Day 2: I had a tough day at work today. I had a lot of work to do and got very overwhelmed and stressed. Also finding it hard to work from home, especially being that I'm stuck at home outside work hours as well because there is nowhere to go, which makes a lot of home time. I'm also quite lazy to leave the house, and I'm the type of person who if he doesn't have a reason to go anywhere he will stay home, but I go crazy eventually from that, and I need things that force me to leave the house, like work.

Ok, that's all for me. 

Have a great and peaceful night!

Day 3: Ok day BH. A lot better than yesterday. Made sure to take breaks during during work so I wouldn't get too stressed. 

I get stronger urges at the end of the day for sure. Some of it is being tired. I think some of it comes from feeling like, crap, I'm going to need to do the same crap tommorow, basically not being super excited about the next day. It actually makes lessens those feelings once I realized that. 

Im going to try and work outside the house tomorrow, I think I need the change of scenery. But hey, that's what I'm saying now. Tomorrow I'll probably find some excuse to be lazy. Or not, o guess we'll see lol

Ok, sorry for the boring ramble. Peace out and have a good night! 

Don't go out into the garden! Save it for a chol ha'moed trip.

Yes sometimes I feel the monotony of everyday life. My weekly attitude is like this:

from the 2 dots there (Pesachim 50b), go down and you can see the Shaphel v'Niphsad who doesn't work all week and works erev Shabbos. I applied that to myself, in yeshiva I'd be lethargic dreading every day, looking forward only to the meals really, then on thursday night (usually after a goon session with p and m) I had this overwhelming drive to be the best bochur, to learn all day and night, and this excitement would last me til around shabbos afternoon when I realise, OH MAN, IT'S GONNA BE ANOTHER LOOOONG LOUSY WEEK!!

Thank God things have improved immensely since then. I thank the program and all you guys here and God yes immensely.

@singularity Not the garden silly, a family member's office that isn't in use at the moment due to covid I ended up going today, so I guess I'm going to need to come up with something good for Chol hamoed 

Day 4: Ok, pretty stressful day. Might be due to medication, or not. Anyways, thank G-d, a lot of good as well, a lot to be thankful for. 

It's weird, when I was younger days were so long. As I got older days flew by and didn't feel significant on their own. Counting days seems to give prominence to each and every day. Where oddly, I feel good about each couple of days clean, because I feel pretty intensely that they mean something and matter. For if they didn't, then why am I disappointed when I'm not clean. Again, not sure where this shift came from, cause I was once at a stage where I didn't feel like anything mattered till I was at least past 90 lol. 

Ok, I'm sure this was nonsense to most, misguided to some, and heresy to the rest, so I'll have pity and stop here. Honestly, so tired not even sure what I just wrote. Hope it's not too ridiculous. 

Have a great and peaceful night!

Day 5 & 6: Yup, skipped a day. Before I knew it shabbos was coming and had no time to post my daily update  

Anyways, thank God, Friday and Shabbos were OK. I printed out the GYE shabbos page they send out on the WhatsApp broadcast and read shabbos day, so that was nice.

Had a nice exercise sesh after shabbos which is always great for the mind and body. Ok, that's all for me for now.

Have a good night people!

Day 7: Good day today BH.  I really utilized the weekend to be productive but also to do things that refresh and recharge my batteries before the week (ye, I don't really like to work lol ). So it was definitely a good reminder at how valuable and helpful Sundays can be. 

I suppose the next step is to figure out how not to hate the week work  

Ok, going to try and get some sleep so I can wake up early and get stuff done before work. 

Have a great night people!

P.S. I'm really seeing Hashem's kindness in my life right now in a massive way.  I hit a little snag, so of course that worries me so. Bitachon ain't easy i guess Sorry if that was super vague and unclear. 

Day 8: Ok, day BH. Work can be stressful. Still haven't found a solution for that. I guess that's part of adam laamal yevolaid. Anyways, thank G-d there is a tremendous amount of good going on, which I'm unworthy of if not for Hashem's massive compassion and unlimited kindness. 

Ok, I don't even know what I'm saying I'm so tired. Ok, have a good night people!

Edit: Also, shout out to GYE for the daily GYE whatsapp boosts. They are awesome. If you haven't signed up, I got no idea what u r waiting for. They are beast.

Keep up the great work!! Yeah, COVID is getting to me also...you're not alone. Glad you found a good outlet from work.

Day 9: Ok, day BH. Nothing incredible or anything, sort of hard, but I'll take it, it was OK. Brachos from Hashem can trigger an emotional response. The proper response is thanking him from the heart. 

Ok, enough rambling lol. Have a great night people!

Day 10: Some difficult emotions today. Also, missing my pre-coronavirus life, apartment and belongings. I'm at the folks now, and would like to get back to my own place soon with more than the couple shirts that I brought home. When it will actually make sense to do that, only time will tell I guess.

Thinking and worrying about silly things as well. Small things. Tryin to let go of that. 

Work is stressful. Seems like all my money just goes to rent. Anyways, thank God, another day. Gonna try again tommorow I guess. Till shabbos anyways. What choice does a man have really? 

Have an awesome night!

I can relate. I miss my Yeshiva dorm, as un-luxurious as it was. Just the regularity of day-to-day. Bez”H soon!
I really appreciate your posts, you’re keeping me going!

Day 11: Stressful day. Sort of at my breaking point on this whole covid thing. 

On a somewhat separate note: Anyone have a link for somewhere I can view the fatality rate of coronavirus in the united states by age? Would much appreciate it!

Have an awesome night people! 

I can send you all different types of statistics, however I think it borders on kefira and on insanity. 
Let's admit that Hashem runs the world.

@lionking Thank you for your thoughts. I respectfully disagree however. Calculating risk is something we do every single day. It is not kefirah or insanity to use data to inform responsible decision making. The only reason you drive a car is because you know that the risk of death is low (regardless of whether you know the exact statistic or not). When there is great confusion regarding levels of risk (such as with coronavirus) it is hard for people to make good choices, collectively or personally. 

12: Feeling quite depressed. I think I'm at my breaking point with the whole lockdown thing. I didn't work today. Just really couldn't. Didn't daven properly. Didn't do a whole lot of anything.

Sorry for the bad vibes. Hopefully shabbos will be nice although I'm sorta dreading it to be honest. 

Have a great shabbos!

Hold on there!!! The best is yet to come!