This is what worked for me...
A number of years ago, I spoke to my Rebbi/Rosh Yeshiva (who is world famous) and I told him that I feel like I am being controlled from the outside and have no physical control over my body and ability to control my actions in my area of weakness. He gave me some ideas, which while helpful, did not 100% solve my problem. I even failed even after taking the advice of one of the gedolei hador. I was really despairing of success.
But B"H, I can relate (from personal experience) that we can succeed.
Many people on this forum found success through SA/12 step programs. For me personally, it was a combination of:
1. A realization that lust related activities aren't what I want and will not make me happy.
2. Realization that I can find what I want and get happiness from other areas in my life (but this is only really practical once stopping the lusting type behaviors).
3. A personal 'incentive program' to break out of the bad habits, developed and reinforced over many years.
4. Recognition that I have a problem and therefore need constant vigilance and work to continue improving and not relapse.