WWW
i can't tell you much more but i still think your fighting nature. Eventually it will win.
Animals leave the world the same way they came in. They eat, sleep, mate and do it over again their whole lives. All they care about is themselves. They don't give thought to anything other than themselves.
People are in this world to improve ourselves and to improve the world. We're not meant to leave the world the same as how we came in.
People have animal instincts. Among other things,guys are wired to be attracted to and want girls, but we also have intelligence, and have the power to make decisions beyond our own desires. Our job is not to be like the animals, but to be better, to work on ourselves, to care about others and the world around us.
We can work on ourselves and succeed.
WWW
do you think that the reason why so many frum guys have these issues is because they married women they cannot stand?
No such thing, and there are no barriers in regard to religion or lack thereof. For most guys these issues begin way before marriageable age.