Sunday, 27 November 2011

What We Are Really Seeking

Someone who was traveling in China sent us an e-mail that he was feeling weak and had began to slip in the area of Shmiras Ainayim. He was worried that it might lead to a fall. Here is our reply:

by GYE (See all authors)

Such times are truly a test, and through them you can reach tremendous growth. Hashem is with you in China, just as He is always. Remember what Dov always says, "no situation can be bad enough that a little lusting won't make it even worse"... The things we are looking for in lust are really a subconscious need for love, warmth, comfort, security, etc... And we need to keep reminding ourselves that we WON'T find it in lust! Our minds make us think that we will, this is the chemical make up of our nature, but it is an illusion. As a matter of fact, the more we pursue the lust, the LESS security, warmth and comfort we will find. Once we open the door to these behaviors, we become slaves to our basest desires and we become filled with insecurity and a deep subconscious fear that we will be out of control. And this leads only to a viscous cycle of needing more lust to calm those fears, and it never ends.

Instead, we need to remember that all that we are looking for in the lust can be found only in Hashem. With Him lies true love, pleasure, security, warmth and all that we seek in lust - but will never find. You may have seen things already that you wish you hadn't, but what you saw doesn't define you. Like Chazal say, Im Paga Becha Menuval Zeh... You aren't the Menuval, He is. But he wants you to think that YOU are dirty, so he can get you to fall.

The only real and meaningful question for you to ask yourself now is, "what is Hashem's will for me TODAY?"

Ask Hashem to give you sobriety and sanity just for today. He will.

 

If you travel a lot, share your thoughts and tips on this thread.