my 2 cents
i think youre biting off more than you can handle. reason being that the computer is obviously a big draw for you, and you are getting down on yourself for not staying off it. I would think that it would be smarter to allow yourself to be on with certain precautions etc... as have been discussed. but that just my 2 cents which may or may not make sense

Your point is well taken. I will focus on using my time productively - learning, spending time with my family, reading, and sleeping, which will automatically reduce my computer time.

I will allow myself on the computer, but not for long stretches of time

Be matzliach!

Great news to report: I was just in the SAME situation that I have repeatedly failed at in the past, and I passed! Boruch HaShem! Instead of feeling disappointed in myself and stupid and weak, I feel energized, great, and strong. If only this could happen every time...consistently!

HAHA!!!  YESSSIR.    KOT!!!

;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D

WAY TO GO !!!! HOOORAY !!!!!!!!!

Today is day 6...and after last night's near miss, I'm feeling stronger than ever. Kind of like after they find something wrong with the airplane, and it is delayed on the ground for 2 hours, some people are nervous about the future flight, but I always think, wow, this is way better that they found this problem BEFORE we took off, and now that they knew there was a problem/near miss, they must have really checked and fixed everything well, so we are actually even safer than before.

One can learn a lot from a near miss, and I am thankful to HaShem that I didn't need to fall flat on my face in the mud pit to get the message He is sending me...fix this area of vulnerability, so that you don't fall in the future. Since you really wanted to pass, and really needed to pass to get "the ball rolling" (clean days), I helped you succeed at the last minute. But take the warning, and don't let it get that close again. Boruch HaShem, I got the message. And I also realize through this episode, how much HaShem really loves me and wants me to break free and succeed. This feels amazing.

sounds very good!
keep up the good work
zs

Today is day 7...when I successfully make it through today, it will be a FULL WEEK clean. Maybe a small achievement for some, but a very good indication that I am on the right track for me. Since starting here, I have messed up WAY MORE than usual, and haven't been able to put ANY successful string of days together. But that was all in the past, and now I am Boruch HaShem on track...and feeling good.

Phenomenal!

gevaldigggggg!

pssssst, wanna know a secret?, there is a pub on GYE,
www.guardyoureyes.org/forum/index.php?topic=1609.msg102671#new
why dontcha head over and make a lechaim or two or three or....
drinks on me!

I am now completing day 8. Eight is great.

I am up way too late tonight, and may have failed in the past...as this is the danger zone, but I am flying too high and am too focused for it to even be a big test right now. I hope it is always this way  , but I know that it won't be.

Thanks for the l'chayim.

Thanks for being with me in my struggles AND successes!

LEVEL 2!!!!!!

I don't know about Starbucks but you can buy Woodford in any liquor store in America if you are 21 years old. If you are too young, ask Bardichev to buy it for you, he is 84 next week.

As far as I know, Woodfood Reserve is a bourbon, though I have never tasted it.

It is on the kosher list:

www.crcweb.org/KC_latest.pdf

But I am looking for a very good, kosher coffee liquor (as I mentioned in my last post). I can't find Starbacks in the liquor stores, and Kahlua is a problem/not recommended.

Today is day 9!

 p.s. is Woodford Reserve very good, or is it just part of an inside joke or something? Because I do like Jim Beam Black