Your points are very valid.  What about calling a friend?  Read a book.  Listen to music.  Also, realize that the temptation will pass.  Sometimes, we just need to weather the storm.  Sometimes, just knowing the storm will pass can give us chizzuk.

yes thank you gibbor. realizing it will pass is a chizzuk....

What helps me is getting out of focussing on myself and start focussing on others. This isn't something I can merely work on conceptually and hope for change. I needed to get out and volunteer for various organizations and not ones that  I necessarily think I'd enjoy volunteering or for ones that I receive kavod for volunteering at. The other thing that helps me is when I have thoughts that can lead me to acting out I call some one and discuss what's going on in my head. I also pray for the person I may be lusting after. My prayer acknowledges that they are a human being created by God and entitled to all the respect and decency that I'd want for my daughter and I pray they receive all the brachos I wish for myself in this world. 

I'm not quite sure why you want to stop though. It sounds like your saying you want to stop because you don't like the way it makes you feel after. You feel guilty and depressed for days. If you feel so guilty about it, why would you do it again? I don't mean for you to answer that, but it's just something to think about. I know exactly how you feel and what you're going through. I was there myself many times.  The guilt never held me back either.  Often it's not until we get caught that we feel guilty about something. The problem with God is that we always get caught.

Chaim,
realizing the storm will pass is a great way to push-on, also realize that if plan A works for long enough than your thoughts should pass over. That's not to say not to have plan B, of course that's a great idea. Maybe use one of your ideas/serenity's as plan A and another idea as plan B and so on. Personally, something that helps me is thinking about who i'm letting down if i do the aveirah. Another idea is to have a set limud in something, either at specific time in day when it's more of a struggle or whenever you feel the YH attacking you
Keep posting and stay strong   

thank you serenity and 360... i will take your tips and advice on board and will push on....I will let you know how I get on....