I had a really hard night last. I texted 'Hashem Help Me' at 12:30 AM around, but he was already sleeping. I was in the middle of masturbating at 5:30 in the morning when miraculously he texted me back, "Survived the night, buddy?" I was literally a couple of minutes away from falling. I answered him because A) I owe him for caring and I'm committed. I don't know if I'm going to make it to 90 days or even 30 days or even to the end of this week. But, I'm committed now. I always text him or call and I will continue to do so. I just wanted to get on here and thank him for saving me last night and all the other times that he saved me and for all the times in the future when he will save me.
By the way, I'm on my ninth clean day.

Well done! HHM gets a ton of credit but not nearly enough btw

Keep it up!
It's great that you have the strength to text someone during a hard time! 
Like you wrote you don't know how long you'll make it, but the main thing is, one day at a time. Very good attitude.

Wishing you much hatzlacha!
HappyYid

You’re a real fighter there’s no question about that. The way you’re speaking shows you don’t want this in your life. 
what has worked for me is really writing down the reasons and scenarios that cause me to fall and try to eliminate them. Wars require detailed strategy. 

I want to point out that you made it 5 hours! They must have been hell! But you did it! Hashem is smiling at you right now.