Speak to people here.

Hi guys,

some big deal has happened today, first all my family went on holidays so I'm alone at home for an entire week with 3 iPads and 2 computers, Hachem Yérah'em..

I fell some hours ago with trying to search some expressive pictures on my phone, with filter fortunately. At the beginning it was just a desire, and I permit it to grow and grow more so I searched these kind of pictures.. After more than 20 minutes of struggle I resigned myself and I took my little sister's (14) iPad without filter to have a big fall as usual.. Then I saw her last research on web was " 50 things of grey film" or something like that I don't know exactely what it is I just know it's a new moovie with improper scene in cinema.
Instantly I felt very sad for my little sister viewing this kind of trailers and I remember how much H'izuk I gave to friend to convince them to not go view this kind of stuff even if it was on cinema and scene are not so "attractive" etc.. B"H our Father in Chamayim gave me strenght to stop here and go to a Michna Chiour.

As I said before I wanted to speak to my Rav of this problem but I was too afraid. On the way to beth midrash I felt this kind of sincerity feeling Min Hachamayim that I have to tell him TONIGHT, not later or so. Hachem Helped me making the other guy of the chiour late and I told to my Rav about all this stuff. He gave me lot of H'izuk ! The only thing that afraid is that I saw the way he spoke about that that he hadn't understand that it is a really addiction, no just a problem of studying mussar of things like that.. Anyway he gave me a lot of strenght, at least for tonight..
Tomorrow B"H I will also have a chiour and be back home late and tired so I hope no problem will happen but I'm afraid for the entire week alone.. I know the (good) GYE mentality for recovering is based on a day by day mind, but I really need advices for the end of the week I'm afraid of falling.. I read the GYE handbook and forum as often I possible but I see it's not working so well, it lacks regularity.. Does anyone has advices on how read and apply GYE book principles ? Maybe every morning before going outside ? On subway ? Before sleeping ? Also thinking about register to find a sponsor..

I really need help I felt that Hachem Gives me a gift in helping me not be motsi zera lavatala today + h'izuk of my Rav but I feel very distant from Him because of what I've watched..

you need a plan of how to deal with all those electronics in the house.
Readin' handbook ain't gonna help at this moment.

so, what's it gonna be?

b'hatzlachah

Cordnoy is so right. First restrict your availability to view. Then you got a shot at least of being able to take in some wisdom. As long as the shmutz is but a moment away you can't think clearly.

Palti-Yossef wrote:


Dear Palti-Yossef, we need to remember that HaShem loves us all SO much. He loves us infinitely.

I always find that positive focus is a great attitude.

Many times the yeitzar harah tells us to feel, who are we, what are we worth, etc. We've got to just focus on the positive and on how we can improve.

Hatzlacha rabbah!

You named yourself Palti-Yossef after 2 big Tzadikim who overcame a difficult nisoyon in this area. This is the way you want to picture yourself. Go for it. Here is the nisoyon. Now when you are reading this post is the time. Do a big act right now! As soon as you finish reading this post. Call your Rav, the one you confided in. Tell him you'll be over to him in a few minutes(however long it takes you to get to him). Put all of the equipment that there is in the house in a bag and seal the bag and bring it to the rav right now. Give it to him to keep for you until your family come back. This is the sword of Palti Ben Layish and the vision that you have of yourself withstanding the nisoyon is the vision of Yossef.

PALTI-YOSSEF do it now.

Keep posting, you're doing well! I like the positivity in the name of your post. You stress the forward momentum and action!

Hatzlacha!

Makes perfect sense:

Lust is taking.
Love is giving.

Lust and Love are not compatible together.

Are we takers? Or are we givers?

This struggle has a lot to do with being self-centred.

The world does not revolve around me.
Rather, the question should be what can I do for Hashem. Not what can Hashem do for me.

Once we become a "giver" and not a "taker" then we begin to realise how much Hashem has done for us in this world.

Wow, so much powerfull h'izouk, I didn't expected this much, moreover in this short time !
Thank you all, it's a very strong feeling to see I'm not alone anymore.

This morning I understood brakha Hach'ar "Hamékhine Mitsadé Gaver". I had to go to School early in the morning but I had a big house problem so I had to stay and set this. Was afraid, it was kind of serious. B'H I succeed in resolving the problem what permited me to stay longer at home as I had already miss my morning class.
Thanks to HKBH and this problem He Sent me I read all you h'izouk before going to school and I realized I couldn't stay with all these electronics at home anymore. Powerfull post of Hashivali gave me lot of strenght. I took all these bad stuffs and went to my grandmother (too afraid to call my Rav..) and now all is in security !
Gam Zou Letova, who knows what could have happened tonight after my chiour, I'm less afraid to return home now, thanks to you.
I felt so stupid in reading your posts, telling to myself why I didn't think to that earlier. Anw I'm happy to have spoke to my Rav yesterday and to have put off this bad things out of home for the week, feeling something different from my usual way of resigning myself !
All thanks to you

Hashivalisesonyishecho wrote:


Good thin' he doesn't know the meanin' of my name.

Palti-Yossef, WOW!!!

You withstood the nisoyon, truly Palti-Yossef!!! What tremendous strength you displayed with what you did. Keep it up. I am inspired.

Hats off to you buddy!

you are a mekabel

ya gonna make it!

cordnoy wrote:


You have peaked my curiosity. What's the meaning? If I like it fine. If not I will either figure out a better meaning or I will make you a shinuy hashem. I have so much respect for you and your name has to be appropriate.

you won't, so let's leave it at that.

thanks

Part of working on shmiras ainayim is to not need to satisfy every curiosity. So I will leave it at that.