First Yom Kippur Without Guilt

by GYE Member (See all authors)

First Yom Kippur Without Guilt

By E.M

BH, this Yom Kippur I was able to say Vidui Drabeinu Nisim for the first time ever without any guilt. I am over a year clean!

And surprise of surprises, I happened to have davened vasikin on R"H and Y"K for the first time in my life; first time Vasikin in ANY davening of my life. I happened to read in the Kaf Hachaim (5) that Vasikin is mechaper for Zera L'vatala! What hashgacha pratis! Hashem obviously wanted me to daven vasikin to send me a sign that my Teshuva is accepted!

What helped me most?

1. The 90-day plan got me started seriously.

2. Sharing With my wife and rov.

3. Finding out that I’m not the only one.

4. And mostly, taking each opportunity one at a time, and not saying I can’t look the rest of my life. Just one day at a time.