean general fate or in this area?

Re: trying to refind motivation 20 Aug 2024 04:17 #419461

vehkam
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sammysmith wrote on 20 Aug 2024 01:53:

I love that question. Do you mean general fate or in this area?

In this area.

Re: trying to refind motivation 20 Aug 2024 16:33 #419492

sammysmith OFFLINE Fresh Boarder Posts: 9 Karma: 0	My fate would be to not watch at porn at all. I know thats the right thing.

Re: trying to refind motivation 20 Aug 2024 16:41 #419493

chosemyshem
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sammysmith wrote on 20 Aug 2024 16:33:

My fate would be to not watch at porn at all. I know thats the right thing.

Know or feel? Sometimes if we "know" one thing but don't feel it to be true it doesn't help much. If you're on here at all you clearly have some desire to change, and I honestly don't believe you have to be dead set on changing to start changing, but if you just want to watch porn but have some vague idea that it's not healthy or G-ds gonna smite you it's gonna be a tough ride.

Why don't you check out the Flight 2 Freedom program (link in my signature). The first section has some really great exercises to help you sit down and work out why you want to change. Doing that (and then reviewing when needed) can help you with motivation.

Links: TBOTG (and a peirush); F2F Program; Hall of Fame thread; Dov's 12 Step Workshop recordings; Welcome New Members; Muttel's Bochur Schmooze; The Easy-Peasy book; The Big Book (a pdf version) (and the White); Markz's compilation thread; Accountability relationships;
Me: My trip. Please feel free to reach out.
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Re: trying to refind motivation 20 Aug 2024 17:57 #419496

vehkam
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sammysmith wrote on 20 Aug 2024 16:33:

My fate would be to not watch at porn at all. I know thats the right thing.

so it is clear to you that if you could choose you would choose to be free of porn? it that is accurate, it would be helpful to identify some choices that you can make that will lead in that direction....

Re: trying to refind motivation 20 Aug 2024 22:33 #419526

sammysmith OFFLINE Fresh Boarder Posts: 9 Karma: 0	I have done a lot of the exercises at a different stage of my life but none of what previously motivate me works.