B"H still going and feeling strong!
Going to try to stick to daily posts.
See you back here on Sunday be"H.

Chasdei Hashem had a very re-JEW-venating Shabbos and am starting the week feeling strong. Be"H it should only continue!

Reminding myself of my kabbala to not go anywhere on my computer that I would not want my wife to see and to keep my streak going ODAAT by staying connected and posting daily at least until Purim be"H.

5 days down - on to day 6 be"H! 
B"H going strong and staying connected. 
I am so grateful for GYE and this chevra of such supportive and growing people. Thanks!

You are doing great!! Keep posting and reaching out to your partner! 

What do you find most helpful in staying on track?

Posting on the forums? Having a schedule? A better filter?

Thanks, b"H another great day! Today will be day 7, a full week b"H!

Right now, for me it's less about fighting for each day and more about being back in the healthy zone that I was in back when I had my long streak of something like 120 days or so. B"H I feel back in that place. I knew I could get there I just needed help getting back up. As HHM says, it's not that I fell off the mountain and had to start all over again from the bottom, I just fell down on the mountain and needed to get back up and continue forward. (It was a really slippery spot on the mountain though!)

I did fix some holes in my filter but that's not what's doing it for me since when I am in that unhealthy zone, I can spend hours looking for new holes. It's more the real support by real people on the forums and my partners and mentors that have gotten me back up. My own resolve to make this happen today by aiming to get to Purim in this healthy state of mind (which feels so good b"H) also is helping me keep it going. B"H, since I started this new plan last week I haven't really been having any struggles (bl"eyh!).

Can't thank Hashem and you guys enough!!

B"H doing great!  

I have some free time now and a lot things I need/want to get done. Feeling a bit overwhelmed, but going to make a list, put on some music, and get to work. Looking forward to the rest of a great day! 

B"H I did indeed have a great productive day yesterday and on to another one today be"H!
Sticking with my plan to keep on posting daily at least until Purim.

Keep you posted....

Chasdei Hashem I had a super week!!
I feel like a free man, back up on the mountain with a fresh, rewired, brain that is not constantly turning to lust to satiate the monster. Thank you all for following my journey, it makes such a difference. See y'all next week! Looking forward to another free and geshmaka week be"H!

Good Shabbos,
Detreminedtowin

DeterminedtoWin wrote on 22 Jan 2021 20:05:

Amazing! You got this! Keep updating. 

How u been?

Thanks YeshivaGuy for checking in! I was barely at my computer yesterday and forgot to post and update you guys.

B"H feeling strong and clear! (I don't like saying still... because it sounds like I'm expecting to fall at some point. Right now, I just am doing good, not still doing doing good.) B"H I had a very special and wonderful Shabbos (family simcha!) and am looking forward to another great week. Getting excited for the heiliga day of Purim that is starting to get a little closer! (My kids already started listening to the Purim story! ) 

Reminding my self of my resolve (sounds better than kaballah) to bl"n not go anywhere on my computer that I would not want my wife to see (or else -$100!) and to keep posting daily and staying connected with my partners and mentor. The knaas doesn't even feel as necessary right now since I am not feeling the struggle b"H, but I threw it in my "reminder-to-self" just in case. We all have days that are harder than others, hopefully I wont have any in the near future, be"H.

Have a super week everyone!
Determinedtowin 

Pat yourself on your back for hitting 12 days! That is something to be proud of doing.

Look at how consistent you have been posting on the forum! You stuck to your resolve to try and use a tool to help you overcome this challenge! Kudos to you!

Keep up the great work and you seem to be in a great place!

Amazing!

We've got your back and will BLN be looking out for your posts on a nightly basis.

Nothing like good ol' accountability (and a dosage of daily TLC from people who truly care about you doesn't either hurt)...

IMG

Thanks guys for your responses and your encouragement. Posting daily has been really helpful and it makes it even better knowing that people are actually seeing what I post.



B"H doing really well. Yesterday, I was watching a kosher video on a kosher site and when it was done it took me to youtube. I don’t know if it was actually opened up for some reason or just a glitch that would have worked itself out if I were to have tried any other video on youtube. Either way, my initial response was to just leave it and tell myself that I am doing so good that I can just leave it alone and it won’t be an issue for me. Then I realized what was happening and that it was a part of the old me feeling a little pas besalo. I immediately went ahead and confirmed that all filters were up and running smoothly and that I could not regain access to youtube at all. B"H, all is up and running properly.



To me, the fact that I realized that and was ready to immediately block it was progress and testament to the fact that I am b”H in the “clean zone” and not looking to pursue any fixes right now. In the past (just a few weeks ago) I would have likely left it alone for a day and then start with kosher videos, and it would slowly turn into more and more “fix” worthy material eventually resulting in a full-on fall. B"H I am in a place now where I would not have allowed that process to happen this time even if I could have.

Chasdei Hashem having another super day!