It's nice to actually post (although I have been checking this site weekly) 
so first I would like to thank me dear Chaver(im) to whom I must shout out and say a Big Thank You, who never rejected me and never got angry at me they always found time for me (saying that I must say that they strengthened my Emuna in Hashem, well if say can say Hi to me, the Ribono Shel Olem definitely can and does so everyday 3 times a day to check on me amongs other things how I'm coping with this nisayon; the prayer before i sin to say hi I hope u stand through this and if not don't go insane and bury urself in guilt and the prayer after i fall telling me he still loves me and loves my mitzvahs, I should look at myself and be proud that I'm moving forward  (well if a bosor vdam could tell me this the infinite can do it in a more true loving way) and checking on my stability if I'm still feeling OK) and say Hi to all there, since I have joined the gue forum community BH the intensity and frequency of watching p.. And acting out (which I only do with watching p..) has lessened.
i wanted to ask a personal question, I feel that posting my the amount of days on the chart does me more harm than good, it's not because that i need to reset it when i fall, bc I don't think anyone is looking besides for me;) but bc  it send me a message that so many days past since last fall so maybe the nisayon is behind me and I believe that can cause me to fall? Those are my thoughts tell me what u think?

I think if that’s how you feel, then run with it. Meaning take the days down if you’d like. On the other hand, make sure it doesn’t give you license in some way to act out.

Can the chevrah please  share some  advice, as to what worked for them to cope with the nisayon on the Yom Tov time of the year?

Most important is to be aware that yom tov and motzai yom tov can be triggering and not to panic when and if urges arise. The thought "How can this happen with such holy days?!" is demoralizing and debilitating. Just knowing that, being prepared and staying calm is half the yeshua. Secondly, many of us have difficulty processing emotional highs. When they are over we itch for the release. Some heavy physical work, a good jog, or similar exercise can replace "other ways" we trained to release in the past. Hatzlocha.

Michael94 wrote on 17 Sep 2018 05:16:

I quit doing tshuva for my sex addiction. I know it's counterintuitive, but the addiction is caused by the philosophy that the acting out classifies you as a reject of society. That's why it feels like you can't stop. Because as long as you feel like that it's not your fault and you get to continue.

mzl wrote on 17 Sep 2018 12:18:

II agree strongly with the first sentence. (I don't know enough about the remainder of the post to venture an opinion.) The seforim say like this as well. The books also do. Step zero is to stop! Repentance can come at a later date. Wallowin' in pity can keep us in the same rut.

Godspeed!

HeyJust a comment on the title of the thread. a Lot of people find this site helpful, when they are going through hard times, so they post a rant, or they wanna make it to 90 days so they use support for a little or some just discovered thus site so they use it to open up the pain and "lost" years of their private lives, these people, come and go, start a thread, usually dont really update it, because they sorta hopefully got what they needed. But many, post here simply because we dont know the specific days or times that hashem will decide we are ready for the next test, and sometimes we are no where near equipped or cognizant of it when it comes, so we are a very weak army battling the y"h who is always ready and 5 steps ahead. So, these people just try to keep in touch with the boyz, they post, chat, phone conference, meet, work on their shalom bias, listen to a shiur, read other peoples lives, check their email, make a phone call etc. all in a successful attempt the gain ammunition for when the "leprakim" come around. The ADDICTS have a totally different battleground, you could always tell from the way they post - what type they are.

As for the y"T question, yes its a gemara and halacha that most litvish are nohaig called bh"B after succos and pesach, not exactly the type of yetzer hara that we deal with here in the gye world, but same field.

Michael94 wrote on 17 Sep 2018 05:16:

what helps me is to make shabbos and Tom tovmore productive and fulfilling , I've come to realize that if I want it to be like that I need to prepare myself .
-I look up nice things to say 
-I try to plan what I will sing 
-I sometimes discuss with my wife what she feels will make it more meaningful ,
 and similar things like that 
(although this comes natural to many including myself I find that it's very easy to get tired,  uninspired, etc. preparing mitigates it ) 
when you feel like your properly utilizing the time and get ulifted you are in a much better place and less vulnerable to fall

Hatzlachah 

I would like to say thanks to all those who replied, I find it guiding on a emotional, practical level.

thank u mr growup for ur well defind description of the LIPROKIM 
thanks g-d I found gye before I became addict L'olom (may hashem protect me) 

Mr cord, when I first arrived at gye I knew you as cord800 now I know u as cord1234 may hashem bless u to grow to become cord12345...(arichus yomim vshonim tovim, V'rabim yoshiv me'ovon)

BH I just had a fall

My current feelings are telling me that who says we are ever supposed to win the war we need just to live and not let our gaurd down, and Hashem will do what he fits right to do...

BH you have rewired your brain and are doing very well. Let's keep on climbing. Look forward....

Good evening Chevra,

It’s amazing that there’s always a place to come back when you need it,

I was directed to check out the mehalech of smarts and I’m in middle of going through their handbook,

(If you have stopped working out due to covid (a yunderman at maariv tells me that last he was at the gym (he has been going for years) was pre covid) this can put you to work:))

I would like to share one vort and an exercise:

In the second chapter, under “stages of change” they write, that when a person is prepared to change, he looks to the (his) future and less at the (his) past (this is a shift in mindset). 

In the third chapter there’s a HOV worksheet, they ask you to list your top 5 values in life, here are mine: 1. To build a Jewish home (get married) 2. Grow in yidishkeit 3. Start a business 4. Health 5. Family and friends

surprising enough P. and M. Is no where to be found on the list, on the contrary it has stopped the development of which one of the 5.

Bez”h with effort and work we can do it!

Great point. Welcome back! 

So how u been? Can’t keep us hangin buddy