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Zemmy's story

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Scientific studies show that it takes 90 days to break an addictive pattern in the mind. Start your own Log of your journey to 90 days! Post here to update us on your status and to give each other chizuk to stay strong!

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TOPIC: Zemmy's story 107025 Views

Re: Zemmy's story 03 Nov 2011 17:27 #124132

ur-a-jew Current streak: 1087 days OFFLINE Platinum Boarder Posts: 1717 Karma: 55	bardichev wrote on 03 Nov 2011 17:14: anteater cholint?? Whats the problem, you never put some A&W into your cholent? Attachments: A&W.jpg (22KB) A&W.jpg_thumb (32KB)
	Help free Sholom Rubashkin by giving him the zechus of Shemiras Eiynayim. www.guardyoureyes.org/forum/index.php?topic=2809.0 Last Edit: by .

Re: Zemmy's story 03 Nov 2011 17:32 #124134

ZemirosShabbos OFFLINE Platinum Boarder pass the compote Posts: 6153 Karma: 72	actually maybe it was bardichev wrote on 21 Sep 2011 20:06: auntie erma
	Sometimes life is like tuna with not enough mayonaise ~Inna beshem ZS Give, Forgive ~Cordnoy The reason I'm acting as if I'm pregnant, is because I'm expecting. I should be accepting. ~TZ Last Edit: by .

Re: Zemmy's story 03 Nov 2011 20:43 #124202

gevura shebyesod
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What happened to Auntie Erma? Ant eater cholint?

!אנא עבדא דקודשא בריך הוא

וּבְיָדְךָ כֹּחַ וּגְבוּרָה וּבְיָדְךָ לְגַדֵּל וּלְחַזֵּק לַכֹּל

"If it would be so easy there wouldn't be a GYE, but if it would be impossible there also wouldn't be a GYE."
"Sometimes a hard decision leads to an easier outcome."
- General Grant

My story: guardyoureyes.com/forum/19-Introduce-Yourself/111583-hello-my-friends

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Re: Zemmy's story 04 Nov 2011 07:00 #124256

obormottel OFFLINE Platinum Boarder Posts: 1440 Karma: 6	ZemirosShabbos wrote on 03 Nov 2011 17:01: Mottel, please share \ Sorry, been busy making sandwiches for everybody. Zemmy, your wrap is in the fridge. For an appropriate brocho (in my opinion) see my Vertel here http://www.guardyoureyes.org/forum/index.php?topic=4659.msg124254#msg124254
	Baby steps. If the road is pulling you down, it's a sign that you are going uphill, so just press harder on the gas! Have a great day - unless, of course, you made other plans. Last Edit: by .

Re: Zemmy's story 04 Nov 2011 14:02 #124289

Jackabbey Current streak: 3 days OFFLINE Platinum Boarder Posts: 835 Karma: 0	have you ever heard the song anti evrayu, for chad gadue at the seder night?
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Re: Zemmy's story 04 Nov 2011 14:58 #124296

ZemirosShabbos OFFLINE Platinum Boarder pass the compote Posts: 6153 Karma: 72	Shmeichel, i don't understand what song you are referring to gevura, it took me about 12 hours but i think i just chapped the joke. and yes, maybe an ant did eater cholint
	Sometimes life is like tuna with not enough mayonaise ~Inna beshem ZS Give, Forgive ~Cordnoy The reason I'm acting as if I'm pregnant, is because I'm expecting. I should be accepting. ~TZ Last Edit: by .

Re: Zemmy's story 04 Nov 2011 16:22 #124305

gibbor120 OFFLINE Platinum Boarder NEVER EVER GIVE UP! Posts: 5251 Karma: 166	Hi ZS, I'm slower than you (turtle emoticon). Nice to "see" you today.
	My Home \| My Links \| Dov Quotes \| Dr. Sorotzkin \| Handbook \| Additional Tools \| AA Audio \| Shalom Bayis \| Skep's Tips Last Edit: by .

Re: Zemmy's story 07 Nov 2011 22:16 #124714

ZemirosShabbos OFFLINE Platinum Boarder pass the compote Posts: 6153 Karma: 72	tonite is time to be a MAN: monday appreciation night at least in Zemmsville post-it note, flowers, take out the garbage, ask for doubles at supper , go for a walk, give a sincere compliment, wash the floor, or the dishes, buy a nice sushi roll or any other nice thing you can do for your wife
	Sometimes life is like tuna with not enough mayonaise ~Inna beshem ZS Give, Forgive ~Cordnoy The reason I'm acting as if I'm pregnant, is because I'm expecting. I should be accepting. ~TZ Last Edit: by .

Re: Zemmy's story 07 Nov 2011 22:23 #124715

gibbor120
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NEVER EVER GIVE UP!
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You have a lucky wife!

You remind me of something I heard on a tape once (don't want to say who I heard it from in case I mess it up. I heard it a long time ago). This rosh yeshiva said that when he came home from yeshiva as a bachur, his mother would prepare a nice meal. His mother wanted him to enjoy his meal. The purpose of getting pleasure out of the meal was for the sake of his mother. That's how we need to approach gashmiyus in olam hazeh. Hashem wants us to enjoy. We should enjoy it because it makes "Him" happy kavayachol. Not for our own selfish pleasure.

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Re: Zemmy's story 08 Nov 2011 14:03 #124796

Back on Track	Zemmy, that is an awesome acronym and idea! Please share that with rabbeinu Guard. Maybe on the daily newsletter there can be a MAN section once each week, with a story of some guys MAN-ly success or insight. this could promote so much recovery and shalom bayis! Nice!
	Last Edit: by .

Re: Zemmy's story 08 Nov 2011 15:54 #124813

ZemirosShabbos OFFLINE Platinum Boarder pass the compote Posts: 6153 Karma: 72	it was a great thing for me last night. some stressful stuff on the home front. the post-it note was a davar be'ito boruch hatatty add this to the GYE list keep on trucking (נ"א monstuh trucking) say lishuascha kivisi eat cholint (in Mottel's kitchen) quote Dov and be a MAN
	Sometimes life is like tuna with not enough mayonaise ~Inna beshem ZS Give, Forgive ~Cordnoy The reason I'm acting as if I'm pregnant, is because I'm expecting. I should be accepting. ~TZ Last Edit: by .

Re: Zemmy's story 08 Nov 2011 16:05 #124817

gevura shebyesod
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MANstuh Trucking!

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Re: Zemmy's story 08 Nov 2011 16:18 #124822

ZemirosShabbos OFFLINE Platinum Boarder pass the compote Posts: 6153 Karma: 72	good one!
	Sometimes life is like tuna with not enough mayonaise ~Inna beshem ZS Give, Forgive ~Cordnoy The reason I'm acting as if I'm pregnant, is because I'm expecting. I should be accepting. ~TZ Last Edit: by .

Re: Zemmy's story 09 Nov 2011 14:51 #124943

Back on Track	Niceeeee one!
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Re: Zemmy's story 10 Nov 2011 21:37 #125117

ZemirosShabbos
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if i'm full of lust i should not be surprised, right?
if i thought that i was all fixed up that's a mistake. the big bad boychik known as lust is still in the neighborhood.

and this from Alex struck a chord
alexeliezer wrote on 10 Nov 2011 18:01:

giving up lust is a huge step further than just trying to quit the shmutz.

so i can't afford to lust, in any of it's manifestations. including in a marriage. should not be news to me but it is news to my heart.
happily i have friends i can reach out to. and i can post about it.
and i can try to shake him off in the cholint thread. or in the cholent deptartment in Mottel's kitchen.

was feeling like throwing a pity party this morning. but i got busy. these parties need time and planning. the right color streamers, ballooooooons and anteater-possum casserole. and now i'm not sure if i should feel worse about planning the party or to just carry on with the regular old pity. hmmm

in another unrelated cerebral substation.
topic du jour is how emunah and lust issues are first cousins and go places together.
this is a quote from Dr. Sorotzkin in his superb article quoted here
www.guardyoureyes.org/forum/index.php?topic=615.msg51879#msg51879

A frum person who is acting out sexually (or in any other serious manner) will experience intense guilt and profound shame. He will see himself as worthless and deserving of severe punishment, especially if his parents responded to his childhood misbehaviors with intense criticism and/or rejection. This will drive him to intensify his efforts at controlling his behavior. Unfortunately, these efforts will most often turn out to be ineffective since the effort involves suppression due to terror as opposed to change resulting from growth. 16 The failure to change intensifies the self-loathing and terror of retribution. At some point the person will develop a strong resentment toward Hashem/Yiddishkiet for putting him into this untenable situation and so he becomes alienated from Yiddishkeit. Or as one young man put it: “It’s not that you don’t believe in G-D, it’s just that you don’t want anything to do with Him. Just like I don’t want anything to do with my [abusive] father even though I believe he exists!”

This hit home for me. it's not that i don't believe in the RBSO. it's more an issue of feeling uncomfortable in His presence, because of the feeling of inadequacy and disloyalty engendered by my lack of conforming actions.
There is a paradox inherent in Yiddishkeit, seemingly. The RBSO is not a 'vatran' and the whole point of torah and mitzvos is s'char ve'onesh, that we earn our keep. but at the same time there is an unbreakable bond and an immense love between the RBSO and us lucky ones - Klal Yisrael. so He loves even the most wayward ones. While at the same time He will bring you to accounting for every last mayim acharonim missed.
Rabbi Aryeh Kaplan said that every question in Yiddishkeit that cannot be answered is rooted in the yedia/bechira dichotomy. This one is one of them. in my bumbling opinion.
anyway folks, that's it for now. gotta run to mincha
cheers

Sometimes life is like tuna with not enough mayonaise
~Inna beshem ZS

Give, Forgive
~Cordnoy

The reason I'm acting as if I'm pregnant, is because I'm expecting. I should be accepting.
~TZ

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