Subjugating the Other Side

by Be Holy, GYE (See all authors)

The Zohar in Parshas Tetzava brings an encounter between R' Shimon Bar Yochai and a old Holy Jew who came out of the desert. R' Shimon asked him why he had been in the desert and he replied that he dwells there the whole year round and learns Torah, explaining that he did this because the desert belongs to the Sitrah Achrah. Therefore, by serving Hashem there, he was subjugating the "other" side. And the old man went on to say how the Torah can only settle in the desert, for the following reason (here are the words of the Zohar translated):

For there is no light besides that which comes out of darkness. And when the "other" side is subjugated, the Master of the World is elevated and his honor is increased. And avodas Hashem can only be through darkness, and there can be no good, only though bad. And when a person goes into a bad path and then leaves it, the Master of the World's honor is elevated. And therefore, the "Shleimus" (completion) of everything, is good and bad together - and then to leave to the (side of) good. And there can be no good but that which comes through bad, and from such good, Hashem is elevated. And this is called an "avodah shleimah" (a complete service of Hashem).


Two holy Jews on our 90 Day Chart, "Be Holy" and "Ano-nymous", have both reached yesterday 3 weeks of sobriety. They post their progress on the "Wall of Honor" section in the forum every day and give each other chizuk!

Guys, this is what it's all about. Sincerity, Teshuvah, Ahavas Yisrael and giving our hearts to Hashem!

I want to share with you below, two beautiful posts from "Be Holy" (edited for clarity), where we can see how powerfully true are the Zohar's words above. What beautiful good and what shining lights come out of the darkest darkness!


Post 1:

Dear Ano, we are all together here - i am at 3 weeks and was feeling down but i thought to myself - smile and pray! We are offering the most important thing in this world to hashem. Until we are "rewired" with a "ruach chadash", I try to make sure not to harp on thoughts of wanting to act out. Instead I decided to dance until I was about to break a sweat. I just kept smiling because that was against my feelings. We must believe that we are bringing hashem so much nachas - especially in our generation that is so steeped in all kinds of immoral things. Don't you think hashem looks at us and says, this is your mission in life and I am so proud of you! Keep up the good work and here is a gift- a little more closeness and true joy...?

Think how amazing Chanuka will be clean! Think more about your brachos- if you wanna act out, grab something to make a bracha on and say it very slow, concentrating as much as you can on every word. This seems to help me, along with spontaneous singing and dancing, or anything active. By the way, do u do any physical activities during the day? This is very important.

Be strong! The light of chanuka is coming to guide us through our darkness. Hold on, there is light at the end of the tunnel.


Post 2:

One huge bonus for everyone who is working in their purity is that you begin to feel things more. Shabbos becomes real, you feel closer to your friends, you yearn to be by other people's simchos. Your blessings to hashem and other people take on the whole inner self.

Sometimes we may think that porn and chat lines and such things have become part of us and how futile it is to try to get rid of them, and we say "they are so ingrained in me!" Personally, my porn habit goes back to my early childhood, almost 20 years!! The illusion part of my brain and porn had become my best friends. I felt that i can never change and thought that it's time to face the fact that I will live with these things my whole life. Well now I scream a battle cry! IT IS NOT TRUE!!

Hashem give us strength, and send us simple compassion! We may fall at the battles but the war will go on and be won!!

People, this is not living!! The addiction takes over our entire being, thoughts, actions. We feel guilty, and never feel like we are being true to ourselves. We want to live and be free once again to FEEL. To feel joy, pain and love. It's time to stop forgiving and forgetting ourselves, to stop feeling bad about what we have done. It's time to become the real me!! We know it will be hard- but that is what life is about. We all are "wired" differently, but that is our test!! We shall not fall at the first hurdle! Keep going and we will be blessed with life!