anyone else have periods of depression for a few days at a time when trying to go clean

Was the depression present before this and you were trying to resolve it in the past by acting out, is the depression the result of acting out or is it something else? I used to have the first two. It is called a depression loop where depression leads to failure which in turn feeds the depression even more. The way out of this for me was to find things I enjoy doing. This results in positive energy and lifts the mood which leads to positive behavior which in turn lifts the mood even more. You may be experiencing something else.

For sure, and i also noticed that it comes around 2 weeks in

Extremely normal and expected. Exercise helps a lot to relieve symptoms. Reaching out to the chevra here by phone (or meeting) also does wonders.

yitzchokm wrote on 04 Jan 2024 22:48:

This makes the most sense to me. Thanks. 

I think (I might be wrong, I'm not a professional) that depression often comes from feeling an emotional void, we try to fill that void with bad habits and it can help while we engage in them, when we stop that void is still there and therefore it's important to focus on filling up the void with positive things you enjoy and that will make you feel accomplished as it was suggested my others here.

It is very normal experience to go through, take it one day at a time! a brighter future awaits you beH.

Keep climbing!
True self

Very normal, it happened to me every time I would start to have a good streak about 2-3 weeks in. I found that focusing on the fact that it WILL NOT last forever, and at most a couple of days helped me to be able to utilize distractions to make it through.
Also posting regularly (daily or more often) I found helpful.
Hatzlachah! You can make it through!

I have had a similar problem. I am a bochur in yeshiva and I joined the Shovavim program from YES (highly recommended btw). I started a few days early when I signed up. It was Wednesday I think. Starting on Shabbos, I began to get mild headaches and anxiety for a couple of seconds at a time. This stopped by the afternoon. On Sunday I was in a depressed mood, which continued into Monday. By then it ended. On Wednesday and Thursday I went running, and it was very therapeutic. So far I have been clean for 10 days! This is the longest I have ever gone! Iy"h it should continue!

Yes, I remember the first 30 days, was very hard, & I was feeling very depressed. Honestly this was a drug that used to meditate all my feelings, while i was acting out. so when I stopped acting out, I had to deal with all the issues. Actually A few months into my recovery, I was feeling so bad, and started therapy to face all the issues I never knew about. 

Just chiming in with my own experience...

I just recently began my process of cleanliness and can 100% relate to you. The couch hugging, feeling stressed over everything and anything, not ready to face the world... 

Speaking to people really helps and knowing that it's totally normal. We used to suppress even the smallest pressures with a drug we no longer have (or don't want) at our disposal. Look for alternatives, reach out and hang in there... The future is bright!

- Little Yiftach'l

iyh50 wrote on 07 Jan 2024 02:32:

Welcome IYH!
That is an incredible accomplishment!! Excited to have you here on the forum! Keep on trucking!

Boy - Welcome to you as well!

Depression is very normal and nothing to worry about. It does pass.

As mentioned reaching out to people, exercising or being otherwise involved in something productive helps depression a lot. It is also worth noting that these are the very last things a person feels like doing when they're depressed - they prefer "leave me alone, I'm staying in bed and I'm not doing anything." But despite the lack of desire to do these things, they really do help and make life a lot better.

Keep posting and keep on trucking!!! Chazak V'ematz!

Th