Dov wrote on 20 Feb 2017 17:02:

Glad to be a fellow knucklehead!

Hi everybody sorry for the long delay it's just that the app on my phone keeps crashing every time I try and post or update my thread.

So here it goes after 200 and plus days I had a fa fall or to be exact I acted out in ways that (falling ma makes it sound like it wasn't my fault)

So he here are some observations.

Number 1 check out the thread by real estate mogul there is a discussion regardi regarding cumulative days and streaks. I will just put in my own two cents that I c after being clean for a while it's definitely a different experience and I feel that I have gain a lot and I hope that it will help me in the future

2. There is a saying money can't buy Happiness but it sure can help The same thing can be said about filters they won't make you clean but they sure can help. My most recent stint in the trash can was due to le leaving a unfiltered device around the house. I did not get around to filtering it be I felt I was in a good place and that I w was not in a rush to filter it. I'm not saying i if it wasn't around I would not have acted out. But it has happened before tha That's when the quote candy is not available so easily saner you're thinking takes over before you get to act out.

I was listening to Eli Nash last night. (For those who don't know he's a successful business man who has come out and talks openly, and wants to make people aware there is hope to kicking porn/sex addiction)

He said a great line. He still goes to meetings three times a week even though he's sober 2 and a half years because.

Im not a slow learner, I'm just quick to forget"

I need to stamp those words on my forehead

Hakolhevel wrote on 08 Nov 2019 14:27:

You remind me of what my sponsor used to tell me, almost every day: the addiction causes us to forget many things.

I like L'Chaim. I don't like the taste (hard liquor that is), but I enjoy the effect. I can enjoy a Shabbos meal with wine or L'Chaim and enjoy the buzz it gives me. I may even occasionally drink more (say Purim). I may even every few years drink too much to the point that I'm on my hands and knees throwing up.

However, I don't think in between drinking how much I enjoyed it. I don't seek opportunities and count the days till I can get my next drink. When I am in the store and I see alcohol, I'm not attracted to browse unless I need some. Even if I do browse, I'm not thinking of how it will make me feel, possibly about how it tastes (and the price;)

Most importantly, after drinking one shot at a L'CHAIM or the like, I dont obssess all day about it, and plan how to get my next. Nor do I seek out the rum balls because they have a little alcohol

A day after drinking to much, I don't make shevuahs never to drink again, although I definitely don't plan on drinking that much anytime soon. I just move on in life.

When my wife's away I don't raid the alcohol cupboard, or browse the internet for the newest drink out there.

Point is, I enjoy it, but I rarley think about it.

Contrast to my lust for Porn/Sex. If I take one "drink" even if it's not full on porn, I become crazy. I start thinking how nice it was, wonder if I can get more. I can be watching something entirely clean, if there is even a hint of immodest women, I automatically focus in that even if it's not the main part of the scene. I plan ways to watch clean things that might have something to feed my lust.

In between "drinks" I can lust all day, thinking, scheming, plotting. All while possibly being technically clean ( this can especially be the case being married)

In short it seems to me I am no alcoholic, but what the alcoholic experiences regarding alcohol, I experience (to some extent) regarding lust.

L'Chaim:)

This post is so true and explains so well what we feel about lust. But this line is pure gold "all while possibly being technically clean." An important reminder that the objective is not to to stay clean but to live a normal life free of lust. 

Wow, I can't believe it's almost a year since my last post on my own thread!

In other news, am I dreaming or has the forum exploded with activity recently?

Interesting, I’ve felt like there’s not nearly enough activity as there should be. There should be 10,000 people a day posting...
But I guess it’s all relative

Hi H.H,

Welcome back!

How are you doing now?

Please don't leave for a year again.
More chizuk is always needed and welcome!

B”H the forum is rocking now lots  of good positive energy 

What's with all the old guys suddenly appearing? Is there some kind of reunion? 

Zedj wrote on 28 Dec 2020 06:30:

Thanks for asking, I didn't leave, I just left posts on other people's thread and not my own. It's easier to deal with other people's problems then mine
as far as there being a reunion of old guys, i didn't know I'm considered old:grimacing:

wilnevergiveup wrote on 28 Dec 2020 14:39:

I feel like “old guys” is a misnomer, this site is only around 12 years old 
But it’s wonderful having the “old guys “ around , 
both the experience and the entertainment aspects.

wilnevergiveup wrote on 28 Dec 2020 14:39:

"Old" is a an adjective used on GYE with the utmost respect. As in aged fine wine. We don't mind a few wrinkles or a stray grey hair or two...after all looks doesn't matter. Hakol Hevel!

Grant400 wrote on 28 Dec 2020 15:57:

Gee thanks!
Howbout a face full of wrinkles?
Howbout hundreds of grey hairs, or better yet, no hair at all?
Then what?