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Is it worth it?

By A.K.

GYE Admin Friday, 11 November 2016

One thing I feel that really helps me when I'm about to fall is to stop for a second, and think logically about what the pros and cons of this fall would be.

For example:

Pros: 1) I get pleasure. 2) it relieves stress. (And that's all I'm able to come up with, besides for the fact I'm so much more stressed out afterwards regretting what I did).

Cons: 1) it distances me from my wife and family. 2) I feel so stupid and sad afterwards. 3) disrupts my concentration 4) it ruins my learning 5) it makes me doubt myself about my level of frumkeit and makes me feel like I'm a faker.

And trust me, I could always come up with more cons, but I can't think of anymore pros than those, and those are only b'shas the neffilah because one second afterwards I feel terrible for a lot longer than the amount of time of the pleasure.

So is it really worth it?