ur-a-jew wrote on 05 Jul 2011 20:21:


Some people have to actually hit the rock bottom, and some just have to speak with it. v'dibartem el haselah is apparently preferable. But nu...we poshut lack emunah. So here we are.

Klunk!

From the Medrash Talpios, the lesson of the 24,000 widows from Shevet Shimon, as a result of the מַּגֵּפָה:

סיפר מענין אלמנותיהם שהיו עשרים וארבעה אלף
לשני סיבות אחת ראה כח הזנות כמה תקיף לאדם
שאע״פ שכלם היו בעלי אשה עכ״ז הסכימו כלם בענין הזנות במקום
שהיה ראוי להם למחו׳ כיון שהיה להם נשים ומכירים ויודעים שהאשה
חמת מלא צואה ופיה מלא דם אך כח יצר הזנז׳ הסיתם לכן שומר
נפשו ירחק מהם לעשות גדרים וגדרי גדרים לענין הזנו׳ ואל יכנס
אדם עצמו לידי נסיון סבה שניה להודיעך חרבן שהזנו׳ גורם בביתו
אדם שמתאלמן לנשותיהם ומיתה לבניו ומביאם לחזור על הפתחים

In other words, one geder to watch yourself from lust is not enough.  And lust can cause the destruction of families and the loss of parnasa.  Hashen should save us.

It is well known that a segula for health is to say Asher Yatzar with kavanah.  Presumably this is because when we show gratitude to Hashem for what he has given us, He allows us to enjoy these things to their fullest.  What we may not realize, however, is that hidden in אשר יצר is a tefillah for shemiras eiynayim as well.  One of the praises in אשר יצר is the fact that we are created with many openings (נקבים), the אבודרהם writes that among the openings that we are praising Hashem for are our eyes and the eyelids that accompany them:

וברא בו נקבים
כדי להחיותו עשה לו העינים להביט ולראות בהם עשה לו העפעפים לעצים עינו ולישן
ושלא להביט ברע כמו שנאמר ועוצם עיניו מראות ברע

In other words, when we say Asher Yatzar, included in our praise to Hashem should be the fact that Hashem gaves us a built-in tool to help us Guard our Eyes.  No doubt that if a person keeps this in mind during the many times during the day that he recites this brocha, Hashem will assist him in ensuring that the tachlis his eyelids were meant to serve will be carried out.

Thank You Hashem for giving me the tools to Guard my Eyes.

thank you for sharing that great idea

Life Lessons from a Donkey:

ותאמר האתון אל-בלעם, הלוא אנכי אתנך אשר-רכבת עלי מעודך עד-היום הזה--ההסכן הסכנתי, לעשות לך כה; ויאמר, לא

It happens to all of us.  We want, expect, desire something from our wives, and they just don't do it.  We have two choices, we can get upset, think they don't understand us, don't love us, don't take the time to think about us, or we can take the advice of a donkey and give them the benefit of the doubt:  I take care of you during the day, run the house, take care of the kids, I've been there for you all these years, I haven't put you in danger.  And that's not all  ההסכן הסכנתי -- I give you sex at night (עבודה זרה דף ד,ב) (even at times when it's not natural since I didn't desire it)  -- do you think I am doing this without reason?  There very well maybe a very good explanation for this, which you are just blind about.

(and if you're wondering why, if there is such a good reason, I just don't say it ------ it would take a miracle for that to happen  )

Great (but a bit sad) point made!!!!

I hope your wife knows how well you "get it".  Beautiful vort.

Asher Yatzar will never be the same.  Thank you for that.

I went to see a client today and I had to wait for him to arrive.  I didn't have my cellphone, access to a regular phone or a sefer or anything.  Basically, it was myself with a pad and a pen.  I thought to myself what can I do.  So I figured I would make a list that went something like this.

Hashem created me.  A complete act of chesed since He was under no obligation to create me.

Hashem gave me a functioning body.  It has
Working eyes -- there are people that are blind
Working ears -- there are people that are deaf
Working nose -- there are people that can't smell
10 fingers -- there are people that have less or none
10 toes -- there are people that have less or none
Working mind -- there are people that are mentally not well
Working lungs and respitory system -- there are people that need a machine to help them breath
Working stomach and digestive system -- there are people that need a machine to help them process their food
Working legs and the ability to walk -- there are people that are lame
Working mouth and the ability to talk -- there are people that are mute
Working mouth and the ability to eat -- there are people that need a feeding tube

Hashem gave me shelter -- throughout my life I have had a home

Hashem made me a Yid -- I didn't have to be created a Yid, it gives me the opportunity to get close to him and a sense of purpose
Hashem gave me a Family -- there are people that are orphans, there are people that have no children
Hashem gave me friends -- there are people that are social outcasts
Hashem gave me a job -- there are people that are unemployed.

These all relate to my own personal space and it doesn't even get into the gift of the greater world around me.  It also doesn't get into the chochma of each of these individual things.  But the magnitude of the kindness is unfathomable.

And then my client came in.

It pays to have some solitude every once in a while.

Thank You Hashem for all the Brocha in my life and for the ability to contemplate it and to thank you for it.

Good Shabbos to all.

beautiful!

(if you ever start a newspaper or a magazine, please subscribe me)

A thought for Tisha B'Av.  The Gemara in Kesubos (סו,ב) recounts the following incident:

ת"ר מעשה ברבן יוחנן בן זכאי שהיה רוכב על החמור והיה יוצא מירושלים והיו תלמידיו מהלכין אחריו ראה ריבה אחת שהיתה מלקטת שעורים מבין גללי בהמתן של ערביים כיון שראתה אותו נתעטפה בשערה ועמדה לפניו אמרה לו רבי פרנסני אמר לה בתי מי את אמרה לו בת נקדימון בן גוריון אני אמר לה בתי ממון של בית אביך היכן הלך אמרה לו רבי לא כדין מתלין מתלא בירושלים מלח ממון חסר ואמרי לה חסד ושל בית חמיך היכן הוא אמרה לו בא זה ואיבד את זה אמרה לו רבי זכור אתה כשחתמת על כתובתי אמר להן לתלמידיו זכור אני כשחתמתי על כתובתה של זו והייתי קורא בה אלף אלפים דינרי זהב מבית אביה חוץ משל חמיה בכה רבן יוחנן בן זכאי ואמר אשריכם ישראל בזמן שעושין רצונו של מקום אין כל אומה ולשון שולטת בהם ובזמן שאין עושין רצונו של מקום מוסרן ביד אומה שפלה ולא ביד אומה שפלה אלא ביד בהמתן של אומה שפלה

Part of our difficulty in appreciating the severity of the churban and the significance of Tisha B'av is that we sit in America with access to every conceivable amenity.  Thus, unlike in generations past we don't feel like we are have any connections to being handed over to an  אומה שפלה , and certainly not to ביד בהמתן של אומה שפלה.  The reality however is much different because at least in generations past all realized the situation they were in.  Now however we may not be subjected to the physical rule of an אומה שפלה  but we are certainly under their spiritual rule, and not simply the rule of the אומה שפלה  but subjected to the rule of the dregs of their society.  For many of klal yisroel there is nothing wrong about going onto the internet or walking down the street among throngs of half-naked people (being generous with the half-naked).  We just shrug our shoulders and go about business as usual.  Any objective observor would have to say something is not right with this picture.  But fortunately, all is not lost, since in a tiny corner of the world there is a island of respite known as GYE where people recognize precisely that:  something just ain't right.  Slowly, one day at a time, these people are trying to make a difference.  May the zechus of the shemiras eiynayim and desire to grow in all areas from this wonderful site be a zechus that finally brings about the coming of Moshiach and rebuilding of the bais Hamikdash.
Thank you Hashem for giving me the opportunity to be a part of this wonderful chevra.

הערה from my good from Zemiros Shabbos.  According to this pshat it is מדויק why it was the gemara says מלקטת שעורים מבין גללי בהמתן של ערביים.  The gemara in Kiddushin (מט,ב)says: י' קבים זנות ירדו לעולם תשעה נטלה ערביא

Great vort!
and thanks for the honorable mention

hope everything is good is UAJland
have a great shabbos!

Earlier in the summer I had a little sex argument with my wife (I.e., I felt "entitled" she knew I wasn't) which put me in a bad mood.  We were on our way somewhere and being in a bad mood I was driving faster than I should have. Hashem sent me a message pretty clearly when I got pulled over by a cop. I knew right away that it was a message from Above telling me don't for a second think you're right.  So today was judgment day and I guess having hopefully rectified the situation I got off pretty painlessly. Thank You Hashem for the original message and for the favorable outcome.

ur-a-jew wrote on 08 Aug 2011 18:12:


Yeah, it's funny these terrorists are super makpid about "tzniyus" and they are all found to have porn.  I guess there is a lesson in that for us as well .

Thanks so much for sharing that here, UAJ. I feel it is so important to help us all remember that this business is not about perfection or looking good, but all about real living. And real life is not always so pretty.

Along those lines, I want to share here that I davened shacharis at home today and hate when that happens, but was simply up too late a few nights in a row. It makes me feel yuchy when I am late to shul , and even yuchier when I daven at home. Nu. KOT, right?

Seems like UAJ got a little carried away with all the talk of keeping on trucking. maybe we should post speed limit signs and write that they apply to Monstuh' Truckers too

Dov, you teach us all what living honestly and humbly means and we are very fortunate to have you וכמותך ירבו בישראל





ps. a little birdie told me that if you ask Guard or one of the moderators they will allow you to open a thread dedicated to "Dov's Trucking Tricycling Recycling Baby-Stepping Progress". hopefully UAJ will continue hosting you for weekends and for Chanukah break on his thread