wow
thanks Reb Dov
i printed out that post
im going to learn over soon that "shmoos" with honest open thoughts and facts

ZemirosShabbos wrote:


thanks a million Zerimors
ill copy paste from there a few words, its a real Shrek quoted from the old member named
Bardichov (Zy"u)

uni

hi

i am probably the biggest oihaiv yisroel on this site

having said that here is a dose of anti-biotic but it comes with a huge needle

happy birthday

zechus shmuss
signs shmigns

you are a inch away from having a full blown affair

with a woman of your imagination

maybe its your shviggers neighbor

mayb its the downstairs neigbors 14 year old baxhurl

maybe not

it might just be a lonely heart like you

who cares??!!

you r in deep doo doo

u are on the cusp of destroying your life

your wifes life

your kids life

all your shvuggers and brothers

your roov yor rebbe your boss

for what??!!

for a women that is good on the chat room

and if she were really so hot dont u think she would have a decent relationship with her hubby

go take on the day



i am here for u

i feel your pain

the emmes hurts

but fake chizzuk will hurt more

ליידער ליידער
by me its no "Shvigers Neighbor"
its my neighbor itself
makes things MUCH MORE complicated to avoid

Hashem Yaazor
He will if i will
הבא לטהר מסייעין לו
i just have to be a real הבא

Shalom Duddy!!

So many wonderful guys on here I don't think I could add much in terms of chizuk.

I like mechanics better. My understanding of addiction is that it stems from us, the addicts, not being able to deal with some kind of spiritual pain, this pain creates a hole in us that we try to fill with whatever our addiction is, women, alcohol, drugs, etc.

Everyone enjoys these things but addicts have discovered using these pleasures to numb the pains and tribulations in life.

So my question to you would be: what is causing you spiritual pain in your life? Spiritual pain includes all negative emotions and attitudes: anger, sadness, resentment, worries.

How's your life? Next time you recognize you're lusting after her, stop and ask yourself, what were you feeling right before? Job worries? Shame over not being productive? Resentment to wife or kids? It could be anything, i know nothing about you.

Think about it and get back to me.

I bli neder will pray for your success

DuddyM wrote:


This has immediately become my mantra

does anyone think that a 90-day-chart might help out this Yid DuddyM
or it will it just be a BandAid??

me think you thinkin' too much.

b'hatzlachah

as of now, as many ppl i talk, that much opinions:
-SA live is a must, nuthing will help u duddy.
-duddy, dont u dare, i heard ur story its not for u.
-a therapist is number 1.
-the therapists r full of it
-duddy im amazed by u..............
-duddy ur lost.............


ill Copy Paste A Vort a got today, might be useful

הַגְּמָרָא אוֹמֶרֶת כָּל הַצּוֹפֶה בַּנָּשִׁים,סּוֹפוֹ בָּא לִידֵי עֲבֵרָה. יֶשׁ "הַבְטָחָה" מֵחֲזַ"ל שֶׁסּוֹפוֹ בָּא לִידֵי עֲבֵרָה...

הצדיק ר' אהרון ראטה זצ"ל כתב: "ככל שגדול הניסיון ובכל זאת מתגבר הגבר הישראלי
ומקדש את עיניו, בזה הרגע זוכה נשמתו לקבל פני שכינה ונעשה שמחה וחדווה בכל העולמות, כפי גודל הניסיון, ושכינת כבודו יתברך שמו מנשקת את עיניו הטהורות, וזוכה לשבר כוחות הרשע ממאות אנשים אחרים בישראל, שזוכים בזכותו להיות שומרי עיניים

DuddyM wrote:

ok so do it

DuddyM wrote:

will it make you worse?

DuddyM wrote:

Therapists have been known to be able to help people

DuddyM wrote:

Will it make you worse?

DuddyM wrote:

By your willingness to admit that you have a problem and are willing to do what it takes to find a solution

DuddyM wrote:

Only if you sit and do nothing (thinking about how much you "messed up" and not doing anything about it is just as bad as doing nothing and possibly worse).


-Eli

DuddyM wrote:
WOW! I never saw GYE summed up so well and so Succinctly!

Now here is the real question. What do YOU think?

what i think???
as i now i take a day at a time...
whats ganna be???
עד יום מותו תחכה לו אם ישיב מיד תקבלו
its not easy

still didnt found any1 here with a story like mine.
and yes i think according to the big book, yes i am an addict
-yes i am powerless FULLY, without a a doubt.
-Hashem can help me, HE WILL help me

He helped me!

well
i must say he helped me too
my whole being, life, is just from him
+my joining this group is just from him
כי אשב בחשך, ה' אור לי

DuddyM wrote:


Dear Duddy,

Reading thru your list, I cannot see what I wrote you in any of those suggestions. Have you addressed any of the things I wrote about? I am curious if that is becasue you just read it, liked it, and relegated it to the heap of great ideas, sforim, mussar, and 'chizzuk' we all have in the back of our dusty drawers (that eventually get all obscured by our valiant struggles with our porn and fantasy stuff and sometimes by yucky sperm, of course)...or if you thought through whether anything I wrote actually applies to you or not, and why/why not?

And I am curious if you have actually tried the suggestions for either case afer deciding which applied to you.

But this is your thread and your thing, not mine. I am just hoping you get the help you need and doing my two cents here.