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TOPIC: Aiming to be better. Introducing myself :) 11902 Views

Re: Aiming to be better. Introducing myself :) 08 Feb 2021 03:36 #362909

Just reached 7 days Baruch Hashem without Him this wouldn't be possible.

situation at home is crazy. leaving this coming elul for eretz yisrael and while I love my family it will be infinitely easier without the added stress of being at home surrounded by constant fighting. That doesn't mean I can stop fighting though.

Thinking about our purpose here in the world - ask someone who has lived out their years and they will tell you life flies by fast. Whats the use of filling this time with shmutz? We go up to shamayim and its all worthless. I'm already almost 20 years old and be'ezras Hashem until 120 which means already lived a sixth of my life - it goes by fast. Doing my best to try to maximize the gifts that the Ribbono shel olam has given me in this world in the time that I have left to become the best me I can be and not to give in to the yetzer hara.

One day at a time.
Think about how good you'll feel if you say no to desire and compare that to how bad you'll feel if you say yes.

Desire is unique in the way that it is never fulfilled -  if you give in the desire comes back even more powerful in just a few days. Telling yourself that its ok because this is really the last time doesn't work because you are just adding new images to your head that will cause future falls.

The Joy of triumph over the yetzer hara is worth the effort it takes to win. It IS worth it! Keep fighting!

My thread: 
Aiming to be better

Feel free to contact me at evedhashem1836@gmail.com

Re: Aiming to be better. Introducing myself :) 08 Feb 2021 04:23 #362910

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Wow! You are a huge inspiration! 
My threads:
Giving it another shot

One step at a time

Daily (I hope) Excerpt from Sefer Zos Brisi

I am going to beat this monster one step at a time... One day at a time!

Re: Aiming to be better. Introducing myself :) 08 Feb 2021 19:31 #362941

Wanted to publicly praise "The Fight" from The Shmuz (its in someone's signature if people are looking i think the person is Markz)

- great advice
- great Torah
- great feeling when u finish the shiur and you hear the music at the end

In other words....

Highly recommended!
Think about how good you'll feel if you say no to desire and compare that to how bad you'll feel if you say yes.

Desire is unique in the way that it is never fulfilled -  if you give in the desire comes back even more powerful in just a few days. Telling yourself that its ok because this is really the last time doesn't work because you are just adding new images to your head that will cause future falls.

The Joy of triumph over the yetzer hara is worth the effort it takes to win. It IS worth it! Keep fighting!

My thread: 
Aiming to be better

Feel free to contact me at evedhashem1836@gmail.com

Re: Aiming to be better. Introducing myself :) 09 Feb 2021 15:08 #363003

שמונה מי יודע? שמונה אני יודע - שמונה ימי מילה

 Reached milestone of 8 days! I think there is actually some similarities between our struggles and the milah - as we see by shchem (i think) its the hardest not right in the beginning but on the third day - in the beginning its not as hard to have the strength coming off of a fall - our resolves are strong and we promise ourselves over and over that was the last time - and NO MORE. yet once we get further on, to the "third day" , it isn't so easy anymore and we might slip up. We just got to get back on the horse and keep fighting. 

Also on a separate note YouTube is mamish crazy you can go on there for a clean purpose like a Jewish song or a chess video (I am a huge chess guy if anyone ever wants to play anonymously lmk and we can make it happen) but its so easy to get distracted and look at things that are triggering. Probably better to just not go on at all

Wishing hatzlocha to everyone in their journeys,

EvedHashem
Think about how good you'll feel if you say no to desire and compare that to how bad you'll feel if you say yes.

Desire is unique in the way that it is never fulfilled -  if you give in the desire comes back even more powerful in just a few days. Telling yourself that its ok because this is really the last time doesn't work because you are just adding new images to your head that will cause future falls.

The Joy of triumph over the yetzer hara is worth the effort it takes to win. It IS worth it! Keep fighting!

My thread: 
Aiming to be better

Feel free to contact me at evedhashem1836@gmail.com

Re: Aiming to be better. Introducing myself :) 09 Feb 2021 15:17 #363005

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EvedHashem1836 wrote on 09 Feb 2021 15:08:

שמונה מי יודע? שמונה אני יודע - שמונה ימי מילה

 Reached milestone of 8 days! I think there is actually some similarities between our struggles and the milah - as we see by shchem (i think) its the hardest not right in the beginning but on the third day - in the beginning its not as hard to have the strength coming off of a fall - our resolves are strong and we promise ourselves over and over that was the last time - and NO MORE. yet once we get further on, to the "third day" , it isn't so easy anymore and we might slip up. We just got to get back on the horse and keep fighting. 

Also on a separate note YouTube is mamish crazy you can go on there for a clean purpose like a Jewish song or a chess video (I am a huge chess guy if anyone ever wants to play anonymously lmk and we can make it happen) but its so easy to get distracted and look at things that are triggering. Probably better to just not go on at all

Wishing hatzlocha to everyone in their journeys,

EvedHashem


Great comparison!
YESOD stands for Yiddish Entertainment Sites Only Defense. Even with a filter, if we spend our time on non-Jewish news and entertainment websites, we’re bound to see many things we shouldn’t. And one thing leads to another. Spending time on sites like Youtube, Facebook, Instagram (or even news sites like CNN and Fox News) are risky. It’s inevitable that we’ll stumble in shmiras einayim. B"h there are enough frum websites to keep us occupied when we need a break (like YWN or Matzav or VIN).
"If I am not for myself, who will be for me? But if I am only for myself, who am I? If not now, when?"
feel free to reach out @  ahavayirah@gmail.com

Re: Aiming to be better. Introducing myself :) 09 Feb 2021 15:43 #363007

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DavidT wrote on 09 Feb 2021 15:17:

EvedHashem1836 wrote on 09 Feb 2021 15:08:

שמונה מי יודע? שמונה אני יודע - שמונה ימי מילה

 Reached milestone of 8 days! I think there is actually some similarities between our struggles and the milah - as we see by shchem (i think) its the hardest not right in the beginning but on the third day - in the beginning its not as hard to have the strength coming off of a fall - our resolves are strong and we promise ourselves over and over that was the last time - and NO MORE. yet once we get further on, to the "third day" , it isn't so easy anymore and we might slip up. We just got to get back on the horse and keep fighting. 

Also on a separate note YouTube is mamish crazy you can go on there for a clean purpose like a Jewish song or a chess video (I am a huge chess guy if anyone ever wants to play anonymously lmk and we can make it happen) but its so easy to get distracted and look at things that are triggering. Probably better to just not go on at all

Wishing hatzlocha to everyone in their journeys,

EvedHashem


Great comparison!
YESOD stands for Yiddish Entertainment Sites Only Defense. Even with a filter, if we spend our time on non-Jewish news and entertainment websites, we’re bound to see many things we shouldn’t. And one thing leads to another. Spending time on sites like Youtube, Facebook, Instagram (or even news sites like CNN and Fox News) are risky. It’s inevitable that we’ll stumble in shmiras einayim. B"h there are enough frum websites to keep us occupied when we need a break (like YWN or Matzav or VIN).

Lately even those sites are becoming more lax on the Shmiras Einayim front.
!אנא עבדא דקודשא בריך הוא

וּבְיָדְךָ כֹּחַ וּגְבוּרָה וּבְיָדְךָ לְגַדֵּל וּלְחַזֵּק לַכֹּל


"If it would be so easy there wouldn't be a GYE, but if it would be impossible there also wouldn't be a GYE."
"Sometimes a hard decision leads to an easier outcome."
- General Grant


My story: guardyoureyes.com/forum/19-Introduce-Yourself/111583-hello-my-friends

Re: Aiming to be better. Introducing myself :) 09 Feb 2021 15:47 #363008

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Gevura Shebyesod wrote on 09 Feb 2021 15:43:
Lately even those sites are becoming more lax on the Shmiras Einayim front.

Yes, that is very true. It ain't easy to be a true yirei shamayim... 
"If I am not for myself, who will be for me? But if I am only for myself, who am I? If not now, when?"
feel free to reach out @  ahavayirah@gmail.com

Re: Aiming to be better. Introducing myself :) 09 Feb 2021 16:54 #363010

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I use a few image blockers, but they'd probably be willing to listen to complaints.

Re: Aiming to be better. Introducing myself :) 09 Feb 2021 19:37 #363024

Deleted
Think about how good you'll feel if you say no to desire and compare that to how bad you'll feel if you say yes.

Desire is unique in the way that it is never fulfilled -  if you give in the desire comes back even more powerful in just a few days. Telling yourself that its ok because this is really the last time doesn't work because you are just adding new images to your head that will cause future falls.

The Joy of triumph over the yetzer hara is worth the effort it takes to win. It IS worth it! Keep fighting!

My thread: 
Aiming to be better

Feel free to contact me at evedhashem1836@gmail.com
Last Edit: 25 Apr 2021 19:22 by EvedHashem1836.

Re: Aiming to be better. Introducing myself :) 09 Feb 2021 20:35 #363028

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EvedHashem1836 wrote on 09 Feb 2021 15:08:



Also on a separate note YouTube is mamish crazy you can go on there for a clean purpose like a Jewish song or a chess video (I am a huge chess guy if anyone ever wants to play anonymously lmk and we can make it happen) but its so easy to get distracted and look at things that are triggering. Probably better to just not go on at all

Wishing hatzlocha to everyone in their journeys,

EvedHashem


There is a site called Gruntig that posts Jewish music videos and other videos of interest. If there is anything not tznius in a video (presidential inauguration etc) they do a pretty good job at covering it up. It is great for the entertainment down time. My filter won't allow me to go from there to Youtube or Vimeo but if you don't have that set up like that it can lead to problems. It can also be a huge waste of time,but one step at a time!
Hatzlocha

Re: Aiming to be better. Introducing myself :) 10 Feb 2021 05:05 #363068

Was literally about to fall and look inapropriate things up on the internet which would have led to me acting out but I pushed myself to at least before that write down on a sheet of paper a pro/con list and it saved me.

When you feel an urge see if you can think rationally- if so it makes sense to make a pro/con list and once u do you realize what you almost did but stop yourself
Think about how good you'll feel if you say no to desire and compare that to how bad you'll feel if you say yes.

Desire is unique in the way that it is never fulfilled -  if you give in the desire comes back even more powerful in just a few days. Telling yourself that its ok because this is really the last time doesn't work because you are just adding new images to your head that will cause future falls.

The Joy of triumph over the yetzer hara is worth the effort it takes to win. It IS worth it! Keep fighting!

My thread: 
Aiming to be better

Feel free to contact me at evedhashem1836@gmail.com

Re: Aiming to be better. Introducing myself :) 10 Feb 2021 12:19 #363080

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That's awesome advice. I've thought about pros and cons and it has helped me to an extent. I'll try actually writing them out the next challenge that comes up. Thanks!

Re: Aiming to be better. Introducing myself :) 11 Feb 2021 01:05 #363115

I think its just as important to post about your victories as is it to post about your failures

Got a invite to text on Skype from some random person (and from the profile picture it was a good looking girl) and almost hit accept and would have likely been a fall but made a split second decision to not go into that. Feels incredible. BezH more victories to come!

Closing in on 10 days BH
Think about how good you'll feel if you say no to desire and compare that to how bad you'll feel if you say yes.

Desire is unique in the way that it is never fulfilled -  if you give in the desire comes back even more powerful in just a few days. Telling yourself that its ok because this is really the last time doesn't work because you are just adding new images to your head that will cause future falls.

The Joy of triumph over the yetzer hara is worth the effort it takes to win. It IS worth it! Keep fighting!

My thread: 
Aiming to be better

Feel free to contact me at evedhashem1836@gmail.com

Re: Aiming to be better. Introducing myself :) 11 Feb 2021 01:59 #363117

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EvedHashem1836 wrote on 11 Feb 2021 01:05:
I think its just as important to post about your victories as is it to post about your failures

Got a invite to text on Skype from some random person (and from the profile picture it was a good looking girl) and almost hit accept and would have likely been a fall but made a split second decision to not go into that. Feels incredible. BezH more victories to come!

Closing in on 10 days BH

If I may disagree...
posting about your victories is far more important than posting about your failures... not only for yourself but for the sake of your fellow gye friends...
keep it up! 
"If I am not for myself, who will be for me? But if I am only for myself, who am I? If not now, when?"
feel free to reach out @  ahavayirah@gmail.com

Re: Aiming to be better. Introducing myself :) 11 Feb 2021 02:00 #363118

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Amazing! Congrats! Make sure to treat yourself, its important to feel proud of accomplishments.
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