Who don't you believe?
I will leave it to others to say how much God loves you.
My question would be about you.
whatever it is that you did/do, and for how long, what is it that you have tried in the past to help you recover?
Are you in fact powerless over this disease?
You might not be; i don't know.
I know I am.
If you are, we can continue.

Jeff, I guess the first question about you and love might be this:

Do you really believe that anyone who really knew you, where you've been, all about you and what you do and how you really feel inside, could ever really love you?

strugglin', but here.
best place to be.

b'hatzlachah

Dov wrote:


That was not 'answering with a question'. If you answer that question honestly and clearly, it will lead you straight to the relevant answer to your own question. I don't play with people here, don't worry.

I would like to nominate this line by our dear chap 9494 as the best line of the week, perhaps even year:

Group 113,062,587

Agree?

Second

I do not hold with those who believe that alcoholism is entirely a problem of mental control. I have had many men who had, for example, worked a period of months on some problem or business deal which was to be settled on a certain date, favorably to them. They took a drink a day or so prior to the date, and then the phenomenon of craving at once became paramount to all other interests so that the important appointment was not met. These men were not drinking to escape; they were drinking to overcome a craving beyond their mental control.

We are people who normally would not mix. But there exists among us a fellowship, a friendliness, and an understanding which is indescribably wonderful. We are like the passengers of a great liner the moment after rescue from shipwreck when camaraderie, joyousness and democracy pervade the vessel from steerage to Captain's table. Unlike the feelings of the ship's passengers, however, our joy in escape from disaster does not subside as we go our individual ways. The feeling of having shared in a common peril is one element in the powerful cement which binds us. But that in itself would never have held us together as we are now joined.

SA book

The sexaholic has taken himself or herself out of the whole context of what is right or wrong. He or she has lost control, no longer has the power of choice, and is not free to stop. Lust has become an addiction. Our situation is like that of the alcoholic who can no longer tolerate alcohol and must stop drinking altogether but is hooked and cannot stop. So it is with the sexaholic, or sex drunk, who can no longer tolerate lust but cannot stop.

Thus, for the sexaholic, any form of sex with one’s self or with partners other than the spouse is progressively addictive and destructive. We also see that lust is the driving force behind our sexual acting out, and true sobriety includes progressive victory over lust. These conclusions were forced upon us in the crucible of our experiences and recovery; we have no other options. But we have found that acceptance of these facts is the key to a happy and joyous freedom we could otherwise never know.

many of us see that regardless of how, why, or when it began, there came a time when we were not only aware of the power this thing held over us, but that we were acting against our will. Only when we tried stopping did we see that we were captive to a force stronger than we, at the mercy of a power greater than ourselves.

step into action

if we permit a lust thought to remain in our heads without dealing with it immediately, we begin physical, mental, spiritual, emotional, and neurological changes within us.

ques # 9

was the anticipation or the pursuit more important than the relationship?

last week's recovery is about as useful as last week's shower (if you took one).

A very smart and astute woman once wrote this about men:

My whole life I've put men into two categories - those I think can unblock the sink, figure out where that loose wire aught to fit, pick up their own socks etc - and therefore exist,

and those that can't even figure out that dirty cups belong in that blocked sink.... and therefore don't exist...

Category one is a veeeeeeeeerrrrrrrrrrrrry lonely place!

Personally, I think there is a reverse mentality regardin' the way men, especially men like me, view women.....the problem I'm havin' is I cannot seem to figure out what category two should be.

From the Big Book....step 9:

"No matter how far down the scale we have gone, we will see how our experience can benefit others. That feeling of uselessness and self-pity will disappear. We will lose interest in selfish things and gain interest in our fellows. Self-seeking will slip away. Our whole attitude and out-look upon life will change. Fear of people and of economic insecurity will leave us. We will intuitively know how to handle situations which used to baffle us. We will suddenly realize that God is doing for us what we could not do for ourselves".

Amein

there are many outlets for sharin', and I have been takin' advantage of them.
I reach out when trouble is brewin', and lately, I have been reachin' out a lot.
Those who know me know that i am open and honest (even when crackin' my filter).

I might be on a better patch today, but I have fallen hard!
And as Cordnoy (and plenty others of who i learned it from would say): so, what da hell are you gonna be doin' different now?

b'hatzlachah and thanks

Cordnoy,
We love you around here. I always look to you for chizuk and help and I always get it. Keep up the good work!

cordnoy wrote:


fung un fun unfung!!!!!!

thank you

DAILY RENEWAL QUESTIONS

1) Are you willing to admit you are powerless over lust and sexual acting out, just
for today?
2) Do you desire sobriety for the next 24 hours: freedom from sexual obsession
and acting out, freedom from fear, resentment, shame, and isolation?
3) Are you willing to do whatever is necessary to protect this desire including
spiritual reading, reaching out and calling others, prayer and meditation, physical
care of your body, setting appropriate boundaries, and refusing all lust hits as
toxic?
4) Just for today, do we commit to God and this group that we do not have to
have sex with ourselves or anyone else (except a spouse) no matter what,
realizing that at the end of this 24 hours we are free to continue with sobriety or
go another way?
5) Do you understand that this renewal does not keep you sober (God does), but
it does make you aware of yourself and accountable to others?
6) And, just for today, are you willing with me to hand over your will and the care
of your life to the One Who kept you sober yesterday and has protected you from
the full consequences of your lust in the past?
7) Have you done anything in the last 24 hours that you’re ashamed of?
8. Are we aware of anything in our plans for the next 24 hours of which we might
become ashamed? Any danger zones, slippery spots on the horizon, or hidden
bottles we should bring to the light?