Any reason is a good reason ;-) 

kul hascholos kushos!! and never give up.... dust yourself off and try again!!!!

What gedarim do you have on your internet access? are there filters? CE? 
for me without CE it is impossible I have it on my phone and all my home computers ... unfortunately at work i dont have it so that is where i struggle the most...
I do all i can to avoid yichud with my computer 

Just remember you are heroes for trying. We may not win every battle but if we stay focused, we will win the war b'ezras Hashem. As mentioned, the early days are the toughest. It may be hard to believe, but the pressure really eases up as time goes on. Speaking to people helps alot. You get to hear and actually believe that people get out of this mess. Hatzlocha! 

I appreciate the honesty. For clarification, if you theoretically could act out in a way that nobody would ever find out, would you keep on doing it?

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Lol constant,just wrote you a whole megala but it did not come on must have done Something wrong,will rewrite some other time 

2 Weeks! Bh!
I got a little present from hashem. I have been extremely busy the past week or so making it much easier for me. That being said I am getting back on to regular schedule which means things will be getting a little harder. Also, with pesach coming I will have even more time on my hands so I'm a little worried about that.
I am trying to take one day at a time though. I also have been trying to work on my emunah and trust in hashem. I have been finding that the more I trust him, and ask for his help the easier it is. I also have been doing what tiger suggested and when I get an urge I say to myself "I know i want to look and that I could look and probably no one will know, but I trust hashem that this is not good for me and I have decided to follow what he says over what I want." It's strange to me but saying this really helps. I think until now I have always tried to come up with reasons why I really don't want to look at porn. This time around I find myself taking a different approach. I am admitting that I do want to look, but even so I won't because Hashem told me not to. 

@Shlomo24 I really hope one day my answer to that will be no. But at this point i think that yes I probably would. 
@tiger looking forward. Your last post was a huge help

Keep it up and keep on going! The first two weeks were my hardest. You passed them. Not that it's easy street after that, but you have tasted success, and iyh more to come.

great going keep up the honesty

Some days are just hard. I can usually feel it in the morning. I know that today will just be one of those days. Therefore, I made myself come on here and post. Hopefully it will give me the chizuk to fight another day.
I read an email from which had a piece from Dov where he said that if ones only motivation is the fear of getting caught they will not succeed long term. It got me thinking a bit. I do think that the main reason I am here is because I am afraid that one day I will get caught. But I think that the reason for that is because I really do want/enjoy watching porn and a part of me really doesn't want to stop. But there is another part of me that really wants to want to stop (as strange as that sounds). I don't to want to want to look at porn. I just can't help it. 
I do hope that Hashem at some point will make me want to stop and not find the thought of lookig at porn do appealing.

Every day that you stay away from looking at inappropriate sights is going to remove more of the desire to watch. There is short term and long term. For the short term, keep posting. Know there is a big oilam out here that you dont want to disappoint. For the long term you have to find more meaning in your life, something that will help you develop an innate pride - "i dont watch these things no matter what". We are here for you. Hatzlocha.

chizukconstant wrote on 27 Mar 2017 14:06:

Your honesty is inspirijg. It's powerful to be able to admit that you don't want to want to look, but currently you do want to.

chizukconstant wrote on 27 Mar 2017 14:06:

I was there before. Had ambivalent feelings about porn and masturbation. Now, I get no enjoyment from it at all.

When I fall, I'm being pushed down by a cruel master. It's enslavement. Do yourself a favor and quit now. Quit before you learn to hate porn, where you won't even want it, but you'll be so addicted, you'll do it anyways. 

Peace

I have been doing well bh but I know things will be getting tough. I will be home a lot alone this coming week before Pesach and will therefore have a significantly harder time. Too much time on my hands with a computer always leads to a struggle for me. In the past I have rarely, if ever, succeeded in times like this. I hope this time will be different. I am going to try hard to stay in a healthy place in my mind. Remembering to trust Hashem and to ask him to remove this lust from me. But it won't be easy. 
I do have a filter on my computer but no filter is fool proof. I have realized a long time ago that filters help to a certain extent. They make it more difficult to watch porn. But not by much. If I am determined and if I allow myself to get into a bad mindset where my taavah take control I will always find a way around any filter.
My goal is to try to live a healthier life. To learn and teach myself that even if I can watch porn I don't have to. I can say no.