The Library

It has taken years in recovery to appreciate that my greatest defect in approaching 12 step recovery for lust addiction was my desperation and panic-driven obsession to 'figure' this program out and do it 'right'. The simplicity of the solution has blown me away. The Big Book of Alcoholics Anonymous can be used for lust addiction recovery. I've taken out relevant terms like alcohol and drinking and replaced it with lust and acting out. I've left the rest of the book exactly the same way, then I sat back with my sponsor, relaxed a bit and read it. When it suggested I take an action I took that action. I found that the more I let go of the wheel and let the Big Book drive, the more I've gotten out of the process. When I do Big Book work with a sponsee, I try to the best of my ability to leave myself and my analytical mind behind and approach the book like it's simply one big prayer for us addicts crying out to Hashem to save us from this terrible affliction. I am seeing miracles.

The Torah relates that the two sons of Aaron died when they introduced “an alien fire” to the altar. Rebbe Yishmael says that they died because they were intoxicated with wine when they did the service. How does Rebbe Yishmael dare to contradict the Torah that clearly st...

This portion of the Torah describes the olah offering, which was entirely burned on the mizbe’ach (altar) and none of it was eaten by the kohanim. The Talmud says that the kohanim needed a stringent warning about the olah service because it involved a financial loss. O...

Someone writes to Dov: I'm not totally at peace with lust during the day. Sometimes, I do feel like I'm holding back a beast that's ready to explode out of its prison. When I meet a girl I like, it's very difficult for me to ignore the sexual attraction element, just be n...

Someone wrote to Dov: Sometimes, when I'm going through a stressful period, I can find myself masturbating in bed at night semi-consciously. Sometimes, I can stop myself before it gets too late, other times I don't fully realize what I'm doing and go the whole way. Did ...

I've been struggling for a long time with lust addiction. BH, last year I've been connecting to GYE. I have done over 30 sessions with Duvid Chaim privately (as my time zone does not allow me to hook up to the big book GYE calls). I am still struggling, but one thing that has helped me tremendously is the chizzuk emails, particularly the pieces from Dov.  I feel I really connect with the things Dov writes, and his comments have made recovery much more real for me. Binyomin

I have been involved with GYE and recovery for close to three years now.  I have, BH, continuous sobriety for close to 4 months now.  I am involved in the phone conferences, have a sponsor and I sponsor others.  I talk to recovering guys every day of the week.  Have a filter also. And I go to face to face mtgs. Thank you for all you have set up to facilitate all of this! Yitzchok G.

Your website has done more for me and my marriage than countless hours and dollars of therapy. Thank you, thank you, thank you!                                                                                                   "neshamaincharge" _______________________________   I just wanted to thank you guys in GYE for the wonderful handbook and the work you do.  I have tried to stop the cycle of lust by pure willpower and never took the handbook seriously. I'm sure you can imagine how it went. Ever since I've started to utilize the handbook I feel like I can say NO to my Y"H. Thank you.                                                                                                                   "Sam K." _______________________________   You are doing a GREAT service to the frum community. Unfortunately, now I don't have money to donate but I am with you in spirit. Kol HaKavod!                                                                                                                        "K.T"

I want to share that GYE has been most helpful and beneficial in my recovery process. The problem resides in the battlefield of the mind, and I used to find myself in the middle of the battlefield with no protection whatsoever to this ailment, nor any kind of weapon to confront this horrible habit. But GYE has given me protection, a full five inches armor on me, and also weapons, powerful weapons to obliterate this enemy. The difference is trying to hit a nail with your bare hand or having a good hammer. With the hammer it's easy, with your bare hands you hurt yourself. That's how much GYE makes it easy to hit the nail, time after time. Thank you for all resources and tools, they have made a world of difference for my struggle!

I wanted to drop a thank you note for the wonderful thing you are doing. I am going through a very difficult time in my life right now, and the worst part is that the battle of shmiras einayim came back with such vengeance that I thought it was unstoppable! That is, until I saw a little ad in the Hamodia that said, "try us - you have nothing to lose". I did! The main chizuk I get from you is the chizuk e-mail - but it's every single day. There are times when I'm up and feeling I might make it through alive, and sometimes I realize that the yetzer hora is a very formidable foe. But there's always that reminder that there are others out there who have been (and are) in much worse places and still have the time to send out chizuk to us mortals.  I can't thank you enough for what you have started. (And for the handbook that you guys mailed me).

Dear R' Morgenstern, A single woman who was a sex addict slept with non-Jews when she was in active addiction. Today she is in 12-Step groups and in recovery. She is clean for a long time. She was recently spoken a shidduch with a Kohen and she is looking for a heter b...

Dov Replies: The way I look at it, I am not powerless over trying. I am only powerless over succeeding. If I am smart (which I sometimes am) I will try to see things in a way that I will not need to resent and act out emotionally inside or outside - but that is not the ...

Good news for the women of GYE! The Women's Big-Book Study Group is restarting! Until Pesach it will be sharing/chizuk and selected readings from the big book. After Pesach it will be big book study/working the steps. Mondays, Tuesdays, and Fridays: 12:30-1:00 EST ...

Vayikra “The Kohen shall provide him atonement before G-d, and it shall be forgiven him for any of all the things he might do to incur guilt” (5:26) The Seer of Lublin commented that after a person achieves forgiveness for a particular sin, he is then in a position to dis...

Every so often there is a news item that research shows promise of a drug that can cure alcohol or drug addiction. Thus far, nothing like a cure has materialized. The possibility of a drug that will cure behavioral addictions such as compulsive gambling or sex addiction i...

Thanks, the Rav's words are so yesodiosdig to me, too. So thanks for reminding me how important it is for me to tell the truth to myself and everyone else today! But there is something I want to share with you and the Rav. At the very beginning of Ch. 5 of AA Bill wro...

In response to the article published in Issue #1219, we have received the following: This is a great topic. Thank you so much for covering it. I've been sober in SA for over 5 months now, and I was always scared of going to a meeting. I imagined I would meet all my close...

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