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Giving it a go one day at a time
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TOPIC: Giving it a go one day at a time 23935 Views

Re: Giving it a go one day at a time 09 Jul 2015 23:36 #259181

  • serenity
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That's why it's "one day at a time". Other thoughts can be scary.
Much Hatzlacha!

My Threads:
Glad to be here
Don't slip it hurts
Lions & Tigers & Internet, Oh My!

--"ולא המדרש עיקר, אלא המעשה"
--"To promise not to do a thing is the surest way in the world to make a body want to go and do that very thing." Mark Twain
--"If, when you honestly want to, you find you cannot quit entirely, or if when drinking (or lusting), you have little control over the amount you take, you are probably alcoholic (or sexaholic)." AA Big Book P. 45. Parenthesis added.
--You hit rock bottom when you decide to stop digging.

Re: Giving it a go one day at a time 14 Jul 2015 18:37 #259445

  • ysftw
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Can't believe I fell. The higher the number the more dangerous. But I know how to fix, and I will. Let's see how it goes. One day at a time

Re: Giving it a go one day at a time 14 Jul 2015 19:46 #259452

  • serenity
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  • "ONE DAY AT A TIME"
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Welcome back.

Personally I can't believe it when I don't act out. It's just chasdei Hashem for me. Each day it is a miracle.
Much Hatzlacha!

My Threads:
Glad to be here
Don't slip it hurts
Lions & Tigers & Internet, Oh My!

--"ולא המדרש עיקר, אלא המעשה"
--"To promise not to do a thing is the surest way in the world to make a body want to go and do that very thing." Mark Twain
--"If, when you honestly want to, you find you cannot quit entirely, or if when drinking (or lusting), you have little control over the amount you take, you are probably alcoholic (or sexaholic)." AA Big Book P. 45. Parenthesis added.
--You hit rock bottom when you decide to stop digging.

Re: Giving it a go one day at a time 14 Aug 2015 16:39 #261812

  • ysftw
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  • Posts: 160
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I'm back after a while, sereneity is right, and perhaps has revealed that i have too much arrogance here.
I just want to be free of this.
Still yet again I fell, and yet again around the 30 day mark which is clearly a major issue for me.
There's an idea (from the rambam) about true teshuva being about returning to the same point and choosing differently, perhaps because you are now a different person. That is now what I am going for.
in addition i have started the taphsic method and we'll see how that goes too.
shabbat shalom to all

Re: Giving it a go one day at a time 14 Aug 2015 18:03 #261816

  • cordnoy
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ysftw wrote:
I'm back after a while, sereneity is right, and perhaps has revealed that i have too much arrogance here.
I just want to be free of this.
Still yet again I fell, and yet again around the 30 day mark which is clearly a major issue for me.
There's an idea (from the rambam) about true teshuva being about returning to the same point and choosing differently, perhaps because you are now a different person. That is now what I am going for.
in addition i have started the taphsic method and we'll see how that goes too.
shabbat shalom to all


Pardon me for bein' strong.
I am on my mobile and still searched thru the past four pages, which obviously takes time.
This is what I have seen.....
One more day....
Just need to sleep....
Get thru the night....
Another day....
Whew...three weeks...
Yiras shamayim and sleep....
Another day....

D'ya think it's time to change tactics? I have asked you this several times and I don't believe I got much of a response. Forgive me if I am mistaken....I only mean it for your benefit.

B'hatzlachah
My email: thenewme613@hotmail.com
My threads: Mikvah Night - Page 1, Page 2, Page 3, Last Page

https://guardyoureyes.com/forum/1-Break-Free/210029-Tryin
:pinch: Warning: Spoiler!
My job: Punchin' bag of GYE - "NeshamaInCharge"
Quote from the chevra: "Is Cordnoy truly a Treasure Island pirate from the Southern Seas?"

MY POSTS ARE NOT WRITTEN AS A MODERATOR UNLESS EXPLICITLY STATED.

Re: Giving it a go one day at a time 17 Aug 2015 14:40 #261920

  • ysftw
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  • Posts: 160
  • Karma: 8
cordnoy wrote:
ysftw wrote:
I'm back after a while, sereneity is right, and perhaps has revealed that i have too much arrogance here.
I just want to be free of this.
Still yet again I fell, and yet again around the 30 day mark which is clearly a major issue for me.
There's an idea (from the rambam) about true teshuva being about returning to the same point and choosing differently, perhaps because you are now a different person. That is now what I am going for.
in addition i have started the taphsic method and we'll see how that goes too.
shabbat shalom to all


Pardon me for bein' strong.
I am on my mobile and still searched thru the past four pages, which obviously takes time.
This is what I have seen.....
One more day....
Just need to sleep....
Get thru the night....
Another day....
Whew...three weeks...
Yiras shamayim and sleep....
Another day....

D'ya think it's time to change tactics? I have asked you this several times and I don't believe I got much of a response. Forgive me if I am mistaken....I only mean it for your benefit.

B'hatzlachah



dont worry about it, i guess i dont approach the forum in a particularly normal way, I suppose I use it more as a diary of my progress and struggles and falls during this journey.

as it happens though yes, you're right, what was going on before I don't think was enough, I think i constantly underestimate the full extent of my addiction.

which is a painful realisation.

but as i've said, I've started the taphsic method, but made it strong for myself, targeted at weak points, and also used the realisation that a fall usually follows from a set progression of behaviour which could transpire over a number of days.

my only concern with the taphsic method is that I've targeted hirhurim amongst other things and I'm a bit worried I'll become obsessed with not thinking about sexual stuff, to the point that the tiniest sexual thing could set me off.

which is not a good place to be.

any thoughts on this would be rather appreciated!?

(I suppose it's a similar thought to the one that says the only person who thinks as much about food as an obese person, is the anorexic) I dont want to become obsessed with not being obsessed....like i said thoughts would be valuable!

Re: Giving it a go one day at a time 17 Aug 2015 16:52 #261939

  • cordnoy
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  • Posts: 12063
  • Karma: 653
ysftw wrote:
cordnoy wrote:
ysftw wrote:
I'm back after a while, sereneity is right, and perhaps has revealed that i have too much arrogance here.
I just want to be free of this.
Still yet again I fell, and yet again around the 30 day mark which is clearly a major issue for me.
There's an idea (from the rambam) about true teshuva being about returning to the same point and choosing differently, perhaps because you are now a different person. That is now what I am going for.
in addition i have started the taphsic method and we'll see how that goes too.
shabbat shalom to all


Pardon me for bein' strong.
I am on my mobile and still searched thru the past four pages, which obviously takes time.
This is what I have seen.....
One more day....
Just need to sleep....
Get thru the night....
Another day....
Whew...three weeks...
Yiras shamayim and sleep....
Another day....

D'ya think it's time to change tactics? I have asked you this several times and I don't believe I got much of a response. Forgive me if I am mistaken....I only mean it for your benefit.

B'hatzlachah



dont worry about it, i guess i dont approach the forum in a particularly normal way, I suppose I use it more as a diary of my progress and struggles and falls during this journey.

as it happens though yes, you're right, what was going on before I don't think was enough, I think i constantly underestimate the full extent of my addiction.

which is a painful realisation.

but as i've said, I've started the taphsic method, but made it strong for myself, targeted at weak points, and also used the realisation that a fall usually follows from a set progression of behaviour which could transpire over a number of days.

my only concern with the taphsic method is that I've targeted hirhurim amongst other things and I'm a bit worried I'll become obsessed with not thinking about sexual stuff, to the point that the tiniest sexual thing could set me off.

which is not a good place to be.

any thoughts on this would be rather appreciated!?

(I suppose it's a similar thought to the one that says the only person who thinks as much about food as an obese person, is the anorexic) I dont want to become obsessed with not being obsessed....like i said thoughts would be valuable!


Thank you for bein' honest.

As the Tapshik method, and the way you write it is not what i would be suggestin' for you, i will leave it for others to advise you on.

b'hatzlachah to you
My email: thenewme613@hotmail.com
My threads: Mikvah Night - Page 1, Page 2, Page 3, Last Page

https://guardyoureyes.com/forum/1-Break-Free/210029-Tryin
:pinch: Warning: Spoiler!
My job: Punchin' bag of GYE - "NeshamaInCharge"
Quote from the chevra: "Is Cordnoy truly a Treasure Island pirate from the Southern Seas?"

MY POSTS ARE NOT WRITTEN AS A MODERATOR UNLESS EXPLICITLY STATED.

Re: Giving it a go one day at a time 21 Aug 2015 14:00 #262476

  • ysftw
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  • Gold Boarder
  • Posts: 160
  • Karma: 8
cordnoy wrote:
ysftw wrote:
cordnoy wrote:
ysftw wrote:
I'm back after a while, sereneity is right, and perhaps has revealed that i have too much arrogance here.
I just want to be free of this.
Still yet again I fell, and yet again around the 30 day mark which is clearly a major issue for me.
There's an idea (from the rambam) about true teshuva being about returning to the same point and choosing differently, perhaps because you are now a different person. That is now what I am going for.
in addition i have started the taphsic method and we'll see how that goes too.
shabbat shalom to all


Pardon me for bein' strong.
I am on my mobile and still searched thru the past four pages, which obviously takes time.
This is what I have seen.....
One more day....
Just need to sleep....
Get thru the night....
Another day....
Whew...three weeks...
Yiras shamayim and sleep....
Another day....

D'ya think it's time to change tactics? I have asked you this several times and I don't believe I got much of a response. Forgive me if I am mistaken....I only mean it for your benefit.

B'hatzlachah



dont worry about it, i guess i dont approach the forum in a particularly normal way, I suppose I use it more as a diary of my progress and struggles and falls during this journey.

as it happens though yes, you're right, what was going on before I don't think was enough, I think i constantly underestimate the full extent of my addiction.

which is a painful realisation.

but as i've said, I've started the taphsic method, but made it strong for myself, targeted at weak points, and also used the realisation that a fall usually follows from a set progression of behaviour which could transpire over a number of days.

my only concern with the taphsic method is that I've targeted hirhurim amongst other things and I'm a bit worried I'll become obsessed with not thinking about sexual stuff, to the point that the tiniest sexual thing could set me off.

which is not a good place to be.

any thoughts on this would be rather appreciated!?

(I suppose it's a similar thought to the one that says the only person who thinks as much about food as an obese person, is the anorexic) I dont want to become obsessed with not being obsessed....like i said thoughts would be valuable!


Thank you for bein' honest.

As the Tapshik method, and the way you write it is not what i would be suggestin' for you, i will leave it for others to advise you on.

b'hatzlachah to you



you cant leave me in suspense. that's not fair!

Re: Giving it a go one day at a time 21 Aug 2015 14:08 #262477

  • ysftw
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  • Posts: 160
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anyway shabbat is coming. I'm happy with this week so far. The tashpic method is working well although i am aware that it's coming up to two weeks clean and I have to gear up again for things to get harder. It's a bit scary how long I've been trying to kick the habit. And worth thinking about a lot. But we keep going...

Re: Giving it a go one day at a time 21 Aug 2015 15:58 #262496

  • cordnoy
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  • Posts: 12063
  • Karma: 653
ysftw wrote:
cordnoy wrote:
ysftw wrote:
cordnoy wrote:
ysftw wrote:
I'm back after a while, sereneity is right, and perhaps has revealed that i have too much arrogance here.
I just want to be free of this.
Still yet again I fell, and yet again around the 30 day mark which is clearly a major issue for me.
There's an idea (from the rambam) about true teshuva being about returning to the same point and choosing differently, perhaps because you are now a different person. That is now what I am going for.
in addition i have started the taphsic method and we'll see how that goes too.
shabbat shalom to all


Pardon me for bein' strong.
I am on my mobile and still searched thru the past four pages, which obviously takes time.
This is what I have seen.....
One more day....
Just need to sleep....
Get thru the night....
Another day....
Whew...three weeks...
Yiras shamayim and sleep....
Another day....

D'ya think it's time to change tactics? I have asked you this several times and I don't believe I got much of a response. Forgive me if I am mistaken....I only mean it for your benefit.

B'hatzlachah



dont worry about it, i guess i dont approach the forum in a particularly normal way, I suppose I use it more as a diary of my progress and struggles and falls during this journey.

as it happens though yes, you're right, what was going on before I don't think was enough, I think i constantly underestimate the full extent of my addiction.

which is a painful realisation.

but as i've said, I've started the taphsic method, but made it strong for myself, targeted at weak points, and also used the realisation that a fall usually follows from a set progression of behaviour which could transpire over a number of days.

my only concern with the taphsic method is that I've targeted hirhurim amongst other things and I'm a bit worried I'll become obsessed with not thinking about sexual stuff, to the point that the tiniest sexual thing could set me off.

which is not a good place to be.

any thoughts on this would be rather appreciated!?

(I suppose it's a similar thought to the one that says the only person who thinks as much about food as an obese person, is the anorexic) I dont want to become obsessed with not being obsessed....like i said thoughts would be valuable!


Thank you for bein' honest.

As the Tapshik method, and the way you write it is not what i would be suggestin' for you, i will leave it for others to advise you on.

b'hatzlachah to you



you cant leave me in suspense. that's not fair!


Read my posts from any other thread.
My email: thenewme613@hotmail.com
My threads: Mikvah Night - Page 1, Page 2, Page 3, Last Page

https://guardyoureyes.com/forum/1-Break-Free/210029-Tryin
:pinch: Warning: Spoiler!
My job: Punchin' bag of GYE - "NeshamaInCharge"
Quote from the chevra: "Is Cordnoy truly a Treasure Island pirate from the Southern Seas?"

MY POSTS ARE NOT WRITTEN AS A MODERATOR UNLESS EXPLICITLY STATED.

Re: Giving it a go one day at a time 25 Aug 2015 13:25 #262702

  • ysftw
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Cordnoy
Do u want to suggest a particular one?


On the other hand, I'm still in chartered territory for me. I'm on 15 days. And the method seems to be working really well.

Especially with added conponents about hirhurim.

Things will start getting very hard in the next few days.

Anyone got thoughts on how to really deal with things when they get very hard?

Re: Giving it a go one day at a time 25 Aug 2015 14:03 #262708

  • cordnoy
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  • Posts: 12063
  • Karma: 653
ysftw wrote:
Cordnoy
Do u want to suggest a particular one?


On the other hand, I'm still in chartered territory for me. I'm on 15 days. And the method seems to be working really well.

Especially with added conponents about hirhurim.

Things will start getting very hard in the next few days.

Anyone got thoughts on how to really deal with things when they get very hard?


I dont know what will speak to you more.
Try either of my threads (linked in signature below).

bhatzlachah
My email: thenewme613@hotmail.com
My threads: Mikvah Night - Page 1, Page 2, Page 3, Last Page

https://guardyoureyes.com/forum/1-Break-Free/210029-Tryin
:pinch: Warning: Spoiler!
My job: Punchin' bag of GYE - "NeshamaInCharge"
Quote from the chevra: "Is Cordnoy truly a Treasure Island pirate from the Southern Seas?"

MY POSTS ARE NOT WRITTEN AS A MODERATOR UNLESS EXPLICITLY STATED.

Re: Giving it a go one day at a time 28 Aug 2015 14:48 #262882

  • ysftw
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Okay thank you.
So far my taphsic method has worked really well and I need to redo the neder after shabbat.

It seems to be that whilst I'm avoiding inappropriate thought and material it doesn't have to be done such that I freak out about it. It can be disciplined stern and meticulous instead.

Hope everyone has an amazing shabbat!

Re: Giving it a go one day at a time 02 Sep 2015 06:34 #263104

  • ysftw
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  • Posts: 160
  • Karma: 8
Just renewed my neder the other day, and the first one really worked so b"h much of the same here
But also prepared for the reality that things are going to start becoming very challenging now as it gets closer to my personal best.
Again b"h I will have the koach to move past this...One day at a time...One neder at a time, never forgetting that I'm an addict and my addiction is just waiting to get me

Re: Giving it a go one day at a time 02 Sep 2015 10:27 #263107

  • cordnoy
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  • Posts: 12063
  • Karma: 653
Who do you think is gonna make it real tough for you as you near your personal best?
My email: thenewme613@hotmail.com
My threads: Mikvah Night - Page 1, Page 2, Page 3, Last Page

https://guardyoureyes.com/forum/1-Break-Free/210029-Tryin
:pinch: Warning: Spoiler!
My job: Punchin' bag of GYE - "NeshamaInCharge"
Quote from the chevra: "Is Cordnoy truly a Treasure Island pirate from the Southern Seas?"

MY POSTS ARE NOT WRITTEN AS A MODERATOR UNLESS EXPLICITLY STATED.
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