50 days clean!!
the time that AM ISRAEL wait to get the tora, does it mean that i got the tora now??
there is no another way accept of being clean.
its a heal process of everything not just the addiction,
suddenly, i find myself send SMS messages to my wife "I LOVE YOU..." one time a day,
the SLOM BAIT is great. im happy all the time.
something that ive learnt at this period so far is never give up to the MENUVAL (Y"H) but never!!
even a little second look on a pretty woman on the street, even after 50 days.
YODEA ZADDIK NEFESH BEHEMTO means i know what can trigger me or even a little trigger that can HAS VESHALOM lead me to another trigger and than to the big crash.
the Y"H tells you come on man it just a litle look, it won't trigger you to nothing, you 50 days clean you are strong.
i answer the MENUVAL i don't believe you , i know your tricks, just leave me alone.
just in such way, every little victory leads you feel the heal, you will feel that you need it less and less and less.
i wish you my holy guys to learn from that.
may G-d be with me on the rest of my journey. (more 40 days...)