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Overcoming challenges
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Scientific studies show that it takes 90 days to break an addictive pattern in the mind. Start your own Log of your journey to 90 days! Post here to update us on your status and to give each other chizuk to stay strong!

TOPIC: Overcoming challenges 6859 Views

Re: Overcoming challenges 22 Dec 2020 20:00 #359427

  • Ish MiGrodno
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Happy Birthday zedj.
Keep on making Klal Yisrael proud!

ה׳ עמך גבור החיל! [שופטים ו׳ יב׳]

 Perhaps you can find chizuk from my thread at guardyoureyes.com/forum/19-Introduce-Yourself/356161-Intro 

Feel free to reach out to me at
jackz90dys@gmail.com

Re: Overcoming challenges 22 Dec 2020 20:30 #359429

  • Zedj
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A person is supposed make a cheshbon hanefesh and contemplate where he is at, where he wants go ect ect.

The best times is at an end of something
For example- at the end of the day, week, month or year.

I think if I would be a stock in the stock market, I would be slowly edging my way up.

I have much work to do but it's just the beginning

Wishing all of you and your families much health, parnossah, happiness, success and fulfillment.
And of course the willpower and strength to overcome this nasty nisoyon of lust that comes in all different ways.


Wishing you all only good.
Thank you for the birthday wishes!

One who has given up hope is without a G‑d.

One who sees hope in each day is already free

Last Edit: 22 Dec 2020 20:30 by Zedj.

Re: Overcoming challenges 22 Dec 2020 20:31 #359430

  • Zedj
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I almost forgot!

L'chaim!

One who has given up hope is without a G‑d.

One who sees hope in each day is already free

Last Edit: 22 Dec 2020 20:32 by Zedj.

Re: Overcoming challenges 23 Dec 2020 04:15 #359455

  • Zedj
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29 days clean


Today was a busy, jam packed day.
For the next few weeks I'll be learning for a smicha test.
Looking forward to not being idle and thinking about nonesense.

One who has given up hope is without a G‑d.

One who sees hope in each day is already free

Re: Overcoming challenges 24 Dec 2020 05:38 #359614

  • Zedj
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30 days clean

I would like to give myself a big pat on the back for 30 days of being clean!

73 days cumulative days from when I started!


Busy day again BH.


Wishing you all the best and much success!

One who has given up hope is without a G‑d.

One who sees hope in each day is already free

Re: Overcoming challenges 24 Dec 2020 07:04 #359621

  • Lou
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Mazel tov!
Looking forward to the day I can experience the wonderful feeling you must have right now.
Thank you for all your inspiration.
Lou

Re: Overcoming challenges 24 Dec 2020 14:16 #359630

  • Grant400
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Amazing! Thanks for sharing. Many more! 

Re: Overcoming challenges 25 Dec 2020 01:25 #359690

  • Zedj
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31 days clean

Hashem created tzaddikim, who serve him through their thought, speech and action. Their only desire in this world is to be united with Hashem and fullfil his desires and make this world a dwelling for Hashem ..it's like a sweet dish or a sweet pleasure that Hashem enjoys. 

Hashem created a Beineni, a person that is standing in the front line of a constant daily battle, every step he takes to connect to Hashem the yetzer hora swipes at him trying to hold him back from fullfiling Hashems rotzon whether through lust, urges, desires, thoughts, depression, sadness sometimes unfortunately pain. When the person withstands and is victorious in fullfiling Hashems rotzon he is called a Beineni...it's like a spicy dish or a type of zynger that is pleasent to Hashem

Hashem likes a range of delicacies!

We are battling every day...and I hope one day that we will be free from lust with Hashems help.

Wishing you all well!

One who has given up hope is without a G‑d.

One who sees hope in each day is already free

Last Edit: 25 Dec 2020 01:33 by Zedj.

Re: Overcoming challenges 25 Dec 2020 05:00 #359702

  • Zedj
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Question for the rabim.
Forgive me for trying to understand a very important/element on fighting this battle.

How would you all define a trigger?
I know everyones trigger is different but

Is it anything that I see that starts a fantasy ?
(But stops there)

Or first you think of a fantasy then you have an urge to act out? (The thought of acting out)

Does it matter?

I have been thinking about this.

There are some very real nafka minas I can take out from your opinions

One who has given up hope is without a G‑d.

One who sees hope in each day is already free

Re: Overcoming challenges 25 Dec 2020 05:47 #359706

  • Captain
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I would say that it's anything that causes you to have increased tayvah. Whether it's something lustful or even something random but you know for you that it reminds you of something, etc.
In the place where ba’alei teshuva stand, even pure tzaddikim who never sinned cannot stand. (Rabbi Avohu, Brachos 34b)

Great free resources:
My favorite book for breaking free: The Battle of the Generation 
https://guardyoureyes.com/ebooks/item/the-battle-of-the-generation. Change your attitude and change your life!

Rabbi Shafier's incredible lectures on breaking free: The Fight. Download here: 
https://theshmuz.com/series/the-fight/

Re: Overcoming challenges 25 Dec 2020 05:58 #359709

  • YeshivaGuy
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I define a trigger as anything which makes my heart start beating super fast with Taiva.
For me it’s even hearing certain names (which I associate with people) or even certain scents...

Re: Overcoming challenges 25 Dec 2020 05:59 #359710

  • Lou
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I  would also say it means anything that increases taiva weather or not it leads to anything. I am curious to know what the nafka mina is...

Re: Overcoming challenges 25 Dec 2020 06:16 #359716

  • Realestatemogul
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A trigger would be a post that gets you to think of triggers.....

I am nervous by your question, just because I assume you are using trigger as bad thing. However, sometimes there are triggers we can't avoid and something that maybe aren't triggers that we can and should avoid. 

I guess my definition is - A trigger is anything you have the ability to avoid that can prevent you from doing averios. 

Re: Overcoming challenges 25 Dec 2020 07:08 #359730

  • Zedj
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Oy!
I hope I didn't cause a any triggers!

The main reason I asked the question is because I am renewing my shtar. One of the stipulations is, if I get a trigger I have to text him.

So that's why I'm trying to define a trigger.

For example, I'm walking down the street and I see a attractive woman/girl (although ironically I try to be careful on the street) so I think a,b and c but not about acting out.....then move on with life... trigger?

Or same scenario but aquiring an urge...

Maybe I'm just overthinking this.

I'm glad this is all anonymous because this is just making me feel stupid



Thank you guys for your answers
I guess I have to make clear what a trigger is to me

One who has given up hope is without a G‑d.

One who sees hope in each day is already free

Last Edit: 25 Dec 2020 07:11 by Zedj.

Re: Overcoming challenges 25 Dec 2020 07:21 #359732

  • i-man
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I always understood it to include negative emotions which lead one to act out , ie depression, sadness,anger, resentment, disappointment etc, as well as physical circumstances based on sleep , eating excercise etc . In fact for many - very  positive things can also be a trigger because of the inability to process emotion correctly , as well as the letdown .

I may be totally misinterpreting the word please correct me  if so.
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