Using our addiction as an impetus for growth
Yosef Yakov Posts a question:
"Where I used to view my addiction as an impediment for growth, I realize today how it served as an impetus for growth".
There is no doubt whatsoever that Hashem accepts our Teshuva and that the sins stemming from our addictions are being erased as we grow. The question is, how do we make up for the things done in the past? How do we convert our sins into merits?
I believe that when we use our addiction as an impetus for growth, then we are uplifting our past sins into merits in a very real way.
- Through this struggle, we learn how to give Hashem our hearts.
- We learn the nature of the Yetzer hara and how to avoid him.
- Through the very falls we had, we learned how to make better and better fences.
- And through our own past falls, we learned today how to help others who struggle in these areas as well.
Chazal say the Torah cannot be upheld properly unless one was "nichshal bo techilah - stumbled in it first". If we use the "nichshal bo" as the very "kiyum" of our Torah today, then the "nichshal bo" is uplifted too!
We mentioned above, that through our own past falls we learn how to help others who struggle in these areas as well. Check out this powerful post from "London" to a bochur who is struggling:
When I was your age, I too struggled with this addiction, and I sought help from my Rabbonim / Masgiach and was given completely misguided advice.
I am now married in my early 30's with children, my wife has been through pure hell as a result of my acting out, and if I do not stop I will loose my children too.
Whenever I see or hear of Bochurim struggling with this issue, I want to shake them and scream at them to get into recovery at an early age. When I was 17 my m/o was masturbating and porn mags, but as you know, this illness is progressive and by the time I was in my mid 20's I was doing things that in my wildest dreams I never thought I would do. If you still think that you are not so bad and that you have not done a certain behavior yet, you should know that "yet" stands for "you're eligible too". Please, please, I beg you to take recovery seriously leave no stone unturned in finding a solution that works for you. Spare yourself and your future wife & kids, years of hell and recovery.
May G-d be with you.
As London said above ; "Find the solution that works for you".
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