Hi.

I've been accessing this website for a few months now, although this is the first time I'm actually posting. I don't have a lot of time right now, but I will write up my full story at a later stage.

But in brief: I'm currently 31 years of age. I first became acquainted with internet material when I was probably about 16. And have had what I would say is a serious problem since I was about 23/24. I've tried stopping many times but there were never the right safeguards or community support to achieve it. I've only ever spoken to one person about it and that was a therapist.

But now I'm totally 100% committed to kicking this thing and getting rid of it. I have had moderate success over the last few months but keep falling back. Each time I do I tweak/tighten the safeguards and it's better next time. I feel confident that I can achieve this. It's good to see others struggling with the same issues as me, and also to see others succeeding. Only others who suffer the same thing can appreciate how hard it is.

My important question right now is: I have the k9 filter installed on my computer. The password is totally hidden from me and I don't have access to it. But the software is registered to an email address that I have access to. I could put in a dummy email, but I'm just worried in case one day I actually will need to change a setting, and for whatever reason I can't get the password, and then I'll be stuck.

So, I thought maybe there was an email address here that was kept for this purpose? And if ever I need to get the new temporary password (99.9% probability will never need to) then I can chase up the email address owners. Does anyone know?

Thanks so much.

bearman13

Welcome bearman13!!!

Can't answer the question about the filters, but it's great to have you here!!

Don't get me wrong, I have a filter and filters are a must to get sober. BUT I have found that no filter, by itself, was enough for me! if I wasn't able to get through the filter (a rare accurance) then I always had my mind to back me up. Even whe I was in Yeshivah with no internet at all, I was still masturbating thrice a week!!

Have you read the GYE handbook? it's a great read with awesome info.

Stick around!! there is a ton to learn!!

Shulem Aleichem to this Holy Kehile
ברוך אתה בבואך
by me i have a chaver of mine who has the password to my k9 and its also set up to him email, so if i ever need to change anything i ask him to come up, otherwise i cant change anything.
another thing i did, there is a option there to add sites to the black list ever without having the password, so i have it in my bookmarks, so whenever i feel i reached a site that i will do the opposite then gain i right away add it to the block list.

anyway, please stay here with us, very good advise and tips and being given here, large amount of chizik of being mashpia here.

A Yid From Boro Park

TAG can hold the password for you, and you can contact them to change things for you, whenever you want.

Hi israel613120. Thanks so much for the reply. What do you mean by "TAG"? I don't know what that is. THanks.

look tag up on google
it stands for technology awareness guarding or something like that

its also listed here on this site under filters

welcome aboard

if you want to stop...really want to, you will find the answers to all these questions...the best way is to find it yourself, for you don't have to convince us that you wanna stop; you gotta convince yourself.

providing for yourself the full protection is the way to go!

b'hatzlachah

WELCOME bearman13! Filters are just the first step. If we keep testing the filters, we will not get better. Keep reading and keep posting. There is lots to learn and get chizzuk from here.

Thanks for the welcome. It is really heart-warming, almost made me cry. It is so hard to live with this burden. Without being able to talk to anyone about it. Having to look others in the eyes and lie to them, or accept compliments about your character but know deep down that you have this secret behaviour. Only others on this site can appreciate how hard it is to face this addiction.

But I feel I must be positive. I will get there. I have installed the VCF filter, and I have k9 installed. They said I couldn't have both of them running but it seems to me that it is working well. I don't have anyone I can give the k9 password/email to, so I have written the password/email inside a book which sits on a bookshelf at my parents house. I know others might think this is risky, but I think it will be OK for me.

Thanks all so much for the welcome. It really means a lot.

For my 1,000th post I pray that this should help you, but there are many people on this site or at TAG that can hold your password for you. If having the pw is a problem for you (and it seems that it may be), keeping it somewhere you know is a recipe for disaster and also an indicator perhaps that your life is not sickening enough to cause you to commit to stop. Look around at the forums here and that is a key component to commitment...not the aveirah, but is this 'addiction' ruining my life. If the answer to that question my friend is "yes," then do yourself and your life a favor and hand the pw over.

b'hatzlachah on all your decisions and all of ours as well!!!