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Had a really hard night last night
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Scientific studies show that it takes 90 days to break an addictive pattern in the mind. Start your own Log of your journey to 90 days! Post here to update us on your status and to give each other chizuk to stay strong!
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TOPIC: Had a really hard night last night 159 Views

Had a really hard night last night 21 Apr 2021 23:28 #367251

  • Shower640am
  • Current streak: 8 days
  • Junior Boarder
  • Posts: 30
  • Karma: 2
I had a really hard night last. I texted 'Hashem Help Me' at 12:30 AM around, but he was already sleeping. I was in the middle of masturbating at 5:30 in the morning when miraculously he texted me back, "Survived the night, buddy?" I was literally a couple of minutes away from falling. I answered him because A) I owe him for caring and I'm committed. I don't know if I'm going to make it to 90 days or even 30 days or even to the end of this week. But, I'm committed now. I always text him or call and I will continue to do so. I just wanted to get on here and thank him for saving me last night and all the other times that he saved me and for all the times in the future when he will save me.
By the way, I'm on my ninth clean day.

Re: Had a really hard night last night 21 Apr 2021 23:35 #367253

  • EvedHashem1836
  • Current streak: 140 days
  • Gold Boarder
  • Posts: 239
  • Karma: 14
Well done! HHM gets a ton of credit but not nearly enough btw
Think about how good you'll feel if you say no to desire and compare that to how bad you'll feel if you say yes.

Desire is unique in the way that it is never fulfilled -  if you give in the desire comes back even more powerful in just a few days. Telling yourself that its ok because this is really the last time doesn't work because you are just adding new images to your head that will cause future falls.

The Joy of triumph over the yetzer hara is worth the effort it takes to win. It IS worth it! Keep fighting!

My thread: 
Aiming to be better

Re: Had a really hard night last night 22 Apr 2021 03:40 #367263

  • HappyYid
  • Current streak: 140 days
  • Gold Boarder
  • Posts: 277
  • Karma: 13
Keep it up!
It's great that you have the strength to text someone during a hard time! 
Like you wrote you don't know how long you'll make it, but the main thing is, one day at a time. Very good attitude.

Wishing you much hatzlacha!
Feel free to contact me
My thread

Re: Had a really hard night last night 23 Apr 2021 11:12 #367329

  • Aaron613
  • Junior Boarder
  • Posts: 32
  • Karma: 2
You’re a real fighter there’s no question about that. The way you’re speaking shows you don’t want this in your life. 
what has worked for me is really writing down the reasons and scenarios that cause me to fall and try to eliminate them. Wars require detailed strategy. 

Re: Had a really hard night last night 29 Apr 2021 12:47 #367651

  • Choosechayim
  • Current streak: 3 days
  • Fresh Boarder
  • Posts: 12
  • Karma: 0
I want to point out that you made it 5 hours! They must have been hell! But you did it! Hashem is smiling at you right now. 
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